Created Sun. Feb. 14, 2010, updated Feb. 19, 2010
Educating Your Child
Itís Your Responsibility!
Individual Assignments Are Better
The Suzuki Method
Teaching Restraint and Kindness
The Fruits of a Bad Harvest
Home Schoolers Perform Much Better
Lessons They Don't Teach
These are New Below!
God Appoints Parents Over ALL
Peer Pressure on Kids
A Brave New World (just kidding)
Independence Is Vital to Survival
At some time back around 2002, if not earlier, I had written an article on Home Schooling. To my surprise just the other day, I go looking for this article and it is no where to be found in the last 6 years. I did find my old Microsoft Word doc with the article. So I now present that, updated slightly, today. As I see it, Real Christians will Home School their kids. It is essential. You'll see!
6 And these words which I am commanding you today shall be on your heart.
7 And you shall teach them to your sons, and shall speak of them as you sit in your house, and as you walk in the way, and as you are lying down, and as you are rising up.
18 And you shall lay these words up in your hearts, and in your souls, and shall bind them for a sign on your hand. And they shall be for frontlets between your eyes.
19 And you shall teach them to your sons by speaking of them as you sit in your house, and as you go in the way, and as you lie down, and as you rise up.
From the days of Adam to the days of Moses and many times after, God commanded His people to teach their children about their God. Not necessarily in a formal setting such as a classroom but at all times, such as the ones described in the previous scriptures above. It is our solemn duty to teach and instruct our kids in regards to all aspects of obedience to God. That means all Godís laws, commandments, and principles. Morals, culture, values, ethics, standards, and anything else you can imagine.
I also want to point out the obvious, or at least, it should be obvious and yet is not, that this is one of those few accounts in the law of Moses where it is or should be clear that verse 18 is figurative and symbolic. How do you lay words up in your heart? How do you bind words? God was alluding to the things a priest at the temple wore. The ephod (a sort of vest) over the chest/heart! We would keep words in our hearts, our center and deepest core, so to speak; what is most important to us. In fact, our whole bodies are covered so to speak, with the words of God. On our wrists and between our eyes, even as the priests wore such things there.
The ways of God were to saturate our lives in every aspect. His ways were to be our ways. And it was very important to instill this in our kids. It is a major requirement of God and a serious responsibility that every parent has. Anyone not obeying God, will surely have no place in God's Kingdom.
I might also add that we can not teach what we do not know. So we must seek out the knowledge wisdom of God ourselves, before we can give it to our kids.
not have the right to pass this responsibility on to others and neglect it
ourselves. God gave this responsibility only and directly to the parents of a
child. That is not to say that formal schooling has no place or usefulness. I
believe that it does, in respects to secondary or specialized education in a
But it should be a supplement to a full curriculum or agenda of the
parents. Now in previous ages and eras, farming and agriculture, or the tending
of herds of animals, or hunting wild game, was the primary practical knowledge
that a father gave to his kids to enable them to survive.
father who worked a trade would also teach that to his sons. But in the age of
the industrial revolution, passing on a trade or the farm was no longer always
the option. Life changed and jobs were apt to be different and kids might have
the chance to learn entirely new professions. Employers might give them what
training they need in that respect. Apprenticeships were also another way of
learning a job as well.
then we institutionalized education so that everyone could get one. That was
what we were given as an excuse, anyway. There were some who benefited from
this. But many, even most, were already receiving a good education from their
parents on the primary subjects of reading, writing, and arithmetic. But I
believe there were other objectives in encouraging parents to give up their
duties to the government. It enables the government to influence the kids as
they would like, rather than as the parents would like. It was as if the
government was the true owner of the kids.
Part of this is the result of our current educational system. There was a time when children of all ages learned together in a small classroom in one small building or just from their parents before formal education was established in this country. But then those who were elected to represent us decided to treat education like manufacturing and mass educate kids. We build very large multi room buildings to house many children from all over the place. This centralization was seen as beneficial. I donít see it myself. I think it was a move to ensure more control over the education process and to make sure all kids got indoctrinated the same way on a mass scale.
At this point, I must introduce you to John Taylor Gatto (links to his site) and his book, the most important book written in the Industrial age and maybe of the last 1000 years. Called: The Underground History of American Education." It can be read for free but I recommend the book so you can underline and read it whenever convenient. Gatto will show you the many places where the sinister goals of the elite were openly published and still available in archives. They no doubt figured no one other than their own would ever bother to read this crap. But Gatto is a thorough researcher who is passionate about what he does. John Gatto also strongly urges Home Schooling as well.
The real purpose of education was to control how much of it we got, to minimize how much we got; you might say they ration it out in meager portions, and control who knows what, reserving the most important things for only a few elite types. They wanted to keep us blind and ignorant, knowing just enough to be useful without being dangerous. As a result, students began getting more dumb rather than more smart, with this schooling. The real purpose was to condition kids, not educate them.
Then in 1964, the ruthlessness became more prominent and accelerated as they got rid of good teachers who taught far more than what their bosses wanted them to, and replaced them with those who would obey and teach what they were told and nothing more. It started with big city schools and later reach small town America. And then they let discipline go to hell so that kids would be intentionally destroyed so that they would never be a threat to the system or be able to concentrate and actually learn.
As well, kids are indoctrinated in the wonderful plans our benevolent leaders have in store for us, so that the kids would be good little robots and repeat the party line of their comrades and not get out of line. Over time, they have managed to create kids who think nothing like their parents. In large part, this is the fault of the parents, who left all education to the schools instead of keeping it for themselves and teaching it themselves.
So we have reaped what we have sown. We let everyone do everything for us. Someone else often does our cooking at restaurants and delicatessens. Someone else fixes our cars, treats our illnesses, takes away our trash, grows and produces our food, repairs our houses or apartments, handles our legal affairs, does our books and taxes. We do not have to do a thing for ourselves and we would not know how to, anyway, in most instances. This is how the elite wanted it so that we would be dependant upon their system to survive and then they can threaten us with being cut off if we do not behave by their standard of behavior.
is where we now stand, dependant upon everyone and everything and doing almost
nothing for ourselves. What a great system, huh? Someone knew what they were
Assignments Are Better
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true that kids of the same age tend to progress at somewhat similar levels in
most regards emotionally, but not quite as much intellectually. My opinion is
that kids need individual instruction and need to learn and be advanced
according to the progress they make individually and not all herded at the same
pace. If a student is bright and eager, let them move more quickly. If they are
slow, instruct them more carefully and allow them to grow as they will. But we
prefer, or someone somewhere prefers, to herd them all and keep them all at the
same slow stupid level. I believe the education process has been sabotaged.
each went at their own pace, you would see different ages mixed into different
subjects. Some gifted kids go to college at 11 or 12 when most are 18 or older.
This is quite appropriate and more natural. In the real world and the work
place, brilliant young people will often work right along side old veterans.
This is as it should be. But we have been conditioned by our school system to
think only in terms of the same age. It is wrong and needs to be corrected. Kids
donít need plenty of kids their own precise age to associate with. Just the
the laws exist in most states that give the state and/or the federal government
a vested interest in the protection and care of a child. This seems good on the
surface until you broaden what is necessary for a childís interest. So they
now define what is acceptable to teach a child about morals and if you tell them
a certain life style or behavior is wrong, the government may decide you are an
unfit parent and take your kids from you. I believe it should be clear in the
law that governments can only rescue a child from extreme neglect or physical
danger that is clearly proven in a public process with due process of law.
stands right now in
Anyway, our kids should be ours to train and raise as we see fit. We have not benefited by allowing others to take on that responsibility for us. We have lost much, instead. Too much! Christians have every right to do everything legal in their power to retain their rights to do as they please within reason to keep and teach their children as they see fit. It is they who produced the children, and care and provide for them, so it is they, who should have all rights to the kids, with the exception of great extremes of abuse.
several kids sleep in the same room, it is no big deal. It is not the law. If
they don't get to eat steak, twice a week, it should be your business, not that
of the state. If you want to teach God's law, that is your right, and the state
has no business saying otherwise. It is we who pay the bills for our kids, not
the government. So we should get to say what the kids get or do not. If the
government wants to program your kids or attempt to, make them pay for the
upkeep, right? And without taxing you for it, which is basically making you pay
while they play and brain wash your kids.
took a long time for us to fully realize the serious consequences of us turning
over the teaching of our kids to others. Many still do not realize the
consequences. But if you are alert, awake, and aware of what is going on, then
you should able to see that Godís requirement that parents teach their kids,
makes sense. They are our responsibility alone and no one elseís. That would
even include the basics of reading, writing, and arithmetic, that are necessary
in todayís world for survival. Beyond the basics of high school, then a
secondary education could be pursued so that employment in specialized areas
could be obtained.
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was a pioneer in teaching children in
these were not great revelations in his method. They were kind of obvious. But
Suzuki felt kids would progress faster if they followed the parents as the
parents learned to play. The parents would set the good example and pace, and
the kids would happily follow along. It was also effective because everyone was
involved in the same thing and doing it together, making it much more fun. Kids
do not learn well in an independent environment. Parental involvement changed it
definitely believe in the Suzuki method. It makes perfect sense. It is not a
crime to not know something. But it is a crime to not want to learn and grow and
have your kids learn right along with you. No one is better qualified to teach
kids than their parents and kids will have more trust in them and be more
willing to learn unless there is abuse and hate in the family. So this is yet
another example that reinforces the idea that it should be the parents who teach
their kids and not others. The kids want their mom and dad to be their teachers.
The worst thing a parent can do is to ignore their responsibility to teach their kids. If you do not teach them, then they will have no reason to take it seriously since you do not seem to do it or believe it yourself and teach it yourself. By your not teaching it, it gives the appearance that you do not care or that it is not a big part of your life. Further, if you do not teach them what you want, they will allow someone else to teach and influence them. The schools are not going to teach kids anything except what will benefit the government. That would only be reasonable.
well, if you let the schools and teachers do it, they then appear like superior
authorities, which they are not! They are paid whores, so to speak, who will
teach whatever, as long as they are paid for their services. When you teach, you
become the authority, as is only proper and right. If you let someone else be the
authority, then soon your kids will listen to them and trust them over you. I
know. I went to school and my parents often knew little and I came to respect
the teachers more than the parents. Of course, because mine were not bright,
that helped the situation. Were it not for the schools, I would have leaned far
less. But most parents are quite capable and should take on the
responsibility. Give it away and you might not ever get it back.
consider this. The Bible ultimately fingers Satan as the ruler of this world.
Satan offered Jesus all the nations of the earth if he would worship Satan. They
were Satanís to offer, but Jesus refused. The
do not teach them something, they will gravitate toward whatever pleases their
flesh, in all likelihood. They will go with the flow and ride with the current
to wherever it is going. So take actions now.
It has always been God's will that the parents should be all things to their kids, as duly appointed and authorized to act in place of God as the care-takers of their children, in behalf of God and themselves. Parents provide all material sustenance and covering, shelter. Teachers of knowledge, skill, morals, habits, self-discipline, moderation. Parents provide the food. They provide the love and nurturing. They are all things to their kids.
The general theory behind it all, I suspect, was that while some kids will have rotten parents, maybe even many would, that parents would still offer the most likely chance of looking after the best interests and welfare of their own kids. Most strangers will not have any vested interest in kids that do not belong to them. Many kids who are stolen or enslaved, are treated horribly and used by those who use them selfishly. Parents are the very best chance that kids have. So God mandates all things to the parents, to insure the best interests of the kids.
More and more in our days in the 21st century, the last century, for sure, before God's Kingdom, others care for our kids, provide lessons, meals, child care, recreation, entertainment, and whatever. TV and movies do that, too. So parents are hardly left with anything to do with their own kids, except pay for all the "stranger" care the kids receive. Mom and dad often only serve as taxi drivers, if that. This is the opposite of what God intended, but just what the devil likes. The devil wants to be the parent to your kids. Wha da ya say?!
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say that kids need school to learn social skills. The question I have is how did
the world ever manage before formal education was introduced in the 1860ís? I
say that is a bunch of crap. They say kids need to learn how to fight and cope.
What garbage! Fighting is not a constructive way to do anything. When kids are
young, they need protection. They are vulnerable and unskilled at defending
themselves from psychological attacks and verbal and physical abuse.
you teach them proper behavior and then teach them good coping skills, just as
the military prepares new recruits in boot camp before they turn them out into
the battle. Only after the basic training has been successfully completed do you
turn your kids out into the world, fully prepared to meet the challenge of nasty
so prematurely, would be like ripping a fetus out of the mother at 4 or 5
months, long before it is ready and able to survive out of the womb. The fetus
will most likely die or develop serious health problems throughout its life.
When it is ready, when it has had a full 9 months, then it is ready for the next
level, life outside the womb. It is the same with kids. Give them the shelter
they need while young and delicate and they will be ready later when they are
People who use the poor lame excuse that kids need socialization are just those who want to continue the brutal psychological torture that many kids endure in school which leaves them scarred for life or even traumatized. Shell shocked kids are usually ineffective and those in power like such sheep who can not effectively function because of the accumulated psychological scars they have endured. Donít send your kids to those psychological butchering camps. If you do, I seriously question your love for them.
But kids need rounded, well balanced socialization, with all ages. This reflects the real world they will work in, typically upon graduation of high school or college. When I first went to work, almost no one was my age. It felt different but much better. No where near as much judgment or pressure. I liked it much more. Everyone being your own age is artificial and not healthy. There is no one older to learn from, except the sole authority of the teacher. No one younger to bring out a little bit of compassion and a chance to nurture and teach, so that you learn and teach at the same time, which is more like at work.
Restraint and Kindness
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is another aspect of school that is bad and harmful. When children are young,
they tend to be much less self conscious. They are not as aware of themselves
and what they do as they are when they get older, particularly in adulthood. In
addition, their emotions are much stronger, uncontrolled, unrestrained,
uninhibited, and often very undisciplined.. As a result, they can be quite cruel
or nasty without really being aware of it. They can speak thoughtlessly and
hurtfully. Their job, as they get older, is to learn to temper their feelings
and their thoughts and words. They learn to give some thought to what they say
and how people might take it. At least, they should do this. Some never learn it
and are not pleasant to deal with or be around.
when kids are together, they can exhibit quite a bit of cruelty to other kids.
Some kids develop more quickly in a social way and are more socially adept and
can be a significant influence on their peers. If they tend toward
thoughtlessness and cruelty, they can harm other kids in a big way and have a
big impact on others. And kids who are not as socially adept, or who are rather
awkward in that respect, or stand out in some unusual way or are rather
different than most of their peers; these will often get targeted by kids who
are more socially in the norm and more capable in those respects.
can be very damaging to the kids who are less gifted socially. So that is why
kids must be carefully watched and monitored in their youth so as to be able to
correct your own kids if they are bullies and teach them why it is wrong and
discipline them should they tend to ignore your words of guidance and
instruction. Of if your kids are picked on, you can help instruct them on how to
be more socially adept and effective so that they can stand up to others better
or at least avoid bullies more effectively. But you will need to become aware of
how to be socially capable yourself before teaching your kids.
this is not done by schools and school teachers and administrators. Their bosses
like kids getting bullied as I see it. We are now paying a dear price for
neglecting our kids. School shootings, unheard of 20 years ago, are now routine
common occurrences all across the
is why home schooling by the parents is the single best way to deal with this
problem. They can carefully monitor their kids in smaller numbers where more
control can be exercised. Control becomes much more difficult (if not
impossible) in larger numbers because it is harder to monitor and watch
everyone, as well as guide and instruct each kid as needed. Reducing the number
of kids or increasing the number of adult supervisors greatly improves the
results. As well, teacher's hands are tied and they are not allowed to
discipline and take control. They would be fired if they did.
the group of kids is small and the parents are involved, then the needs become
apparent and can be addressed. That is why it is most important that parents are
frequently involved in their childrenís play and in their play with others, who
can be invited to play along. Kids do not receive nearly enough involvement with
their parents. And kids dearly love the play of their parents with them. I know
this from experience. It draws the parents and children closer together and
forms a much stronger bond between them.
is often at times like these that kids will suddenly bring up things completely
unrelated that might be bothering them or occupying their minds. It presents a
perfect opportunity to become aware of their concerns and address their
concerns. I have often found that what I was least expecting it, kids would
suddenly come out with problems, thinking I might be a better source than their
parents. But it was because I was out there in the ice or the ball field and not
at home hiding behind a newspaper or watching TV.
course, our world makes it difficult to spend much time with our children
anymore as we spend so much time working. All I can say is do your utmost to
reduce your needs to a minimum and increase you time with your kids to a
maximum. But they need you to play with them frequently. They will learn as you
play and instruct. Often, just your conduct will instruct them without a word
from you. You can later talk about things when at home in private.
As I said, schools have yet to grasp the dangers of herding lots of uninhibited and unsupervised kids together where they devour each other. It is not a natural setting to put kids in. Neither is it healthy or advantageous. Donít do it, if you can avoid it.
Lets also look at it this way. When you prepare your meals, do you eat the same thing every meal, every day? Of course not. That would not be healthy and your health would be a disaster in no time. Likewise, when it comes to friend and associations, we benefit most from a variety of ages and experience. The politically correct are always telling us how important diversity is. Well, lets see them buy their own philosophy. When it comes to age, diversity really is the way to go.
socially battered is not socialization. Its conditioning and learning to accept
orders and not upset the flock of peers. And try hard to compromise, so that you
can fit in and be accepted by the hoards of the mindless. Settling things
through fights is not very helpful or useful in the real world, either. Torture
is not socialization, it is brutality at its worst. Keep your kids away from
Fruits of a Bad Harvest
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problem with leaving the teaching to others is that they often donít teach
much themselves. I will illustrate. In the 19th century (1800ís)
boys whose families could afford it, typically sent them off to college at 14.
The children, men, and women of that era, were extremely literate and even
eloquent in their use of the English language. A typical text book of that era
for school kids would shame most of us today.
scores and grades have plummeted over the 20th century. One way they
have hidden this is by scaling grades so that the best of today is ranked at 100
or A, even if they do not achieve the same high levels that were reached many
years ago. When I was in junior high in 1974, this was a common practice. It has
become even more prevalent since. So we keep hiding and sweeping under the
carpet how little we are teaching and expecting of our kids.
outcome is obvious and could not be ignored. IF it is happening, and it is, then
it can not be by accident. They evidently do not want kids to know much. This
would be most beneficial in making sure there is plenty of unskilled labor to
work cheap for big companies doing meaningless jobs. Further, they will be
ineffective at defending themselves and making their government accountable and
responsive to their needs. It is easier to pull the wool over ignorant people
than it is to do so over educated ones.
is an article that appeared in the
addition to requiring the professor to inflate grades, they also wanted him to
ďdumb downĒ the curriculum so that students could pass. Well, after all, it
is the degree they really want and are paying for. They ought to get something
for all that money they are paying, right? So the university attempted to do
just that. And since the professor wouldnít get on board, they dumped him.
are a number of issues here. First, what good is this professor doing if
everyone else is scaling and reducing the level of the curriculum? I think he
should have obeyed as the rest have. But it concerns me that money is corrupting
our educational process and that could have serious consequences. How would you
like to have a doctor diagnose and operate on you when he really doesnít know
what he is doing? How would you like to work in a building whose designer was
not all that good at engineering because he wasnít required to know as much as
before? How about that jet you fly on? See how it could all come back to haunt
down has been going on for years and is no secret at all. But it represents a
great danger when we no longer require the rigorous knowledge and skill that has
been a part of our past. It could hurt us sooner or later. It can only go so far
before we have to add more years of education or accidents start happening a lot
more until our society collapses due to complete incompetence. The greatest
advantage of insuring that everyone is dumb is that they will not know enough to
be effective citizens who properly make their leaders accountable. The few who
are smart will not be enough to keep the leaders in line. That is where we are
now. But we did not get there overnight.
you leave teaching your kids up to someone else, you might not be getting what
you think you are. You might be robbing your kids of good teaching. It would
sort of be like giving them a diet of empty calories. Before long, they would
suffer from malnutrition and die. Well, if their brains are not properly fed,
they will be useless to them later in life. If you love your kids, you would not
turn them out into life, ignorant, unprepared, and unable to protect themselves.
teaching them yourselves, you might actually be giving them a huge head start
and advantage over all the other kids who are taught by a school system that is
not sincere in teaching them and preparing them for life and is slacking off. If
you love your kids, you will teach them. Teaching is as necessary as love. They
need both and God obligates you to give both.
Perform Much Better
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The results are very obvious. Home Schooled (Home Schooled) kids far outperform their public school peers. Home Schooled are much better behaved, more socially adjusted and balanced. You'll have much more time rather than less. Your time with and relationship with your kids will be more and better. In every way, it is superior as God intended it to be.
I hear talk from some parents who say they don't get much time but when they do, its quality time. That's just crap. From my experience, you can not separate quality time from quantity time. Any time should be mostly with your kids, rather than have strangers handle them. The bonds of affection and trust need constantly refreshed and reinforced. Only quantity time does this. You can never predict when questions and discussions will come up. By spending lots of time with them, you will be sure to hit those important times.
Spending time with your kids, done in love, will boost them and in turn, they will be sure to boost you. It will happen automatically. Kids keep us young and balanced, psychologically and spiritually. Parents and children will continually reinforce and sustain each other, again, as God intended all along.
It makes a big difference in life when you come from a family of love and support. You feel confident. You know you always have help waiting if you need it. Home Schooled will always be excellent performers in life because of their solid foundation from their parents and families.
It is a serious responsibility that God gives us. The biggest problem continually confronting all mankind is to be able to effectively pass on the things needed so that the kids can continue to pass it along. It usually breaks down in 3 generations or less. Raising kids in love is our primary obligation to God. Except for God, Himself, everything else is a far distant 2nd, in comparison with our kids. And here is the payoff. If you raise them well, you have a real merit in the eyes of God. Further, you have accomplished something few manage to ever do. 3rd, there is the big payoff from the kids, themselves. They happiness, their joy, their love, and their success are also yours. You truly have something to be proud of.
One of the saddest commentaries on human society is that life is treated with so little value and concern. AS John put it, if you can not love your brother (or fellow man) who you can see, than you can not claim to love God, who you can not see. It all comes down to love and love of your own little children. If our worship of and devotion to God means anything at all, then we must give our kids the love and devotion that God requires of us to give. All else is meaningless if we fail in this.
I have seen people who devote themselves to the Bible and their church or religion. Some even go door to door. But they often neglect their kids in turn. According to Paul, a man who does not provide for his own (ignores or slights his own) is worse than a man without faith. Such a man has disowned the faith. So our entire faith can hang in the balance. Why some should not want to spend as much time with their kids as possible is a mystery to me.
You get out of life what you put into it.
They Don't Teach . . . but
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Children should never grow up and get caught off guard. They should be well prepared for what to expect and be required to handle once they leave the nest or when they do leave the nest. Of course, there will be some things missed because kids don't pay as much attention when information does not seem relevant. But most of it will stick. Here are some things many parents shelter kids from and should not.
Money and Spending
Another very important thing kids need to learn is how you handle your life. They need to understand money, budgeting, paying bills and expenses, and the like. These are very important and almost always neglected by most parents. As a result, many young people get into serious credit card debt and start out behind the eight ball early in life. You also need to impress upon your kids the need to be responsible by being responsible yourself and making them responsible and accountable for what they do.
The best lesson you can learn comes from the Duggars, a family of now 19 kids on TV. Get out of debt if you are in debt, and if you are not, don't ever get in debt. Set your sights and expectations low and be willing to struggle in the early years or even your whole life. Many recall the days of their youth and the ease their parents might have had, particularly if you are a baby boomer or maybe a Gen-X'er. But most marriages started out with very little. But by the time we reached 5, it had gotten a little better. By the time we came to be 11 or 12 and observe more, things were pretty good.
When many marry, they expect
to have what their parents now have or had when the kid was 12. They should know
that it may never be that way again till God solves all problems when His son
returns to right all wrongs. Those who seek God will almost ceratinly have a
hard time as most work places today are ruthless and brutal. If you are a decent
person who will not harm people, you may actually find yourself unappreciated,
to say the least. Don't ask me how I know that ;-) You live in a wicked world.
For instance, if your kid does
something wrong and offers a poor, lame excuse, do not let them get away with
it. Tell them that is not a good reason and will not be accepted. As they get
older and maybe drink too much when they shouldnít, donít go blaming the
store or friend who might have supplied it, blame your kid and make them solely
accountable as they truly are. If you allow them to place the blame on others,
you are doing them great harm. They need to take responsibility for their own
actions as you do.
If they later engage in sex, donít blame the other person, blame you kid for making a poor choice. It takes two to tango, right? In all things, they need to account for their own actions and decisions. This will make them ready and equipped to give account of themselves to God as He will not let them make poor excuses, either. People will respect and us and our credibility will be high if we are forthcoming with our weaknesses and failures.
People naturally like to dodge
criticism and accusations. But Christians must be willing to face up to their
flaws and failures in order to improve themselves and to please God. God expects
refinement and improvement; in short, progress, be it small and slow or big and
fast. We need to be showing we are growing. Part of Godly devotion is being
humble and admitting our faults.
Talk About Sex
Another topic is sex. From the
time they can talk, you need to show them how to interact with others in a
positive and constructive way. You need to help them understand people and how
to size others up and what to watch out for. You also need to help them try to
figure out who they are. You need to help them find and establish a purpose in
life and goals. If they are certain about who they are and where they are going,
then they will better know who is right for them if they are looking to get
married which invariably they will. And they will be better able to size others
up if you share with them your experience. You also need to be able to do this
yourself or you will be no help to them.
In addition, you also have to
make room for and prepare for the day when puberty and interest in sex arrives.
In fact, curiosity and intrigue about the opposite sex will be in them as soon
as they are born. Donít censor or punish their interest and curiosity. Find
safe acceptable ways they can explore it a little (such as asking questions)
without doing anything serious. I think you ought to check out my article on
lust and the one on porn for a more detailed discussion of this subject.
If you show disapproval and
anger when they show an interest in the opposite sex, you will only force them
to hide that behavior from you but you will not stop it. However, you might
cause them to feel an undue amount of shame and guilt which would not be good or
right. It is only natural and proper that they have an interest in the other
sex. Just make sure they understand Godís requirements and to not violate His
laws in those matters. If they understand that marriage is a good and acceptable
outlet according to God, then allow them an interest and curiosity or they may
seek it out in less desirable circumstances behind your back.
How you react to them about sex
will set the pace for the rest of their youthful years. Also, how you, as
parents, react to each other will also influence their attitude about sex. If
you are very secretive about your sex life and relationship, your kids may take
a cue from you and be secretive themselves. That is not to say you have to rub
it in their face, but you donít have to make it a secret, either. You can
politely excuse yourselves, explaining the you and mom want to be alone and
enjoy each other in private. It they ask more about that, then it will be a good
time to explain a little more. There is nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed
about. It is not wrong, bad, or dirty in the eyes of God, if you are married.
Now many people complain that
they are not having enough sex because the kids are always around and they
canít get any privacy. Well, that is because they are not just talking about
privacy, which is quite easy to get, but also secrecy, which is a lot tougher.
If they would give up worrying about keeping their activities a secret, they
could have a lot more sex. Sex should not be a secret. It is best private, of
But by not being secretive, you
let the kids know without speaking a word, that sex is good and healthy and the
right thing to do if you are married. It also gives them the opportunity to ask
questions and you to answer them as they are bound to wonder what is going on
behind those closed doors that is so private. And what if a child should walk in
on you during sex. No big deal. You can stop and ask them to let you be alone
for a little while. You may also have a little bit of explaining to do. Sex can
look rough or perplexing to a young child so you, particularly mom, may need to
reassure them that mommy likes it and it feels good.
Another benefit of not being
secretive about sex is that you get to have plenty of it. Who cares if the kids
are home. Isnít that what doors are for? Close the doors and do it. And
donít feel guilty about it. Do it just for the fun of it.
Learning Fast is Important
Kids grow up far faster than any parent thinks they do. Our own childhoods seemed long to us. But to our parents it went by like lightning. It will for you, too. So waste no time and get to as much as possible as soon as possible. It might not stick at first by endless repetition and discussion will eventually work its magic. We don't have time as a luxury to take it slow and easy. Life can be cruel and nasty and kids need to know as much about it all as soon as possible. For be forewarned is to be forearmed.
The biggest problem I see with discipline is that it is often overdone as much or more than underdone. Both extremes are wrong. First, the world has a powerful influence on our kids, whether we like it or not. The world does not have a problem with many things God strongly objects to. Your kids will play with other kids and attitudes will rub off some. Paul says we do not avoid associations with everyone who commits sin, but only brothers who commit sin without regret. You can not hide kids from the world.
Instead, you must prepare them to face the world for as Jesus said to his followers, "Satan has demanded to have you all to sift as wheat." We will all be tested to our limits. Our kids must be prepared for that. Many will try to shelter their kids from everything. This might be worse than no shelter at all. To be caught by surprise can often lead to failure. We never want to have our kids caught off guard or taken by surprise. They need to be ready to face things that will be challenging. If you let them explore a little and they begin to have problems, then you have a chance to see the exact problem and try to correct it. You get a chance to try again.
But if the problem is not known and not found out, it could end up in a very big mess when they and you find out too late and can not correct the matter than went too far. Keeping communication open is vital. Many parents feel they have to be strict disciplinarians. Not so! You are there to instruct, guide, assist, primarily! AS a back up, there may need to be some correction of an appropriate manner. But if you over-react all the time, they will just get good at hiding it all from you. I have an example of what I speak of.
This little article appeared in
the Star, a weekly magazine/paper, dated Dec. 22, 1998, entitled ďNicole
Kidman: How I talked myself out of doing drugs.Ē
She admitted that she was a bit
of a wild child in her teen and early adult years but actually settled down and
stopped drugs later. She said that she told her mother everything as she grew
up. Her parents obviously had an open relationship with her. They did not
imagine that they could control her so why not at least keep the lines of
communication open. I agree.
She also recalled how her
father would take her to modern ballet recitals as a pre-teen. The men danced
naked at this recital. Her father evidently felt comfortable allowing his
daughter to satisfy her curiosity and intrigue in a controlled way so she would
not have to go and find out for herself in less desirable circumstances. Nicole
says ďBut as a result of all that, I can call him at 3 in the morning and tell
Nicole knew she could always
be herself and not hide that from mom and dad. Dad did not have fear that
his daughter would become a stark raving whore over night. He understood the
excitement and appeal that the opposite sex would and did hold for his daughter
and saw no harm in allowing a certain amount of that interest to be satisfied
and put to rest. And for Nicole, she knew she could have an interest without
censorship and disapproval from dad. This is a big step on the part of both the
parents and the child. Accepting a childís curiosity and interest is vitally
important if a bond of trust and openness is to continue.
Keeping lines of communication open can allow the opportunity for children to come back to God at a later age, should they rebel for a time in youth as is often the case. I donít say to let them sin under your roof while living at home. At home they should obey. But if they leave, allow them to leave on good terms, maintaining as close a relationship with you as possible. How open or relaxed you are is your business, but to me, the most sensible thing is to be able to communicate and reason with them, calmly, rationally, reasonably, without anger, hysteria or other foolish reactions.
Teach By Example
This is the best and primary
way we can reach and teach our kids; by example. There is a lot more weight to
our words when they are reinforced by actions in harmony with those words. For
instance, we have already discussed this in regards to sex. If you act with
shame or secrecy, then so will they. They are not blind or stupid and they are
very observant. More so than you may ever realize.
When kids come to you with
complaints about each other, you need to take the time and make a careful
informed judgment, being careful to listen to both or all sides. Then after
careful consideration, you can render your judgment. I have seen too many
parents who got annoyed with the problems brought to them and they just punished
everyone for being a nuisance to them. The kids will see that and think poorly
of your attitude toward them. If there is a guilty party, punish him and him
alone. If justice and righteousness always seem to matter to you, then that will
rub off on them.
Never try to pacify them by
telling them something at the moment and then not honoring it later. You must
say what you mean and do what you say. For example, if you tell them to come in
because it is dark and they donít want to, donít tell them that you will do
this or that if they come in now unless you plan to honor and live up to it.
Your word is your bond of
trust. If you do not live up to your word, your kids will lose faith and trust
in you. That will cost you later so donít do it. Always say what you mean.
Teaching Self Sacrifice and Sharing
Teaching Self Sacrifice and Sharing
Altruism is the idea of
sharing, sacrificing, doing things on behalf of others. It is best taught by
example as all things are. But in addition, one has to be careful not to feel
that they must cater to and satisfy every possible whim of a child and never let
them suffer for want of anything. Every child needs to learn how to go without
some things and to prioritize. We have all needed to learn that we canít have
everything we want. The child must learn this lesson by experience.
They need to be encouraged to
share with their friends and family alike. Selfishness needs to be worked on.
They need to understand how being selfish will hurt them in life. You need to be
able to explain the many ways in life that it can hurt and the Bibleís counsel
to be unselfish. There are times when they may see some stupid little thing at
the store and you have to be able to tell them no to frivolous things. They need
to appreciate the need for self discipline or they will later develop bad
spending habits and the problems with going without some things.
If a child does not have some
limits set for them, they will not see any limits when they get older. We need
to help them realize what they can realistically expect out of life. If we give
them false high expectations, they are going to be bitterly disappointed later
and have trouble coping with life. It will be tough in youth to learn this but
not nearly as tough as it is to find it out later the harder way.
Self sacrifice will never come
easy. It has to be taught. It is not automatic. We can not always have our way
and that is a critical lesson to learn in life that many never do learn and
suffer a lot as a result.
Avoiding the Automatic No
Never say no unless it is
absolutely necessary. If you can possibly allow something, then do it. It will
have an effect on their trust and confidence in you. They know you will give
careful thought to any request and allow it if possible. They will come to
believe that when you do say no, it must be important. And always give reasons.
I remember one mother when I
was in my late 20ís. Her daughter asked her if she could go to the back of the
boat of a friend we were on with. The mother, like usual, automatically replied
no. But her husband looked at her and asked why. She looked puzzled and even
mystified as if coming out of a trance and exclaimed in a kind of stutter
almost, ďAh, I donít know, ah, I guess so, OK, go ahead.Ē But you could
tell, she had never given it any thought. The no was automatic and instinctive.
Lots of problems later developed with the girl as you might imagine.
If there is no reason to say no
then donít. You donít like it when the boss says no for no reason, do you?
Well, the same applies to your kid. No without a reason, sucks, period.
Authority is not a reason so donít use it too often.
Always Have a Reason
Never should anything be
required or demanded without a good and reasonable explanation. To command that
they do so because you said so or because youíre the boss/parent is not
entirely right. That is known as employing authoritarianism. Do it because I am
an authority. Authority is not a reason and never has been, unless you are God.
But even He has reasons if we care to explore and search them out. And He has
often given reasons as well. He has never been afraid to answer a challenge or
be questioned by His servants or even Satan, in the book of Job, and elsewhere.
Always take the time to explain
and help them to understand why it is the right thing to do. If you donít,
then the first time they are out of your sight and control, they will disregard
and disobey you. But if they have a good reason as to why, then they are more
apt to obey you, even when you arenít around.
One must be very patient in
order to take the time to explain, dish out justice, not react before hearing
them out, or any number of other things. It requires that you have good self
control and discipline yourself. The Bible says to be slow to speak, slow to
act, but very quick to listen. If the kids see the word of God at work in you,
they are apt to apply it in their lives, too. There is nothing quite like
leading by example as I have pointed out earlier.
Being Realistic About Expectations
Your kids may sometimes seem
like they are not listening or applying your words. Be patient. As kids, they
may be inclined to not take it as seriously as you would like. But it is a
mistake to think you are not getting to them. The Bible (Proverbs 22:15) says
ďFoolishness is bound in the heart of a child.Ē They may even rebel in a big
way in their teens. But fear not. If you have laid a good foundation, then they
will likely come back to it sooner or later. They will not forget just as the
Bible says (Proverbs 22:6) Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he
is old he will not depart from it.
They may play around sexually
or otherwise when they go to college or strike out on their own. Hormones can
make idiots of us all. And there is a big world of temptation out there and the
world has a powerful influence just the same. So we may lose out temporarily.
But as they get older, and
start to lose some of their looks and begin to realize that time is running out
if they want to get serious and settle down, then they will come back to yours
and Godís good sense. And if they get pregnant or get someone else pregnant
and have to start thinking about caring for a child, then they will get real
sober real fast. I have seen it many times. There are other things that can
happen in life that will get them to think. Your words will then come up into
their hearts and help them to finally think sensibly if you have thought and
So it requires a sort of long term thinking and outlook, what the Bible calls long suffering, and is related to patience. Its seeing the big overall picture. Youth is a difficult time for any of us. You remember, donít you?
But do not take this as an excuse to let your kids sleep around in college. Ultimately, parents are obligated to help find mates for their kids as soon as they develop their secondary sexual characteristics. That might be at 15. It might happen at 12. But when it does happen, you need to act. Problem is, the government wants your kids from cradle to at least 24 or so. So they say you should keep your kids single and wait till after their education to get married or whatever. So you foolishly delay marriage and sexual satisfaction in the way God prescribes, in favor of the devil's preferred way, which way he knows, your kids will never hold out that long to get "laid."
God made the drive and desire for sex far too powerful to be delayed. You prefer to ignore God and yet call yourselves Christians. Stop telling God to go to hell, and start enabling your kids to marry when the urges take hold. This is how you prevent fornication and loose conduct. I got a whole big article on this subject alone.
Keep the Big Picture in Their View at all times.
Never let them lose sight of the ultimate goals of pleasing God, reading the
Bible, obeying God, helping others, and making it into God's Kingdom. We must at
times suffer and be denied in our lives in order to make the ultimate goal. Its
easy to lose sight of.
Never let them lose sight of the ultimate goals of pleasing God, reading the Bible, obeying God, helping others, and making it into God's Kingdom. We must at times suffer and be denied in our lives in order to make the ultimate goal. Its easy to lose sight of.
Lots of Love and Affection
Being close, cuddling, warmth, patience, lots of talking, playing and related things are important. Time put in up front early in life will pay off big time later. If things are not done right early, then problems will be many later. The present always seems like effort but it actually cuts down much more effort later. A close bind of affection will overcome and avoid many problems. I can guarantee this one!
With these simple but practical
things in mind you will do well. No, its true, you will not be perfect just as
the rest of us are not. But you will likely do well enough to get over the hump
and help your children live in harmony with Godís rules as you try to do.
You must realize that many
Christians apply few, if any of these basic rules and that is why they fail so
badly at times, and quite frequently. Most do not apply themselves to Godís
word, never mind their kids. You have to get yourself together before you can
get your kids together as I have stressed numerous times. But the rewards are
worth it if you do.
There is nothing more bitter
and painful than to look back at life with many regrets and too much wasted
time. So donít ignore this. Do it and you will reap great rewards. For
starters, you will be able to approach God with a clean conscience and heart and
be able to give a reasonable accounting of yourself to Him. And you can look
forward to a better world and life where it will not be the great struggle and
challenge that it is at present.
Parents Over ALL
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I added this after initially reinstalling this article above after it was lost or destroyed back maybe around 2002 or so.
It is God who designed the chain of command and structure of human reproduction. With Israel, God appointed land to each tribe and family, so that all people and families would have land to live off of. God considered it a right and necessity for each man to have his own land to support him and his family. An inherited right!!! A far cry from today's world, no? In doing this, God insured that each new family would automatically have their own means of living and sustenance.
But along with this land, children would need many different skills in order to survive and thrive. These would necessarily need to come from the parents. They are the ones who train and prepare their little darlings to be, over time, competent and complete. But this completeness is not fully obtained as soon as they marry. The parents remain there to add further help and lessons, as those lessons become needed when the situation arrives. As well, grandparents and the community (something usually missing today) were also there to lend and hand and help as a couple being their journey together and begin to have kids and care for them.
We are sadly missing a good deal of what God intended and instructed. And we suffer as a result. But there is still much we can do to please God and raise good kids. Now as well, kids were completely dependent upon the parents for all things. Food, shelter, instruction, play, love and affection; everything! This was as God intended. The bonds between parents and children would become very strong. Being the source of all security and life, there would be a necessary dependence of the children upon the parents.
The parents would also be responsible for providing land and their sons and their sons' families. As well, it was the parents who would have to purchase a wife for the son, or receive compensation for giving their daughters as wives to other men. Parents would help the son or daughter to make a good decision in selecting or accepting a mate. And once marriages were in place, the parents could continue to help till the day they died.
As well, and not to be overlooked, parents, in their old age, will need their kids to help them and care for them. And children are also obligated by God to honor and care for their parents in their old age. The street runs both ways. Parents and their offspring each have a life long duty to each other. Neither abandons the other just because of age of some sort. Family is family for life. And communities are communities for life. We can not neglect our neighbors, or family.
We do not exist as separate independent units, completely isolated from other units. The world would have us believe that we are rugged individualists and independent, but that is a myth and a lie. We owe our fellow man and our families and they owe us. United we stand, divided we fall. Or as one boss once said, we either hang together, or we hang separately. The world emphasizes individuality and there is a place for that, but it does not want us joined to a larger body of people and networks except those approved of and controlled by the world. Do not be like the world or the things in it. No man is an island.
Today, the law says we owe kids nothing and that the kids must earn all things themselves before having them. They must buy their own land or house, find their own jobs, and sell themselves into long term debt (a form of slavery) in order to afford a brutal mortgage of 30 years or more and absurd levels of interest, amounting to 2, 3, or 4 times the price they "bought" the house for, if they can even get a loan. God never intended anything as unfair and cruel as all this upon a couple just starting out. It is truly evil what is done to new families.
But I want to draw particular attention to this fact. Though the world says our kids are on their own and are not men or successful unless they can make it on their own, even though the game is totally rigged so that you can not win or succeed unless you sell your soul to the system and compromise your morals and integrity and go along with hideous things; that does not mean that God absolves parents of their duties to their kids. God's requirements still stand. It is the duty of parents to do as much as possible to help their kids get established and stay afloat. This responsibility to the next generation belongs to the parents for life.
I have heard many parents completely deny any further obligations, once the child is now 18. This is not from God and God will judge all such abdication of responsibility with extreme judgment. I am just warning you all and cleansing my hands of blood guilt, since I know what the laws of God really are. My hands are now clean. Parents might be able to help their kids get jobs. They should be doing al they can to help their kids find proper mates to marry. Whatever the parents can do to help, they should and must. They might not be able to help as much as they would like, but what is within their grasp, they must do. A child is yours forever, not just 18 years. We all have a responsibility to the next generation and to all fellow human beings.
This extreme and complete dependence was intended by God to prevent "thieves" and "wolves" from coming along and undoing what the parents taught or from disturbing the bonds of trust and reliance upon the parents. God better understood than we, that there would be those who would seek to mislead kids, even as the devil pretty much misled a child in Eve, newly created when deceived. Then as the child grows and gets stronger in their own powers of perception and reason, they might slowly gain confidence and courage in their own ability to analyze and reason for themselves, after having been carefully guided for years previous, to reach this point.
If raised right, kids develop very strong bonds of love, trust, and yes, reliance, too, for as I said, they will still need parents and a community to continue to share the collective accumulated knowledge of the family, community, tribe, and even nation. AS children completely rely on the parents for their shelter, food, clothing, living skills, manners, expectations, laws, knowledge, and all the rest. It was all to come, primarily, from the parents. This would be the way to best safeguard and preserve all things accumulated over many centuries of experience.
If the parents let others care for these many responsibilities, then the kids see many different and competing sources and may not rely on the parents or will have more reason to perhaps doubt the parents, since there is less to lose and other options to seek.
Now Satan is no fool or dummy. He knows this arrangement well and so do his followers, those wonderful social engineers who seek to break down and steal our kids from us. Satan seeks to feed the kids 2 meals a day in school, in many places. He puts his own teachers in place in his schools in order to condition and regiment the kids to think and serve his "interests" rather than those of the parents and God, Satan's ultimate enemy.
A child is indeed, a gift from God, but also a
very serious responsibility, for which God will demand a serious accounting for.
For while those kids are placed in our care and said to be our own, they, like
us, all ultimately belong to God. So we need to be the source of all sustenance
and teaching, so that our children (RSV, 2 Timothy 317) ďmay be
complete, equipped for every good work.Ē
Peer Pressure on
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Peer pressure is a natural force put in place by God. We need to get along in groups and its only natural to want to fit in. Cooperation is a good thing. But with the fall of Adam and Eve, peer pressure can also be a deadly weapon and none has used that weapon more effectively than the devil. When kids are young, they can be very sensitive and easily misled by peers and peer pressure. They need to have a solid foundation underneath them before they face peer pressure alone. They need to learn principles and God's laws. They need strength and independence. They can not afford to be fearful of standing out or standing up to evil. So parents need to be cautious and careful about peers of their children, but also want to guard against being overly protective. Allow friends over so that they can be observed and controlled if necessary.
While being strong and not afraid to speak up, it will have to be balanced with being reasonable, fair, conciliatory. Jesus said "blessed are the peacemakers," among others. Many Christians do not like their kids hanging around "bad" kids and bad influences. My only concern is what they call bad. I recall one brat of a Christian family, which brat was disrespectful, arrogant, and stole things. But his parents did not want him hanging around two other boys because they used bad words. Compared to the brat, they were saints. Small things hardly matter at young ages. But if the parents spend adequate time with kids, their need for other kids will not be quite a great.
But having other ids play with them is actually an advantage. They will meet lots of questionable people in the work place in time. So they will need some practice with kids their own age as well. Good education, lots of love, and other such reinforcement will help them to be able to cope with questionable "peers." Don't be overly righteous says Solomon.
16 Be not righteous overmuch, and do not make yourself overwise; why should you destroy yourself?
17 Be not wicked overmuch, neither be a fool; why should you die before your time?
One extreme is as bad as the other. Being too righteous and too wise is not healthy or practical. If we try to be too holy and righteous, we will fail. This is one of the most important and yet most neglected principles in the Bible. To have our kids avoid any and all neighbors and others will bring harm as I see it. I have seen it many times before. But to just let them play unobserved or too often could also invite problems. Balance is always nice, is it not?
Kids will need tact and diplomacy in the world. But they need courage, strength, and resolve as well. Help your kids to learn a healthy balance between standing for righteousness and principle and yet being considerate, tactful, respectful and reasonable in all things. As Jesus put it, as far as it is possible with you, be reasonable with all peoples. Kids will not master those skills without exposure and practice. They need some peer reaction.
But where the world and schools fail is in recognizing that peers should contain a variety of ages and circumstances and in normal everyday circumstances. A school classroom where everyone is the same age and you and kids in general are not kept in line, is not natural or healthy. With educating your own kids, you can control the circumstances so that nothing gets out of hand or neglected. You can choose the curriculum, time, place and most other circumstances. That is how it should be.
A Brave New World
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Yes, I am being sarcastic. A harsh cruel world might be more apt. But this new world is one with far less around to help parents and much to make their job difficult at best and often damn near impossible. But God did leave us with just a little bit of room to pull it off. But it will require a great deal of effort, as it does in any war and we certainly are in the midst of a war now in the time of the end.
Because we have so much less, in that we do not have land given to us, nor a means of self support and are completely dependant upon employers for a living, our hands are tied in many respects. And since the devil has been clever enough to create a system whereby most of our time is spent working for very little wages and very high prices, we will have little time to do many things we would like to do for ourselves. For a fact, there is so much technology that requires quite a bit of knowledge and continual use in order to be effective that there are many things we would not and could not have time for.
At the same time, we can not make too many excuses for ourselves. There is much we can learn and pick up from. We can prioritize and pick the most important things we can do for ourselves and then leave what is left to others. There are some things we can not let others or or should not let others do. God requires that we do them. Teaching our kids is one of those things we must do and it is not rocket science or brain surgery, either. But I am going to suggest a few things that might really help save a lot of money and be much more effective than letting others do these.
I believe we are foolish to leave healthcare up to doctors and insurance. Medicine has long been in the control of governments and big business and with far less than pure motives and diligence. In fact, the Medical establishment, dare I say, Cartel or Cabal, or even Complex or Union, has every appearance, in my eyes, of perhaps trying to actually harm us. To leave something as important as our health in the hands of others, seems quite absurd to me. There is lots of info out there and, since medical costs are one of our greatest burdens, this is where we would save the most by learning all we can about health, diet, and safety and caring for those matters for ourselves. And it is also my conviction that we could obtain far better care ourselves and cure things that the establishment says there is no cure for, and at a mere fraction of the price that we would pay others to do such.
Another area that I do not believe we can afford to be completely ignorant of, is law. You would be surprised at how easy it is to learn the basics of law research, for the cost of a small inexpensive book and a little time spent at a legal library. And once you know your way around, some important areas to explore might be land and property law basics, employment law, basics of criminal law, marriage law and other such things that we are all apt to need sooner or later or as you become in need of those. But I do recommend at the least, since we all depend upon employers, to learn employment law for most employers today are not law abiding at all. Knowing this law ahead of time could help you avoid mistakes and avoid trusting too much and knowing what to do before hand.
As well, you can end up in many thousands of dollars in debt, even for being innocent, if you rely on a lawyer. It is often better to represent yourself, which you have a right to do. But you should know what to do before hand so that you are not caught off guard or in a situation where you can not do legal research such as being arrested.
There are some basics of car repair but as well, many apartments do not allow you to fix a car in your parking lot or drive way and some towns have zoning laws that do not let you work on your own car. As well, cars can require a number of specialized tools and equipment for which you may have to seek out a mechanic. But f you have tools and a place to keep them and the legal right to fix them, anything you can do yourself will certainly save you lots of money.
Some home repair is much more within our reach and could help. There are many things you might do for yourself, with the help of your kids and family. What you tackle and what you do not, will have to be your decision. But I notice a few things among the Amish you might want to consider.
The Amish have found that many things produced by stores are far cheaper than what the Amish can produce the same for, for themselves. Clothing is one of those. They do not make us much now. They often buy it at stores or mail order. Yes, you might make some of your own food. But it might be just as well to buy food and put your efforts toward things that will save more or make more in the long run. Sometimes the easiest things we could do are also the least time or money-saving things. Setting priorities and carefully calculating things will hopefully guide your decisions.
We have been lulled into having everything done for us. Someone else takes out our trash, kills and slaughters for our meat, saving us the gruesome task. Law Enforcement takes care of all our policy and enforcement needs. A law system does the judging. The odd thing is that most of those were assigned to us to do. We are supposed to handle law enforcement for our community, if we had one. The older men of the community were to judge locally. We should take care of our won trash and not have somebody else do it. In times previous to modern plumbing, slaves, servants or poorly paid workers would clean out the out-houses of the wealthy. We should all be handling our own dirty messes.
But having others do more undesirable work appeals to many. We have become very lazy and not very independent or self-sufficient. This is as the devil wanted.
But as much as possible, we want to be self-sufficient, independent, and not have to rely on others. But as well, maybe you can trade skills with others so that at least you do not have to rely businesses who love to pad bills and make you pay for their expense of land, buildings, and equipment when you don't need all that to change a tire. Those who learn to teach themselves and do things for themselves will be much more resistant to harm and abuse from unprincipled businesses.
Is Vital to Survival
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I am going to assert what has come to be my view of things here.
We are directly accountable to God for knowing His word, the Bible and all that is required in the Bible. We can not leave this serious obligation and responsibility to others. Ignorance will not be excused by God. We must know it for ourselves. We can not leave it in the care of a priest, minister, pastor, reverend, evangelist, or any other kind of clergyman or church leader. Too may of them do not serve God. They have been bought out and their loyalty turned over to government and big business who encourage them to fight wars and often kill those who call themselves Christians. They encourage us to vote certain ways, give money, and support this or that, that conflicts with God's real interests.
It is our greatest duty to God to know and worship Him with our own faculties, our own minds, hearts, souls, and our own strength, diligence, and vigilance. We can only slight God when we do not use our own abilities, which abilities reflect those of God, even as we are made in His image. We must protect ourselves by not relying on going along with the crowd and standing up to wrong whenever we recognize it, and if need be stand against the crowd, even if it means rejection and harm, eve as it did for Jesus. I believe that independence is the most important quality that a Christian must possess.
Christians do not care about politics or fitting in with the crowd, or making everyone happy, not rocking the boat. Satan and his earthly minions, his servants among men, have sought to create a world and society that encourages us to not think and just go along with what is dictated by government, employers, the media, schools and the like. We are not supposed to make waves, speak out differently, or cause "trouble" by disagreeing. Many religions and church have gone right along with the sons of darkness, the world at large.
But as James says (RSV, James 4:4) ďUnfaithful creatures! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.Ē
With friends like the world, who needs enemies, right? We don't need to be friends with everyone or have everyone like us. We can go against the political and religious grain and serve God as best as we can understand Him with our own brains. God is looking for those who stand up and stand out from the goats, the weeds, and shine like sons of light do. So not only do we need to teach our own kids, but we need to teach ourselves as well, by knowing the Bible directly, and not take anyone's word for it in any way.
I notice that many who call themselves Christians will often belong to churches that do not entirely match up with their own beliefs. But they feel like they can not go it alone. It is not always necessary to agree entirely with a church but neither is it good to compromise on serious issues. We all want to belong and get along. We all seek to please peers to some degree. But the devil knows our tendencies this way and he has created a vast variety of clubs, groups, associations and other things to belong to, in order to try to gain a fair amount of influence and control over us. Just as our kids can be overly vulnerable to peer pressure, so can we.
So we need to be on guard against those who try to get us to compromise, not just once but many times throughout our lives. Independence is essential for Christians.
for those just beginning such a way, obviously, you can not make it all up now
or fast. But you can start and your kids can pick up where you leave off and
carry it all further. You can all learn together and be a happy healthy family
who independently serve our God, who is certainly worthy of our love and
devotion with all our heart and soul.
Taylor Gatto site and book
Marrying Early IS Important!
|Neutrality and War
The Importance of the Individual Christian Conscience
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