Created Tues, Mar. 12, 2002            Updated   May 17, 2013

Marrying Young IS Important  . . .    and natural, as God intended it to be!

1 Timothy 5:
14 Therefore, I desire the young women to marry, to bear children, to rule the house, giving no occasion to the adversary on account of reproach. 
15 For some already have turned aside behind Satan.

Sub-headings:  53 of them !
Marriage Is Vitally Important
Newspaper: 9 of 10 Have Premarital Sex
The World Has Changed
Tertullian's Age Requirements
Clement of Alexandria's Age Requirements
Justinian's Age Requirements
Notable Young Marriages
Why the Change?
What is adulthood and maturity?
Inconsistent Legal Definitions
Accountability Vital to a Healthy Society
Biblical Accountability Among Children
Why Minors Need to be Accountable
Children Used to Do and Be a Lot More
Our "Sentimentality" Toward Children
Isolate and Brain Wash
Learning Needed Early & Fast
Our Hang-ups Hinder Us
Parents Are Neglectful of Duties
The Problems of New Behavior
Kids Are Very Capable
An Inequitable System
Don't Grow Up, You Say?
Don't Make Them Grow Up So Fast
Nature Is Calling!
What Do We Do?
Youth IS Beauty at its best!
Beauty Is THE Drug!
Are We to Blame?
Making Peace with God and Decency
So What About Maturity?
Age Prejudice
Older People Are a Valuable Asset
Children Need Play From Adults
One Way Accountability
Not Like It Used To Be
Know Yourself Well
A Few More Things To Consider
The Failure Rate
Civil Liberties at Stake
Where Is the Line Drawn?
Youthful Looks Endear
A Brief Window of Time
Child Raising Easier in Youth
Putting Off Childbirth   May 17, 2013
The Dread of Younger Women
I'm Not Done Yet
Why It Might Be Good To Wait
Could Parents Do More?
Advice to Think About
The Bottom Line
Recent Additions to Consider
The Basic 45 Facts as They Truly Are

Related Articles

In American society today, pre-marital or non-marital sex is much on the rise. Sex and sexual promiscuity are everywhere around us. The media are saturated with it. Many parents are having more trouble trying to control their kids and stop them from engaging in sexual behavior. And this is a recent change of perhaps the last 45 years, half a lifetime of just one generation, primarily that of those we call in the USA, the Baby Boomers, born from 1947 to 1964. Today's kids do not have the same guilt, complexes, and hang-ups that previous generations had due to the unhealthy influence of Victorianism and Comstock/FBI "interest" in our sexual activities, which I cover in other articles and give recommended readings for at the end of this article. And it is good they have got rid of the hang-ups. But they have gone much further than that. They have tossed all moral sense out the window. This is not good. It has been very destructive though we have failed to realize it.

But of even greater concern may be, not just the sexual morality aspects, but the reasons why government so zealously enforces artificial age accountability and "child protection" while ignoring parental rights and allowing kids to suffer due to parents being poorly paid and treated by our system in general, causing great suffering to the young. There is a very sinister motive behind the so called concern for our so called "kids" and their protection. It begs a much closer inspection.

As well, it was God who intended marriage to take place at a reasonable proper time and Christians have left the ways of God far behind, and caused the young adult we call teens, to suffer greatly for it. We have allowed social manipulators to dictate what is supposedly good for us but really only good for those who want to use us all and influence our young to think in ways beneficial to those who want to use us all and alienate us from the ways of God.

I am going to address the many issues in this article, primarily from the standpoint of teen girls who are the object of most lawful and legal protection from any rights they have as to choice and behavior. Teen girls also cause the most serious and hysterical reactions from parents. Anything written about teen girls also applies to teen boys, though not specifically stated in most cases.

But as I point out in my abortion article, calm heads need to prevail for very good reasons. Emotions cloud our judgment and distort our good sense of reasoning. And who had better reason to get irrational and over react than Abraham, when God asked him to sacrifice Isaac after God made promises about Isaac. Abraham did not react but accepted the will of God without question or reaction. So we need to leave the emotions at the door here. I have said this later in the article as well.

I summarize this entire article at the end in short statements, 45 of them in all, that you can use for review if you like.

Parents have been grossly deficient in recognizing the many problems that have come about, and missed their many obligations to God to "provide" in all ways for their children. In fact, they provide for practically none. Teens forsaking the commands of God will certainly keep them out of God's kingdom. But, since parents have been entrusted with teaching and warning their kids of the obligations to obey God's laws in order to preserve their lives and enter into God's kingdom, God may make the parents also accountable for their kids forsaking God's laws, if the parents did not adequately teach and warn their children as God commanded them to. Being a parent definitely has many responsibilities and God will not make light of those. You have to show adequate effort or God will not excuse you.

We might let our kids off the hook for not growing up and accepting responsibility and accountability but God will not let them or us off the hook for not growing up and accepting responsibility and accountability. Yet, this area had been the greatest shortcoming of Christians, if ever there was one. We have failed miserably. And now I have opened my big mouth in order to relieve myself of blood guilt, by warning you of your failure. You can no longer claim ignorance to your duties to God. You have been served good notice! Give this article good careful attention for willful ignorance will not be excused. If you run and hide from it, you will not also be able to run and hide from God. Adam and Eve tried that and it did not work then and will not ever work.

And it must also be pointed out that we have been much of the cause of our own suffering and that of our kids for not giving ourselves more over to the study of God and His Bible. We have allowed all our rights and privileges to be taken from us so that the government seems to own our kids and have more rights and prerogatives with them than we do, and says they know better than parents what is best for kids. In a well intentioned government, constitution, and proper boundaries of law and enforcement, The parents should have all rights and ownership of their kids with the law and community only stepping in, in the case of very serious physical abuse.

As it stands today, kids can be taken from parents, not for any real abuse but only if the government decides that each child should be entitled to minimum standards that are set quite high and discriminate against the poor, weak, and defenseless. Or perhaps the government might not like what you teach and decide you are not good for your kids. In fact, some have had kids taken away, even after charges were proved entirely false, using requirements that are not lawful or reasonable but are enforced upon the poor and weak, who have none to help them. Such circumstances make having kids very difficult. The day will come when Jesus' words will come true when he says, Woe to those giving suck to a child in those days! Those days are here now because we have all been long asleep as our rights were all taken away from us. Indeed, the scriptures are proved true when they say, Indeed, what a man sows, he will reap.

The world has chosen, for sinister motivations, to call our youths who have reached physical sexual maturity, "kids" or "children." But God and Nature have declared by virtue of their newly developed outward sexual features as well as their newly found interest and desire in the opposite sex, that they are ready to marry and more important, need to marry urgently for their urges are very powerful and overwhelming and will not be denied or delayed for very long. They must be accommodated in these needs to marry and breed. But we have broken away from God and Nature and ignored these real needs.

As well, those above us seek to isolate our kids so that only the government schools will have time and opportunity to teach the kids as they would like. They do not want any other sources influencing the kids. Now who is most likely to influence young women of say 13-17? Why younger men of those ages and maybe 15 or 20 years beyond them. These adult men represent a great threat to the desired isolation of the "girls." So laws have been made for forbid any sort of contact or interaction with the young. In fact, such a stigma has been created so as to make a young man (15-35 at least) look downright sinister and evil for even the slightest concern for a young women. This serves to isolate children.

Added to this is that parents both have to work to afford the kids. So the kids have others care for them in day care till they are of school age. And any extra activities will likely involve lessons or other activities controlled by adults who are not the parents and are generally approved by the status quo. The kids have had an invisible barrier erected all around them so that none may approach or befriend for any reason at all, without being immediately labeled a monster and pervert. Now the world rulers can do as they please with our kids. Were we to do what they do, we would be hunted down like dogs. But they can do it and no ones says a thing. Amazing, no?

To make matters worse, when time comes to marry and breed, the governments say our kids need far more education and make laws to prevent them from working so as to be able to support themselves and a family and make the kids stay in school for 4 or 5 years more than they should. so our kids are denied by the governments and us, their parents. Its very disturbing and not what God wanted.

Our time has nearly run out and only the fittest will survive into God's kingdom. If you are going to be one of those, you must put forth a lot of effort fast or experience the consequences that go with ignorance of God's Laws and commands.

With that, I will now address the arguments and reasons in defense of what I have declared-summarized in my 45 Assertion of Facts! at the end of this article.

Marriage Is Vitally Important
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Now due to my faith in the Bible as the word of God and it showing the best way for us to live, I believe marriage is the best way to satisfy our God-given sexual desires and the only way as well. But if God requires us to be married to have sex, what do we say to kids, more specifically, pubescent teens! The Apostle Paul had this to say about sex, temptation, and marriage.

1 Corinthians 7:
2 "But because of the temptation to immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.
3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband."

It seems that marriage is not just for having children, but is also a means to satisfy our sexual urges in a proper way. Having a wife or husband is a protection from temptation, by the husband and wife serving as outlets for each other.
How important is it to avoid fornication and illicit sexual activity? Below is an account where some Jews who became Christians were telling the Gentiles, the non-Jews, that they must keep the law. This was not true. But the Providence and spirit of God brought everyone together to settle this once and for all. The ritual ordinances of the law were no longer binding, such as circumcision or the Sabbath. On the other hand, they thought, by the spirit of God upon them, that there were 4 things they were likely to have to deal with that must not be done. There are a number of laws that incur the death penalty but many of these were not mentioned. of the 4 that were, Fornication is one of those 4 biggest concerns, above and beyond nearly all others.

(RSV) Acts 15:
22 Then it seemed good to the apostles and the elders, with the whole church, to choose men from among them and send them to Antioch with Paul and Barnabas. They sent Judas called Barsabbas, and Silas, leading men among the brethren,
23 with the following letter: "The brethren, both the apostles and the elders, to the brethren who are of the Gentiles in Antioch and Syria and Cilicia , greeting.
24 Since we have heard that some persons from us have troubled you with words, unsettling your minds, although we gave them no instructions,
25 it has seemed good to us, having come to one accord, to choose men and send them to you with our beloved Barnabas and Paul,
26 men who have risked their lives for the sake of our Lord Jesus Christ.
27 We have therefore sent Judas and Silas, who themselves will tell you the same things by word of mouth.
28 For it has seemed good to the Holy Spirit and to us to lay upon you no greater burden than these necessary things:

29 that you abstain from what has been sacrificed to idols and from blood and from what is strangled and from unchastity. If you keep yourselves from these, you will do well. Farewell."

Alternatively from (GLT)
29 To hold back from idol sacrifices, and blood, and that strangled, and from fornication; from which continually keeping yourselves, you will do well. Be prospered.

Of all the things to be concerned of as Christians, none are more important than not having sex unless you are married. But today, most only care about getting a good job and living in a nice house and living the middle class dream, which the devil has made very difficult to get anymore. Most Christians kids fall prey to sex outside of marriage, sometimes long before actually marrying. Our priorities seem to be much different than those of God.

Paul warns us in Hebrews 13:
(RSV)           4 Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled; for God will judge the immoral and adulterous.
(Weymouth) 4 Let marriage be held in honour among all, and let the marriage bed be unpolluted; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge.

Make no mistake about it! God will judge those who do not obey Him, especially when it comes to sex. Do it His way or die. It really is that simple. Yet we ignore that and give much more attention to the concerns of men and money, who do not care if we fornicate and might actually prefer that we fornicate, as long as we learn to be obedient to them through a good brain washing and indoctrination, . . .  I mean, education, so that we are allowed a good paying job . . . maybe.

But in a perfect example of straining out the gnats while gulping down camels, absolute hypocrisy, we don't seem that upset about fornication. Good jobs are nice houses seem to be the only things that matter in life to these phony Christians. But as Jesus said in Mark:

(KJV) Mark 8:
36 For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?

Will having a nice house get you into the Kingdom of God? I think not! Will a good job do it? Not hardly! Will impressing everyone with a high status job get you there? No way! You just can not have indiscriminate non-marital sex and please God, too. But really, unless the parents extend themselves to enable teens to somehow marry as soon as possible, they might very well lose their kids to immoral behavior, which is so common and so easy to obtain in our times and most accept such behavior as no big deal. Why, everyone is doing it! That is true, bt it does not take away the seriousness of this issue. But since your kids are going to be influenced by these attitudes, you must take great care to not let them fall for this line of reasoning and you must help them find proper and reasonable ways to marry and remain faithful to God's laws. You are the parents and you must lay up for your children.

(GLT) 2 Corinthians 12:
14  Behold, I am ready to come to you a third time. And I will not burden you, for I do not seek your things, but you. For the children ought not to lay up treasure for the parents, but the parents for the children.

Parents are the ones who are established, older, experienced, wiser, and much more capable and can help their children find circumstances that will enable them to marrying at a reasonable age, not to be confused with getting a good job first. The world prevents such things. You have to fight the world and enable such things. IN times previous to the Industrial Revolution, particularly from about 1850 on, the first born might live with his wife with one of the couple's parents or on property of the parents, or near the parents, with help provided by the parents and community.

Today, you might have to settle for having the couple live in your house, in a room or 2. Its not what we would like but we have to adjust our expectations as times get more difficult was they do in a depression, which we will certainly enter into soon. Many countries have long been living like this all along. We alone have been very spoiled.

Some teens will want to know why they can't get married. They are certainly willing and eager enough to begin having sex so why are they denied the chance to marry? The parental explanation is that they are too young. But as any teen knows, they do not feel too young. What are the real reasons if there even are any? Mainly, its just finding a reliable job that will pay decently. That is now getting impossible. As well, many jobs are still being lost due to giving away our markets to foreign manufacturers and giving our jobs away as well. so even if you get a job for a while, you are likely to be unemployed many times, making it nearly impossible to keep up a 30 or 40 year mortgage.

Adjust your expectations and accept that in the last days, we will have to be satisfied with very little. It would seem to me that having someone to partner with and enjoy would be one of the few things left to you and the best way to avoid falling prey to temptation.

But I hope it is clear by now that avoiding illicit sexual activity is essential and not easy, either. Having a desire and appetite for sex is as God intended. But being born of an inherited sinful nature, controlling such urges will always be a struggle and challenge. But one we must face and accomplish successfully. This struggle is our most important one to overcome. We must accept the challenge and win so we can be a part of God's Kingdom.

Newspaper: 9 of 10 Have Premarital Sex

This was an article from the Associated Press, which I read in the (Maine) Portland Press Herald, dated Wed. Dec. 20, 2006, page A5.
"Authors say this has been true for decades and raises questions on abstinence-only programs for teens. "
"The high rates extend even to women born in the
1940s, challenging perceptions that people were more chaste in the past."

Actually, this is quite misleading. IN the 40s, during WWII, young women were sort of encouraged, while everyone looked the other way. The girls gave the boys going overseas a going away "present" in case they did not come back or as a reward for going to war. So morals were suspended in favor of the interests of the war. But the 30s were likely more behaved. The 1920s were certainly kind of wild and some periods in the latter 1800s could be questionable, again, especially in times of war such as the Civil War. War always seems to justify poor morals and restraint.

But as Alfred Kinsey showed us, what we thought people were doing was not what they were really doing. It was just not apparent what they were doing or thinking. But the article cited is right when it says, essentially, that everyone is getting laid now, before marriage or at least 90% so. Now since 75% claim to be Christians, that leaves far too many Christians who are fornicating and violating one of God's most important laws.

99% had sex by 44, and 95% had done so before marriage. That is extremely high, given how many are supposed to be God fearing Christians. It seems like something is terribly wrong and Christians should be upset but I am not hearing that. The article mentions that the government funded program for 12 to 29 year olds preaching abstinence only until marriage is not working at all. Actually, that program was pressured by Christians. So it is their failure, too.

So called Christians are great for sticking their heads in the sand and ignoring the obvious problems at hand. If the sexual urges of the young are delayed for very long, they will break down and give in to their God-given urges and have sex without marriage. Abstinence does not work beyond mid teens. The desires must be accommodated by mid teens or failure will be nearly certain. This is why teens always got married in the past, right up till the late 1800s, when a change was made for reasons that are rather suspect.

The purpose of this article is to show how it used to be and why it should be again, and why obeying God's laws is essential and why governments and social engineers changed our former ways of life to begin with.

The World Has Changed
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And has it ever! Our world has changed an awful lot over just the last hundred years or so in the USA. There was a time not so long in the past, just before the Victorian age, when young women used to marry at very early ages by our standards. 13-16 was the norm. In fact, it can be easily demonstrated by anyone significantly informed or alert, if they watch history programs on TV or read much, that most ancient civilizations usually married their daughters off as soon as they reached puberty, 14 being a fairly common year. It was by no means the limit as they sometimes married as young as 12 or waited as long as 16.

Even in primitive (technologically speaking only) 3rd world societies who live in the rainforests and jungles, young ages continue to be the rule. Several tribes such as the Canela tribe of S. America, as seen on the Discovery Channel, Travel Channel, or NatGeo Channel, marry at 11 or 12 typically. Even more shocking is that they used to believe in the newly married girls sharing themselves with 25 to 50 grown men during their festivals. That particular custom is unique but the ages are not.

Even among modern Jews today, 13 is considered the age when a boy becomes a young man and a girl, a young woman. For the boy this is known as a bar-mitzvah. In the Bible, it can be calculated that the age of Dinah was in her teens when Jacob was willing to marry her off. Rebekah is said by the Jewish oral tradition to be 10 when married off to Isaac. The Bible called Rebekah a damsel, maiden, or girl, depending on what translation you use.

Genesis 24:
58 And they [her parents & brother] called Rebekah (Rebecca), and said to her, "Will you go with this man?" She said, "I will go." 
59 So they sent away Rebekah their sister and her nurse, and Abraham's servant and his men.

It is not clear from the Bible how old she is but it must have been on the young side for she had a nurse that they sent along with her, to no doubt to serve as some additional comfort for her at that young tender age.

One has to wonder how old Ruth, the Moabitess was when married, when you consider what the scriptures say. Elimelech, of the tribe of Judah and his wife, Naomi, were Israelites. His two sons were Mahlon and Chilion, Ephrathites from Bethlehem-judah. And they came into the fields of Moab, and remained there, because of a famine in Israel.
Ruth 1:
4 "And they took wives to themselves, women of Moab. The name of the one was Orpah, and the name of the second, Ruth. And they lived there about ten years. 
5 And they also died, both of them, Mahlon and Chilion. And the woman was bereaved of her two children and of her husband."

So they married and lived there 10 years before the sons died and the mother returned with Ruth going with her as Ruth appeared to love her mother in law very much. So Ruth was now 10 years older than when she first married. They returned to Bethlehem and Ruth was eventually married by a much older man than what was apparently typical. His name was Boaz and he was a relative of her father in law, Elimelech. He treated Ruth exceptionally well and she was evidently touched by that.

If you read the account, Boaz was also closely related and so was sort of obligated to perform a brother in law marriage, but there was one other man who was more closely related but did not want the obligation. So Boaz was happy to accept.

Ruth 2:5 And Boaz said to his young man who had been set over the reapers, Whose is this young woman? . . . 
. . .  3:10 And he said, Blessed be you of Jehovah, my daughter. You have dealt more kindly at the latter end than at the beginning, not to go after the young men, either poor or rich.

The point here is that Ruth, still considered quite young I gather, maybe 25 or so perhaps (but possibly less), is eagerly sought after by Boaz, when Ruth sort of offers herself to him. If she was 25, then she must have been only 15 when first marrying. Both ages could be even younger. Had she been much older, she might have been viewed as an older widow, almost past child bearing years. I think the young 20s seems most likely. So she could have been married originally at 12 or 13 easy, making her 22 or 23 upon marrying Boaz.

But regardless of what age Ruth was, history and the Jewish Talmud both indicate that marriages were very typically in the early teen years. There is an interesting account in the Talmud. The shortened version, is known as the "Kitzur Shulchan Aruch". The full book is the "Shulchan Aruch", which means "The Well-Set Table". Anyway, it claims:
"A girl must be 10 years old for marriage, but a 3-year old may be betrothed with the father's approval to any man of any age."
This is the Talumud but I think Jewish understanding and practice had normally been about 13 and up until into the 20th century. Now they are much like the rest, frowning upon anything less than 18. But how old the man was, was not important at one time. Why the change?

Consider also the words of some early 2nd century Christian writers. I first quote Tertullian, because for one, I find him most amusing but hard to take completely serious. By the time he wrote this, he may have joined a sect considered to be apostate in the 2nd century. There were many extremes that developed among Christians at a very early date. But there is still something to be gleaned from Tertullian's words about age and practice among early Christians after the Apostles.

Tertullian's Age Requirements
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Chap. 1
HAVING already undergone the trouble peculiar to my opinion, I will show in Latin also that it behooves our virgins to be veiled from the time that they have passed the turning-point of their age:

[{ The turning point of age? Would he be talking about puberty? I suspect so as we will see. }]

Chap. 7
For if (it is) on account of the angels--those, to wit, whom we read of as having fallen from God and heaven on account of concupiscence after females--who can presume that it was bodies already defiled, and relics of human lust, which such angels yearned after, so as not rather to have been inflamed for virgins, whose bloom pleads an excuse for human lust likewise? For thus does Scripture withal suggest: "And it came to pass," it says, "when men had begun to grow more numerous upon the earth, there were withal daughters born them; but the sons of God, having descried the daughters of men, that they were fair, took to themselves wives of all whom they elected." For here the Greek name of women does seem to have the sense "wives," inasmuch as mention is made of marriage. When, then, it says "the daughters of men," it manifestly purports virgins, who would be still reckoned as belonging to their parents--for wedded women are called their husbands'--whereas it could have said "the wives of men:" in like manner not naming the angels adulterers, but husbands, while they take unwedded " daughters of men," who it has above said were "born," thus also signifying their virginity: first "born;" but here, wedded to angels.

[{ Tertullian here seems to me to be suggesting that this bloom or blossoming of a virgin pleads an excuse for human lust! So I gather he believes that a newly blossoming virgin is considered to be in the most desirable state that would elicit greater lust and desire. Wow! What a change from today where we deny that a newly blossoming virgin could possibly be desirable and that any who might think so are totally past any sense of morality or decency. But that is totally absurd and dishonest. Young women have always been the most desirable ones, until the last few decades when we as a society have appeared to lose our minds and go insane, listening to those above us who say there is a better way now, of seeing it and that we were all wrong for 6000 years and tht god did not know what He was doing, and in fact, they say He does not even exist. Are you going to listen to that crap? }]

Chap. 11
But it is not so; but from the time when she begins to be self-conscious, and to awake to the sense of her own nature, and to emerge from the virgin's (sense), and to experience that novel (sensation) which belongs to the succeeding age.

[{ I detect that he is referring to their first awareness of their sexuality and desire. That is pretty early for many girls and getting ever earlier. Many girls today, due to TV, relaxed attitudes and the influence of their friends at school, are well aware of their "powers" often long before middle school and teenaged years. }]

But even if it is "on account of the angels" that she is to be veiled, doubtless the age from which the law of the veil will come into operation will be that from which "the daughters of men" were able to invite concupiscence of their persons, and to experience marriage. For a virgin ceases to be a virgin from the time that it becomes possible for her not to be one.

[{ I ask, at what age is it possible for a girl not to be a virgin? I assume he might be inferring to being capable of pregnancy as well as a desire to experience sex. He advises a veil as soon as they are able to attract men or angels. From his previous words, this would be as soon as they bloom with their secondary sexual characteristics such as breasts, etc. or even just start to show a serious interest in boys and start flirting and the like. Whether the body is fully developed or not, when they start seeking it out, you had better be ready. Sexual desires will not be put on hold when they take hold. Surely you have seen that before! }]

And accordingly, among Israel, it is unlawful to deliver one to a husband except after the attestation by blood of her maturity; thus, before this indication, the nature is unripe. Therefore if she is a virgin so long as she is unripe, she ceases to be a virgin when she is perceived to be ripe; and, as not-virgin, is now subject to the law, just as she is to marriage. And the betrothed indeed have the example of Rebecca, who, when she was being conducted--herself still unknown--to an unknown betrothed, as soon as she learned that he whom she had sighted from afar was the man, awaited not the grasp of the hand, nor the meeting of the kiss, nor the interchange of salutation; but confessing what she had felt--namely, that she had been (already) wedded in spirit--denied herself to be a virgin by then and there veiling herself.

[{ Tertullian here basically states that as soon as a woman's menstrual cycle begins, she is ready. That can be pretty young or quite well along in a few cases. He states this was the custom in Israel. But if what they say about Rebecca is true, they can be betrothed and leave home even younger. There was no age limit in the Bible. But a woman's cycle can start, long before breasts or other things develop so I don't think that alone can determine anything. Likewise, it is possible for a girl of 16 to still not have begun her cycle. Does she need to wait, even at that point? I don't think precise rules can be made. Each circumstance is unique. But clearly Tertullian argues for a very young age. }]

Another secret mother, Nature, and another hidden father, Time, have wedded their daughter to their own laws. Behold that virgin-daughter of yours already wedded--her soul by expectancy, her flesh by transformation--for whom you are preparing a second husband! Already her voice is changed, her limbs fully formed, her "shame" everywhere clothing itself, the months paying their tributes; and do you deny her to be a woman whom you assert to be undergoing womanly experiences? If the contact of a man makes a woman, let there be no covering except after actual experience of marriage.

[{ Tertullian asks, as if it was absurd to think otherwise, if they really thought a girl was not a woman after having gone through all her "changes." Apparently, he is not expecting many challenges to that. But if there were any, then he says at the very least, she is a woman upon contact or marriage. And less you doubt what ages Tertullian refers to, the next words spell it out for you! }]

Time even the heathens observe, that, in obedience to the law of nature, they may render their own fights to the (different) ages. For their females they dispatch to their businesses from (the age of) twelve years, but the male from two years later; decreeing puberty (to consist) in years, not in espousals or nuptials. "Housewife" one is called, albeit a virgin, and "house-father," albeit a stripling.

[{ Tertullian points out that many "heathens," the nations, do not worry about physical development but only likely psychological development, deeming 12 to be old enough for girls and 14 for boys. Again, I favor each person considered individually. But this is a far cry from how age of maturity or consent is viewed today, where psychological state does not matter, nor sexual developments in the body but only age. Tertullian refers to nature as a big factor. I would agree with that. The next verses follow as much for entertainment as anything else. Tertullian gets kind of graphic. Not that the Bible, too, doesn't do that on an occasion or two, but still, I find it good for a laugh.

Tertullian, alone of all the writers of the 2nd or 3rd century, makes a big deal about little things, indicating his being on the extreme and out of harmony with the mainstream of his time, maybe. Veils were not uncommon in his time but neither were they the standard everywhere. But he is quite concerned about the veil. I will discuss that more on an article about dress and grooming eventually. Anyway, enjoy the next versus of his. }]

Chap. 14
Let her strive as much as you please with an honest mind; she must necessarily be imperiled by the public exhibition of herself, while she is penetrated by the gaze of untrustworthy and multitudinous' eyes, while she is tickled by pointing fingers, while she is too well loved, while she feels a warmth creep over her amid assiduous embraces and kisses. Thus the forehead hardens; thus the sense of shame wears away; thus it relaxes; thus is learned the desire of pleasing in another way!

[{ Unveiled women are seen as nearly fornicating by him, I gather. Maybe he is also talking about kissing and embracing as being improper prior to marriage. I am not sure. But "public exhibition" is seen by him as wrong. But knowing what ages he refers to in this, we are talking some serious stuff here. Odd that though Tertullian appear to be a prude, his suggestive language indicates that he is not afraid to tackle serious issues. He is at least good for a laugh.

But he also refers to women showing off excessively, enjoying the looks and stares of men, and likes getting the attention of men and knowing that they turn men on. And he feels this is not good and that the women somehow lose the sense of shame in displaying so much of themselves. They get deadened to the flirting with disaster. Maybe. It deserves consideration. But I also warn that if you get too righteous and too extreme with behavior requirements, you will not do well. While showing off is not the best of things, it is also far from the worst as well. In the out of control loose climate of today, showing off a little is pretty mild and for youth, not really unexpected.

The next account of Tertullian comes from his Treatise on the Soul. And part of that subject is the joint growth of our psychological maturity and makeup with our physical/sexual maturity and makeup, which Tertullian suggest that both go together and develop at the same pace. I say that they are near each other, but one sometimes getting slightly ahead of or behind the other. They won't be far off from each other in most cases.}]



Now we have already laid down the principle, that all the natural properties of the soul which relate to sense and intelligence are inherent in its very substance, and spring from its native constitution, but that they advance by a gradual growth through the stages of life and develop themselves in different ways by accidental circumstances, according to men's means and arts, their manners and customs their local situations, and the influences of the Supreme Powers; but in pursuance of that aspect of the association of body and soul which We have now to consider, we maintain that the puberty of the soul coincides with that of the body, and that they attain both together to this full growth at about the fourteenth year of life, speaking generally,--the former by the suggestion of the senses, and the latter by the growth of the bodily members; and (we fix on this age) not because, as Asclepiades supposes, reflection then begins, nor because the civil laws date the commencement of the real business of life from this period, but because this was the appointed order from the very first.


[{ What Tertullian says is that they are ready for sex and marriage in mind as well as in body before they are "ready." They are not little girls or boys when they have all the physical signs of sexual maturity. Most today do not want to admit that for too many reasons to address here. We will get to it later in this article. He spells it out by saying 14, although we note in His "Veiling of Virgins" that 12 is suggested. Here he says 14th year, which is only 13 full years old. 13 and a half is still 13 under our law but is the 14th uncompleted year.


Also note that Tertullian does not justify 13 because some philosopher says so or reasons so, nor because it is the law, which it was, but because it has always been that way according to Tertullian and he is absolutely correct. If it was good for Israel and good for early Christianity and even good for Islam, then why did it change in the late 19th century? How come not one prophet of God ever complained about men robbing the cradle? It must be that God does not see it as robbing the cradle at 13 or 14, necessarily or He certainly would have spoken. We can only wonder at why something existed for 5,860 years and then suddenly change, at the very same time as the world we were living in was also undergoing massive radical changes in every aspect of our society. Was it really for our good? }]

For as Adam and Eve felt that they must cover their nakedness after their knowledge of good and evil so we profess to have the same discernment of good and evil from the time that we experience the same sensation of shame. Now from the before-mentioned age (of fourteen years), sex is suffused and clothed with an especial sensibility, and concupiscence employs the ministry of the eye, and communicates its pleasure to another, and understands the natural relations between male and female, and wears the fig-tree apron to cover the shame which it still excites, and drives man out of the paradise of innocence and chastity, and in its wild pruriency falls upon sins and unnatural incentives to delinquency; for its impulse has by this time surpassed the appointment of nature, and springs from its vicious abuse.


[{ Tertullian basically suggests that when puberty arrives and is complete, it will be difficult to control or hold back.  The impulse surpasses the appointed time for fulfillment given by nature and must be yielded to. But we in our stupidity, arrogance, and foolishness, wishing to ignore or even rebel against nature and God who made the laws of that nature, preferring to ignore the time of calling and ask the young to delay their overwhelming desire from 14 to maybe graduation from college (22 or 26 or more) with time also allowed for gaining financial independence, if such is even possible by 40.This is absolutely absurd and impossible to ask of nearly anyone of a young age. The result is massive wide-spread pervasive fornication among Christian youth (from teen years onward).


I surely hope I do not need to point out that fornication is one of the worst sins to commit and one that is upheld in Acts 15 as one of the 4 worst sins to avoid. Yet we prefer one of the 4 worst to having our offspring get married at a decent reasonable age, as if that was so much more important. How insane is that???  I let Tertullian finish his discourse for the curious. }]

But the strictly natural concupiscence is simply confined to the desire of those aliments which God at the beginning conferred upon than. "Of every tree of the garden" He says, "you shall freely eat;" and then again to the generation which followed next after the flood He enlarged the grant: "Every moving thing that lives shall be meat for you; behold, as the green herb have I given you all these things,"--where He has regard rather to the body than to the soul, although it be in the interest of the soul also. For we must remove all occasion from the caviller, who, because the soul apparently wants ailments, would insist on the soul's being from this circumstance deemed mortal, since it is sustained by meat and drink and after a time loses its rigor when they are withheld, and on their complete removal ultimately droops and dies.

Now the point we must keep in view is not merely which particular faculty it is which desires these (aliments), but also for what end; and even if it be for its own sake, still the question remains, Why this desire, and when felt, and how long? Then again there is the consideration, that it is one thing to desire by natural instinct, and another thing to desire through necessity; one thing to desire as a property of being, another thing to desire for a special object.


The soul, therefore, will desire meat and drink--for itself indeed, because of a special necessity; for the flesh, however, from the nature of its properties.

For the flesh is no doubt the house of the soul, and the soul is the temporary inhabitant of the flesh. The desire, then, of the lodger will arise from the temporary cause and the special necessity which his very designation suggests,--with a view to benefit and improve the place of his temporary abode, while sojourning in it; not with the view, certainly, of being himself the foundation of the house, or himself its walls, or himself its support and roof, but simply and solely with the view of being accommodated and housed, since he could not receive such accommodation except in a sound and well-built house. (Now, applying this imagery to the soul,) if it be not provided with this accommodation, it will not be in its power to quit its dwelling-place, and for want of fit and proper resources, to depart safe and sound, in possession, too, of its own supports, and the aliments which belong to its own proper condition,--namely immortality, rationality, sensibility, intelligence, and freedom of the will.

[{ In a long sort of beating around the bush way, Tertullian suggests that the flesh, the body, caused the soul to desire sex. He, like a number of those near to his time, as opposed to earlier in the 2nd century, sees the soul as being separate from the flesh. I strongly say it is not. The 2 are one and desiring sex and having a sexual appetite is not of itself wrong. But when the appetite becomes manifest, we need to accommodate it at the earliest possible convenience or we will risk having our kids fall prey to fornication and kids out of wedlock and possibly without a father, one of the 4 worst sins in God 's book of laws! Are you a Christian or not? By your fruits I will know you and so will God. }]

End of Tertullian's Accounts

Clement of Alexandria's Age Requirements
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But they who approve of marriage say, Nature has adapted us for marriage, as is evident from the structure of our bodies, which are male and female. And they constantly proclaim that command, "Increase and replenish."

Legislators, moreover, do not allow those who are unmarried to discharge the highest magisterial offices. For instance, the legislator of the Spartans imposed a fine not on bachelorhood only, but on monogamy, and late marriage, and single life. And the renowned Plato orders the man who has not married to pay a wife's maintenance into the public treasury, and to give to the magistrates a suitable sum of money as expenses. For if they shall not beget children, not having married, they produce, as far as in them lies, a scarcity of men, and dissolve states and the world that is composed of them, impiously doing away with divine generation. It is also unmanly and weak to shun living with a wife and children. For of that of which the loss is an evil, the possession is by all means a good; and this is the case with the rest of things. But the loss of children is, they say, among the chiefest evils: the possession of children is consequently a good thing; and if it be so, so also is marriage.

[{ Well, well, well! It seems that some thought marriage to be a good thing and the sooner the better! Imagine that! And having children a good thing and some punish those who did not marry and have children. Who would have believed it! Boy, have we ever changed, huh? What a reversal! I must point out that in a world where nations were races and each struggled with the others, staying more numerous and replenishing the war machine with more soldiers was a means of survival. He who did not contribute to the cause of survival was not liked and seen as letting the rest down. Birth control and abortion were unimaginable in such circumstances and one can see why.

But God has other plans. Godly men often married late, and sometimes not at all. In God's mind, pursuing Godly things is preferable to having children. In fact, there are far fewer men who would even want to pursue wisdom over the pleasures that bring children to birth. So one does not need to encourage breeding. It does well on its own. If anything, one needs to be careful to avoid discouraging those who elect to pursue God rather than the responsibilities of marriage. Jesus encouraged singleness if it was not a bother and Paul did so, too. Early Christian women sometimes chose to remain virgins and served as prophetesses in the early days when the Spirit was active.

But neither let it be said that there is anything wrong with marriage for really, if a religion is to grow and prosper, indeed, if any cause or whatever is to remain among the living and prosper, it will need to breed and pass the torch on to the next generation. Let each do as they see right. I have read of some who think that birth control and abortion are outright wrong. I disagree. God gave us options and pursuing Godly things is not wrong, not sinful, and is a legitimate direction to choose.

And indeed, most industrial nations today, particularly the USA, have made it nearly impossible for for righteous responsible people to consider having kids due to the unstable and uncertain economic climate and future. Wages being low and labor being subverted by flooding the nation with new desperate laborers from other nations, which the USA has always done, way before it even became an independent nation, has made supporting a family in a proper way to be nearly impossible. So many, not out of will, but more out of force of circumstances beyond their control, avoid having children for fear they may later become unemployed or not be able to earn enough without both parents working, thereby neglecting their kids and having to leave them to be trained by others when they know it is their responsibility to teach and train their own kids. They reason that if they can not do it right, as it should be done, then they decide not to do it at all. I see this as right. Jesus said woe to those with young kids in the last days for it will be most difficult at that time - Matt. 24:19.

But I also point out that some people in the highest levels of society and government do not desire those of good moral and intellectual character to breed and populate in the modern age. They want our numbers to die out and let others of a lower moral and intellectual level to breed and outnumber the intelligent ones, so that there will be less resistance and the dumb will be easier to manipulate and deceive. So there is a madness to their purpose among the social engineers and progressives who control and influence who breeds and who does not. Let that be as it may. We can become spiritual fathers and mothers rather than literal parents of real children. }]

Matt. 24:

19 But woe to the woman having a child in womb, and to those suckling in those days!

20 And pray that your flight will not be in winter nor on a Sabbath.

21 For there will be great affliction, such as has not happened from the beginning of the world until now, no, nor ever will be.
22 And except those days were shortened, not any flesh would be saved. But on account of the elect, those days will be shortened.

So, in view of such circumstances, let each person do what seems right to them and not judge either way. What we want to understand is how when discussing marriage, we should know that marrying young was always the way it was done for a variety of reasons which I am amply demonstrating to you from writings of respected Christian writers and other philosopher and historian types. It is not new. Only what we do now is new, considerably less then 200 years.

Justinian's Age Requirements
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A rather famous well known law code was that issued by Eastern Roman Emperor Justinian in 535 AD. What is relevant to this discussion are the minimum ages for marriage.

Book 1    X. Marriage.

Roman citizens are bound together in lawful matrimony when they are united according to law, the males having attained the age of puberty, and the females a marriageable age, whether they are fathers or sons of a family; but, of the latter, they must first obtain the consent of their parents, in whose power they are. For both natural reason and the law require this consent; so much so, indeed, that it ought to precede the marriage. Hence the question has arisen, whether the daughter of a madman could be married, or his son marry? And as opinions were divided as to the son, we decided that as the daughter of a madman might, so may the son of a madman marry without the intervention of the father, according to the mode established by our constitutio.

XXII. Freedom from Guardianship.

Pupils, both male and female, are freed from tutelage when they attain the age of puberty. The ancients judged of puberty in males, not only by their years, but also by the development of their bodies. But we, from a wish to conform to the purity of the present times, have thought it proper, that what seemed even to the ancients to be indecent towards females, namely, the inspection of the body, should be thought no less so towards males; and, therefore, by our sacred constitutio, we have enacted that puberty in males should be considered to commence immediately on the completion of their fourteenth year; while, as to females, we have preserved the wise rule adopted by the ancients, by which they are esteemed fit for marriage on the completion of their twelfth year.

[{ Did you see that? Males and females could be free of guardianship at 14 and 12 respectively. They were of legal age, so to speak. What a difference from today, huh? Like day and night! I also note that In Justinian's day and long before him, it was universally thought indecent and wrong to "inspect" the body of a female, particularly at the age of 12. Look how far we have sunken and degenerated in that our laws think nothing of forcing women and girls to be strip searched, including body cavities. Such indignities seeming outrageous, perhaps even seen as practically rape, which indeed, is the case. In fact, as regards girls under 16, they can be forced to be striped and have their vaginas examined to see if they have had sex or not. What would those of 200 years or more have thought of that?! The ancients would be in shock. They would think us the ultimate ruthless barbarians. And they would be right! Nothing is sacred today.

And keep in mind that Justinian was considered quite the corrupt Emperor who had no shame when it came to stealing and extortion. He was poorly thought of by many, yet even he would not stoop to the all time low that we have today. Those of the Roman empire were content to allow a young woman or even child to declare for herself whether she has been harmed or not. If she says nothing, that is her business. Today we think it much better that she should have no say at all in what happens to her. And of course, it is always to "protect" her and look out for "her own interests." And who should know that better than anyone else but her. We say that is the right way but it clearly is not how God saw it or prescribed it.

As Jesus might say, it will be more endurable in Rome than for this generation, and Rome will rise in condemnation of this generation. Pretty sad, really!

Instead, we see a young female as having no brains, no feelings, no rights. I am surprised she is even deemed as alive. We who are assigned oversight can do as we please with her. Interesting! I wonder if anyone has ever asked them how they feel about all that! I don't think we would care what they answered, anyway. By our fruits we should be judged. I think God shall do so shortly. You better hope you are on the right side! }]

XXIII. Curatorship.

Males arrived at the age of puberty, and females of a marriageable age, receive curators, until they have completed their twenty-fifth year; for, although they have attained the age of puberty, they are still of an age which makes them unfit to protect their own interests.

2. No adolescent is obliged to receive a curator against his will, unless in case of a lawsuit, for a curator may be appointed for a particular special purpose.

4. Persons who are of unsound mind, or who are deaf, mute, or subject to any perpetual malady, since they are unable to manage their own affairs, must be placed under curators.

Note that the age of females considered acceptable was only 12 full years old. That is pretty standard among ancient nations and 3rd world nations of today. Consider too, that females develop earlier today. Girls were considered psychologically capable even if not quite developed enough physically. My, how the 20th century has changed.

In all these opinions and law codes, we see the age was actually very young. These are commonly accepted ages, except in industrial countries since 1860 onward. But another interesting point is that the law of Rome recognized that though they may be fit for marriage at 14 or 12, there were many other things that they were likely not yet fully informed in. So help was required for those, I assume, without parents, though they could refuse a curator. But we are all always learning and when we come upon something difficult, such as knowledge of law, or health, or income taxes, we seek out experts for advice or help.

Parents should always be on hand to be able to offer guidance and advice, having far more experience than the young couple. Being young when starting out, they will need such help. They should not have to go it alone. And for us to expect that they will be prepared for anything, why that is absurd and unreasonable. Kids will need parents throughout their lives. And were it not for grandparents often dying near the time many young couples start our or a little ways after, it would be great to be able to draw on the knowledge and experience of the grandparents and many generations before them.

It would be absurd to try to navigate life without the experience of those who came before us. That is no reason to deny a young couple the right to marry.

Notable Young Marriages
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Rodrigo Borgia became Pope Alexander VI (1431 – 1503 AD) and was Pope from 1492 to 1503. He is the most controversial of the secular popes of the Renaissance, and his surname became a byword for the debased standards of the papacy of that era.

He had a daughter, Lucrezia Borgia (1480 - 1519 AD) (pronounced basically, Loo-cray-chia). By the time she was thirteen, she had been betrothed twice, but both times her father had called off the engagements. After Rodrigo became Pope Alexander VI, he finally had Lucrezia, still at 13, marry Giovanni Sforza to establish an alliance with that powerful Milanese family. I would say Lucrezia was probably 12 when first offered in marriage, even though the deal eventually fell through.

Another example

Emperor Charles Charlemagne of the Holy Roman Empire - also known as Charlemagne the Great - was born in 747 AD in Aix La Chapelle, Austrasia and died 813/814 AD in Aix la Chapelle, France . He is a well known figure during the dark ages of Europe . Came along a little more than 200 years after Justinian reigned.

Hildegard 758 – 783 AD  was the daughter of Austrian nobility. Charlemagne married Hildegard in 771 after divorcing Desideria. With her, he had most of his children and all of his heirs. She married Charlemagne in 771. It is said she married at 12 years of age. The years given could amount to 12 or 13. Romans thought 12 was fine. According to Justinian just above, this has been the custom since the days of the ancients.

These were both very visible prominent marriages, yet no mention of scandal due to age. Truth be told, this was a common age to marry and commonly done. And it was not new or recent. It had been the way it had always been and continued to be. Well, that is till about 1860 or a little later when it was decided that kids needed far more education than they had gotten till that point. So rather than enter the adult world and get married and start a family, they were kept in school far beyond what was good for people and society, so that they could be "better prepared" for jobs and life. In reality, it was done so that youth could be programmed the way that government, controlled by big business, wanted.

The odd thing is, after this forced "schooling" began, literacy rates went down along with maturity. Age at entry to college got older, from 14 to 18. Children seemed to become much less capable at ever older ages. And immoral sexual conduct became far more common. I recall something said by Jesus about "by their fruits you will know them!" By the fruits of this movement, I would say we lost a lot and gained nothing. Education was used as an excuse for better jobs and pay but education apart from a job and/or an apprenticeship on the job have never been necessary before. But if we are to justify more education, more "programming" and regimentation, far into pubescence and even adulthood, so as to shape kids into some other image than that of the family or God, then one needed a good excuse or perhaps leverage such as not allowing them good jobs or pay unless they submit to government "programming." Some even call it brain washing.

To further enable "education" into adulthood, they made all child labor illegal and said it was bad for kids, even though it was fine for nearly 6000 years previous. My, what a difference 6000 years makes, huh? And since a good paying job required more "indoctrination," many eventually accepted the lengthened extended burden of time and sought out immoral sex to quench their hunger for such urges installed by God.

But the fruits, the results, of this change, after nearly 6,000 years (at the very least from those subscribing to evolution), was a disaster all around. That is what happens when you delay adulthood, maturity, responsibility, and training that involved lots of God's teachings in it. What we sow we then reap, do we not? 12 or 13 was not unusual before the 19th century. To the contrary, it was the rule and always had been. Something was going on!

Why the Change?
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That now brings us to the question. If they typically married at such young ages for most of mankind's history, why did we change rather recently? In fact, when you consider it, it is we in the modern world, who are odd and the anomaly in the progression of history. Further, we never used to mass school our young. Why was it thought necessary now? And how is it that schooling made kids dumber rather than smarter. So if kids do worse in school, why do we bother with school at all? Well, most of it has to do with making a living and being able to support a young wife on 1 income. In addition, the role of women, another exception and anomaly in our time, has changed radically in the USA, especially. There are some other reasons, too.

Some of that is due to the difficulty that industry has made in people obtaining a living. When we were farm based, we may not have had much but we had enough to begin marriage and families. That was not a bad thing, that was a good thing. Now that we depend on employers for a living, we can not even obtain a meager living that enables a family. Having a family is more of a privilege than a right. That is what is wrong with our country and an evidence of neglect and failure in our law codes and constitution in not addressing those issues. So now we delay marriage, almost out of necessity, but not so much because of age as of circumstance. An artificial circumstance created deliberately to delay adulthood, while we get programmed and indoctrinated by the "state."

I am going to suggest that it was also the desire of industrial nations to get parents to turn over training and influence of children to the government, always at the beckon and call of big business. But when this was done, people of the USA loudly protested. So they had to ban child labor, which was a good source of income for parents and a family. In this way, the kids would just be sitting around anyway so why not send them to a brainwashing school, I mean school of education. Further, in order to encourage brainwashing, (damn, these computer keyboard typos) I mean encourage education and indoctrination ( I just guts to gets me a new fangled computer, huh?) well into adult years by mean of college, which ordinarily would be quite silly, they needed to have a reason for going to college, so they said that you needed college to get an education to prepare you for the work force, though we had not needed it prior to this time in order to have a good work force with on the job training.

So now we get trained and indoctrinated for 12, 16, 20 years before we are turned out into the work force. And of course, no one is going to wait that long for marriage and sex. And while we are at it, why bother with marriage at all. Just have the sex, right. We are so desperate at the commencing of puberty that waiting will not be likely for very long. And by prohibiting adults from being attracted to anyone particularly young, when they are often more influenced and vulnerable to influence; our government, not wanting competition when the young are more easily capable of being influenced, pass all manner of outrageous law so that anyone even thinking about having anything at all to do with anyone under 18, will be brutally and unreasonably and severely punished by the judicial system. This keeps the young completely isolated from any contact or little contact with anyone over 17, including the parents who are too busy working and leaving most things to do with kids to the government schools, TV, peers, and organized activities which keep God out of the picture, and parents, too, for the most part.

In many respects, this is a subtle invisible kidnapping of our children. We pay for their expenses but the government gets to teach the kids their way, though they are not paying for that. We are! Brilliant and we go right along with it. Are we stupid or what?

Of course, non-profit agencies poured out propaganda that it was horrible that kids were getting married before getting a good "education" and women had no chance for advancement and ought not to have to be a child bearer in order to live a good meaningful life. Eventually, it even became abuse to marry. And of course, kids working horrible unsafe jobs was outrageous. Agreed! Why not just make sure they only had to work in safe conditions. If they are so bad for kids, why are they OK for adults? No one should have to work in an unsafe job, period! But eventually, we fell for it or more accurately, it was forced upon us anyway and we came to reluctantly accept it like a woman overpowered by a big mean nasty rapist.

Of course, we are given other better reasons why these laws and policies are in place but if you believe those, I'd like to offer some of this genuine miracle snake oil I have brewed up that will cure absolutely anything you want it to. All you have to supply is credulity. Deal? What? Me sarcastic? Oh, alright, ya guts me!

Our way of life changed radically in the 19th & 20th centuries. Many people used to live an agricultural lifestyle prior to the industrial revolution. With factories and city life becoming much more common, especially after the assembly line was invented at the turn to the 20th century, life styles changed with it and more options became available to many, whereas farming was the only option for many at one time and people started families as much out of necessity as out of desire. But due to our reverence for Queen Victoria instead of God, and with the ever watchful eye of the FBI and Comstock laws, we also do it out of concern for age, which is not right and nor Biblical. Things were complicated by the ridiculous Victorian values that somehow seemed to be the unpopular rage and scarred people's normal healthy sense of sexual identity, already traumatized by the Catholic church and dualists from the 5th century onward. And big business wanted to mold our kids to their way of thinking. If they could educate us throughout childhood, maybe they could convince us that good was bad and bad was good and then we would come to accept anything, regardless of how much we suffered by it. It certainly seems to have worked or . . . maybe zombies are real! We are the living dead, are we not? Brain dead, anyway!

And lest you think I am silly in this suggestion, you might want to consider a book written by John Taylor Gatto, entitled, "The Underground History of American Education," where he shows what I suggest was nearly exactly what the government was trying to do and did. It is not just far fling speculation. They want your kids and they want no one else to get near them, including you, the parents. And get this! You pay for this with your taxes for education. You pay to have your influence and that of God eliminated. I wonder what God will say about that?

Gatto shows us the many places these diabolical plans were dreamed up and actually published in print in the publications of these do-gooder non-profit groups and societies. Gatto's book is, by my estimation, the most important book written in the Industrial Age. You can read it for free in the link in his name above, but being big, you might find it more convenient to buy a printed copy to read at leisure without sitting at a computer screen and straining your eyes. I got the book myself.

But dare I ask, were these changes really good? Is it for the better? Have things improved because of it? Or is it because things have degraded so bad that we do it out of necessity and not willfully? These are what we will explore. There are some interesting reasons why we have a different set of beliefs now in the USA and most other industrial countries all around the world. It has a lot to do with politics of the turn of the 19th to 20th centuries. I have a study done by the University of Maryland's Kriste Lindenmeyer that should prove very enlightening. I urge you to read what it has to say if you wonder how and why things got changed. Very enlightening and what I would call essential knowledge for Christians. I will also supply the link at the end under related articles if you would prefer to wait till then to read it.

The Lindmeyer Study - Adolescence, Marriage, and Parenthood in the Twentieth Century U.S.

What is Adulthood and Maturity?
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Though not readily recognized in our often loose usage of terms, there are different types of adulthood or maturity. First, there is physical maturity and then there is intellectual maturity, emotional or psychological maturity, sexual maturity and maybe others, too. Same with adulthood. There is the legal age of adulthood which can very according to state or country. There are various ages, even within the same state, for individual issues such as the legal age to drink, consent to sex, to have an abortion, to get a drivers license, to vote, or to go to war and die. We are an inconsistent nation, for sure.

So first we have complete finished physical maturity. That is where long bone growth is completed and we grow no more. For women this is about 19 and for men, about 21, I believe. But as we all know, physical maturity does not always correspond with mental or emotional maturity.

Then we have sexual maturity whereby the secondary sexual characteristics of males and females are formed so that they then become capable of reproduction. Assuming that most readers here are believers of God, we must wonder why God or evolution, if you are not a believer, would adapt us for sex and reproduction, even before we are fully grown, otherwise. But the fact remains that we reach sexual maturity, at least in the physical sense, sometimes long before we finish our long bone growth. I will explore the possibilities of why shortly.

Then we have other types of maturity such as mental, emotional, and psychological maturity. These can vary considerably. There do seem to be some fairly common stages in those types of maturity, but as any of us know, some reach much greater levels of maturity in some areas than others. Some are very responsible and others not much at all. Some are very stable and others are not. There is a large variance and this can play a big factor in that loosely used word, maturity. But for sure, many types of maturity do not correspond to age at all. Some adults act like complete babies while some kids can display incredible maturity for their age, often outdoing many so called adults. This factor will come into play in this article.

Inconsistent Legal Definitions
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Over the years, as cars have become a major part of our lives since WWII, as more commonly owned in greater numbers, and as teens seek licenses at ever earlier ages, a trend has developed. Speaking only with what I am familiar with, the laws in the state of Maine, that to some degree, reflect trends all over the USA, the age for obtaining a permit used to be 15. One could theoretically obtain a license at that age in 1977 at least. But times have changed and that age has been raised as to being able to obtain a license to drive without an adult.

This age limit was raised because kids were more numerous on the road and driving more recklessly and foolishly. So it was imagined that if the age was raised, it would give more time for the boys to develop some more maturity. But that has not worked. To raise it high enough to accomplish that, you might have to extend it to 30, rather than 16, 17, or whatever it is in your state. Insurance is much higher for young drivers than for older ones, partly because of more skill developed but more primarily because youth tend to be more immature and irresponsible.

In Maine, particularly in the greater Portland area from 1999 onward, teens have been getting killed in alarming numbers and almost exclusively through carelessness, stupidity, and recklessness. Alcohol only occasionally plays a part in these deaths or is blamed when it is not the real problem. Now our answer to that is raise the age ever higher along with insurance rates. In addition in Maine, they have now forbid that teens an have more than one passenger in their car under the legal age of 18 or 21 or somewhere in that range. Teens love to gather 4 to 6 in a car. No doubt, as I see it all the time. And when they get together, their brains go out the widow and sometimes, their lives, too, or the lives of their passengers.

But I think a much better solution is to try these brain dead kids as murderers and send them up river for a number of years where they can learn the hard way and sober up. Not that it will help them so much, but it might wake up other teens and make them think twice about being stupid and reckless with an automobile and friends.

This is not the only trend like this. The legal age to drink in Maine once used to be 18 as was the legal age for many things at that time. By 1977, it was raised to 19, like that was going to change a lot. Sort of like the coyote holding up his little umbrella as a huge rock from above fell towards him on the Roadrunner cartoon. It is now up to 21. That does not stop college drinking as there are plenty of 22 to 24 year olds on campus who can obtain plenty of alcohol, although it is now a felony to supply alcohol to a minor, which in this case is now 21.

Even more perplexing is that a minor, a teen, can, in some states, get an abortion, without parental consent or knowledge. They are old enough to get an abortion but not to consent to sex with someone 18 or older or someone more than 5 years older. How is that for a contradiction and paradox?

But for business contracts or sex, it is 18. You are also legally able to fight and die at 18 but not legal enough to drink. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. Voting, too, has been allowed to 18 year olds. The contradiction and inconsistency exists, in that, to me, dying is a much more serious decision than is drinking or having sex, but die you can, at 18, but don't think about a drink till 21. Some have suggested letting high school kids vote or even retarded people. Why not! We already let dead people, dogs, and cats vote, so I hear. But I guess you don't have to be intelligent or discerning to vote, and given the election results, it shows!

Is alcohol drinking among the young a problem? Absolutely! I don't deny that at all. But is raising the age the best way to cope with it? Is it an effective and successful way to cope?

And what about the various ages for getting a license or drinking? It varies from state to state. So it can only be a matter of preference or convenience and not something more psychological that prevents any person under that age from being responsible. Same with licenses, too. Business contracts have consistently seemed to have remained at 18, without parental consent and co-signing. War and being a soldier has always stayed as young as possible as 18. No breaks there, if a draft should come back. Teens, in many countries, will be forced into military service as well.

It is the same with consensual sex. One can elect to have sex with someone 18 or older, but they can not engage a 17 year old or younger as this would be considered statutory rape, because a 17 year old is not considered mature, wise, or developed enough psychologically to engage in such behavior or in fact, to engage in anything. They are practically vegetables, it would seem. Maybe that is why they need 20 years of ed-ya-ma-cation. I only guts me 12 as you'z can see. Well, we make no exceptions for any other legal activity so we can't fault the law there, but there is still reason for concern about sex and the other things as well. It has to do with responsibility in our society as well as the nature of sexual attraction.

Accountability Vital to a Healthy Society
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Alcohol, sex, and drivers licenses are not the only chronic problems that society has had to deal with. More and more, teens and even pre-teens are becoming murderers and committing other such violent or destructive crimes. So bad and out of hand has it gotten, that some states have begun to realize that it has become necessary to try these kids as adults for these very serious crimes. But why?

Because the kids, being very smart, have come to realize that the law was not making them accountable for crimes that would make adults accountable. The kids found they could do whatever they wanted with little punishment. Should they end up in reform school, they would be released by 18 and be free again. What a deal! So in these extreme situations, we were able to understand and accept that kids had to be fully accountable and responsible for their actions or they would only get worse. So now in many places, people under 18 are now being tried as adults for many serious crimes. About time, I say. The Bible has always held kids fully accountable. Lets look at that.

Biblical Accountability Among Children
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(GLT) Deuteronomy 21:
18 If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not listen to his father's voice, or his mother's voice; 
even though they discipline him, he will not listen to them; 
19 then his father and his mother shall lay hold on him and bring him out to the elders of his city, and to the gate of his place; 
20 and they shall say to the elders of his city, This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious; 
he will not listen to our voice; he is a glutton, and a drunkard. 
21 And all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, and he shall die. So you shall put away the evil from among you,
that all Israel shall hear, and fear.

I use to wonder about this scripture back in the 1980's. It seems to refer to a son of significant age since he drinks and is a glutton. I wondered if it did or should apply to kids under 12 or more. Then I considered the next account and decided they were accountable under 12 as well.

2 Kings 2:
23 And he [Elijah] went up from there to Bethel. And he was going up in the highway. And little boys came out from the city 
and mocked him, and said to him, Go up, bald head! Go up, bald head! 
24 And he turned behind him and saw them, and declared them vile in the name of Jehovah. 
And two bears came out of the forest and tore forty two boys of them.

Evidently God did not take too kindly to small boys disrespecting older men, especially when they are prophets. The boys and their parents learned the hard way why discipline and respect are important. But even without the punishment and vengeance of God, respect is vitally important to a society and it will not profit when disrespect of others becomes rampant and without justifiable cause as was the case with Elijah who had done nothing to these little brats.

Why Minors Need to be Accountable
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Well, at that time in the 1980's, many things had yet to develop that have now become common place so that I wonder no longer wonder about the law of God. If you have ever watched any of the talk shows, a quite common and evidently popular subject now seems to be either disturbed kids of 10 or more years of age, or outright rebellious kids of that age. These kids, too, realized that the law gave them total power over their parents. The law had tied the parents hands, which in itself has to make you wonder about the law and its real intentions. But anyway, the kids would drink, do drugs, stay out all night, have sex with all sorts of people, even adults. Just wild out of control behavior.

What these talk shows would do is sponsor the parents and help enroll these kids in modern day boot camps for teens and kids. There was severe discipline, though no violence of any kind, and when they were done, most of these kids did a 180 degree turn-around in behavior. They saw the light. Suddenly they had lost control, had their lives taken over by others, and there was no escape and the law had abandoned them.

Now you can call them boot camps since they resemble that. But they are in many ways another name for a detention center or concentration camp or a penal institution that is sanctioned by law. The whole thing is sort of hypocritical. If parents did what these camps did, they would be in jail and lose custody of their kids. But if they spend thousands of dollars or find someone else to spend that for them such as a talk show, then they can send the kids to a camp that the government and law does allow to discipline these kids.

What the parents did not know how to do and would not be allowed to do if they did know, is otherwise allowed within a special arrangement with these "psychological" facilities. The end result is good, but the parents should have been allowed this disciplinary option without the camps. The bottom line is that the extreme control of behavior and discipline changes the attitudes of these kids fast. They thought they were beyond all reach of the law and found out the hard way that they are not. They got a little surprise, you might say.

Well, this is the problem in all aspects of our culture and society today. We do not discipline our kids and make them accountable as the Bible did. In the Bible, if a kid would not listen, they could end up being stoned and killed. Yes, the death penalty. It has the effect of making kids behave reasonably. It does much the same today with these camps which are nothing more than a disciplined and regulated sort of punishment facility where they are put in, not by conviction of the law but by parental consent. It works! It just costs a lot of money but you don't end up in jail for child abuse for these institutions can legally practice what you would be thrown in jail for. Ain't it grand? What a bunch of B#!!$%!*. By the way, if you like my snake oil, you'll really like my magic beans. Call me today for a limited time offer.

Kids need to be fully responsible for their behavior and accountable to the law. We have learned this in extreme cases. We should be applying it in other places that we don't yet apply it in. But we are kind of dull in the senses.

Children Used to Do and Be a Lot More
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While touring the Longfellow house in the summer of 2001 in Portland, Maine, the boyhood home of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, the late 19th century's most famous poet, a superstar of his day, I was told by the guide from the Maine Historical Society that Henry, like most boys his age, attended college at 14. This was sort of a shock to me. 14? Gatto confirms this as well in his book on Education that I mentioned earlier. Yes, that was the standard age of the time. Longfellow was an eloquent writer. But for that matter, so were a number of soldiers in the Civil War if you saw the Ken Burns PBS series in the late 1980's on the Civil War. It was a great series.

Of course, kids used to work as laborers before child labor laws were put into effect. Within reason, that was a good thing. But kids were and are hunters by 11 or 12 in tribal situations. In many respects, kids in the past have been expected to perform as adults and have done so quite well. So we know they can if they want to. Whether they should is another matter and at what specific age.

Knowing that kids were very literate and ready for college and life at so young an age, why are our kids today now taking till 18 to graduate? And why have their SAT scores dropped into oblivion? Why can't they write as beautifully with such command of the language as ordinary soldiers did, even without college, in 1860? Where did we go wrong? We are turning out a bunch of literary flops and ever poorer test scores and more illiteracy.

Well, from being a student of the school system myself, I know that grades 1-3 were primarily spent on learning addition and subtraction in math class with a limited brief intro to multiplication in 3rd grade. For 3 years, we learned maybe 2 or 3 small mathematical principles. In fact, when in 5th grade, my teacher told me that you can't take a larger number from a smaller one. I spoke up and said you could indeed take a larger number from a smaller one and then owe the rest. I was already comprehending integer math and was shot down for it. He could have at least said yes, but that is a more advanced math and you will need to wait to learn more about it. But he just said no. That's OK, I didn't listen to him, anyway.

Unfortunately, my parents could not even teach me multiplication when I asked how, after 1st grade got out for the summer. I did poorly in school up to 4th grade, not for lack of ability, but out of shear boredom. The schools are horribly slow and deficient in teaching kids progressively higher concepts and ideas. Gatto says it is a deliberate attempt to prevent us from learning as much. You have to read the book. We have gotten the idea that kids are stupid and slow. Much the opposite, their minds are smarter and faster at younger ages than at old ages and are eager to learn if they are not neglected or unloved. So we delay significant learning and drag out and prolong the learning process. This technique is known as dumbing down and I am not of the belief that it is by accident, either. But that would be another story.

So while kids were ready for college at 14, now they are barely ready at 18, intellectually, in regards to literary skills at least, and maybe not quite ready enough for emotional maturity and taking their education seriously and responsibly. I believe we are all partially responsible for this failure as parents and as a society. We expect so little from our kids and get so little as a result. You get what you ask for, it is said. Ask for nothing and that is exactly what you will get. When are you going to wake up?

Our "Sentimentality" Toward Children
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I was reading through Archaeology Magazine to which I regularly subscribe, when I came across this paragraph (Archaeology Jan/Fab 09, “Family Secrets” pg 51-52):

"Musco’s team kept looking. In the sarcophagus of one of the children, probably a girl aged eight, they found the complete ivory doll, parts of a second doll, and a pair of child's gold earrings. Fewer than 10 ivory dolls have been found in Italy for the entire Roman imperial period, and according to Maria Rosario Barbera of the Archaeological Superintendency of Rome, this doll is particularly refined because it would have had movable limbs. It is also latest Roman doll of such quality ever found. Ancient Roman dolls, like modern Barbie dolls, represent adult females, with hairstyles imitate those of the imperial family, allowing Barbera to date a doll to the Severan age (A.D. 193-235). Because of the high infant mortality rates in antiquity and a generally less sentimental view toward children than we have today, burials with valuable artifacts from a child's life are extremely rare. Often the items made from precious materials such as ivory would usually be passed on, rather than buried with a deceased child. The other children's sarcophagi were empty but for their bones. According to ancient toy expert Emilia Talamo, the presence of the ivory dolls in the tomb confirms the family's wealth."

We see this reflected in our society in that we stop school buses for even teenage kids so they can cross the street because of course, a 15 year old kid is now useless, right? Well, we say it is to protect them but if they still need protection and help crossing the street at 15, then I would say it is time to have them examined to see if they might be retarded or otherwise learning impaired.  We imagine that kids are helpless and need far more help and are capable of far less. They take that as a cue to start behaving that way. I will certainly deal more with this in an article about training kids soon, but for now, I state that our sentimentality does them far more harm than good.

I note the following as I used to walk regularly through a cemetery where I used to live and see it in other cemeteries that I visit. Parents and others leave toys, stuffed animals and other types of reminders of the children or childhood in general. I was visiting the graves of those buried at St. John's Cemetery in Halifax/Bedford Nova Scotia who had died on the Titanic. And someone or some family had put some small stuffed toys on the grave of one of the young children who died at sea. We are bothered a lot by children cut off from life too early and that is not a bad thing but again, if we are not to let strong emotions cloud our thinking and throw us off balance, we have to separate these emotions from consideration of this and look at it from objective reason and impartiality.

Children dying was far more common in previous times as noted in the article I quoted. Because of this, people had to toughen up or they would not be able to continue. Many tragedies befall most of us in our lifetimes and while it is a blow, we do need to go on and recover as best we can, especially if we have other children to care for. It could be our much more common rate of child survival that has spoiled us or made us overly sentimental. For while the loss of a child is tragic, I must point out that the loss of a parent of other loved adults and teens is not any better or more comforting. I also point out that in the Law of Moses, an adult was valued at far more if being redeemed, than was a very old person or a baby. God saw an adult with their accumulated wisdom and experience and their greater abilities being full grown, as being far more valuable in the eyes of God than those substantially older or younger. The least valued in the Law was a baby. I wonder what those against abortion would say about that!

In general, I think we make far more of a big deal about a child being harmed as opposed to an adult. Or we think a child being far less capable or accountable. When you consider that some kids are prodigies and can do some amazing feats, its shameful that we don't enable more of them to develop more and quicker, without pressure, of course. Today, we hold them back and hinder them.

Oddly, I think most kids are quite harsh toward each other, and much more willing to find fault than we adults do with them. I also find it odd that while we see child abuse of any sort to be horrible and it certainly is not a good thing to be said when one abuses those who are not strong enough to defend themselves, there are many who are as helpless and do not get the same sympathy though they should. They get brutally picked on by other kids. How is it that we do not seem to care that much about this situation? Kids can be traumatized and carry around lots of damage such abuse, a damage every bit as devastating as being raped or loosing a loved one in death. Yet we ignore that they go through all too often in school.

Think of how bad this teasing, tormenting and harassment can be that 2 young men (Kleybold and Harris, Columbine High) would choose to end their lives in revenge, rather than live on. I am not defending their actions nor do I think they picked the right ones to seek revenge on, but we make a serious mistake if we only blame the 2 boys and not take a very serious hard look at the rest of the youth in that school.

And this was hardly limited to Colorado. For a few years, it was happening all across the USA. Even Finland tried to copy us, by having a school shooting of their. There is no way they could compete with the USA. We are the most pathetic by far. Our kids are so far out of control. We should only blame our selves for not requiring much better behavior from our kids, with respect, consideration, and empathy for all. We clearly have not done that.

But time and again, in enforcing this so called zero tolerance, we continue to pick on the tormented and excuse the bullies. If a picked on kid should dare threaten to take revenge, we nearly execute them then and there, as if they were the cause. They are not the cause, they are a symptom of kids who have endured all they can and have been broken down or nearly so. What should be done is to find the principle tormentors and all tormentors and give them a good hard taste of zero tolerance. It is their viciousness and cruelty which know no limits or boundaries or mercy.

Again, we do not expect anything of kids as regards decent behavior so we let them run lose like animals and then defend them and blame the victims of the bullying. We are truly a very sick people. Why don't we go after bullies and tormentors? Because their parents are upper middle class or well to do and can obtain lawyers, money, and local political influence and school administrators don't want to go up against all that. And neither does anyone else, apparently. We are a nation of cowards and defenders of the worst evil.

So we say we care about kids, but I don't really see that, at all. I don't think we give a damn about them but we do give it lip service and token gestures of care, such as stopping school buses for 15 year old teens. Insane! The hypocrisy is too much to even comprehend. Kids who are cruel and torment deserve a good severe punishment. They should be given good training and affection, but also more accountability and expectation, with punishment when due. We put up with so much crap that we get nothing back but crap.

And elderly people? Old people are brought up in more innocent times and are more trusting. This makes them easier targets, as easy as children, to take advantage of. Certainly I have found some adults who are not that bright and may actually be slightly retarded or poorly educated and easily taken advantage of. And there are those who are weak or crippled, homeless, or other that may be more vulnerable than others. Taking advantage of these is just as horrible and objectionable as if it was a child.

Yet, we do seem to be largely indifferent to these groups, who are so vulnerable and powerless, every bit as much so as a child. But because they do not look like that in appearance, we do not give them the same gentle consideration we pretend to give to kids while we allow them to be so seriously hurt by other kids. Our hypocrisies are so many and so blatant, I am surprised God has not stamped us all out a long time ago. But clearly, we have an awful judgment coming and we need not wonder why Armageddon-Judgment Day is going to be so horrible. We sowed, so now we shall soon reap. You can take that to the bank!

I marvel at prisoners who take such offense to those who have taken advantage of children, which could mean something as benign as consensual sex with a teen as being far worse than their own offenses which could be violent murders, savage beatings or raping of women or other such extreme crimes. To me, crime is crime and I might point out that this is the way God sees it, as well. Rape is rape whether the girl is 8 or 80 and is punished the same. And murder is murder, regardless of the reason or intention for the murder. There are no age crimes prescribed in the Bible at all.

Now I also want to point out another contradiction. As I have just mentioned, kids see each other as being more capable and judge each other more intensely and even harshly. Parents and adults in the present see kids as being useless, incapable, and needing shelter rather than enlightenment. And they make all sorts of excuses for kids and expect them to not be responsible or accountable, as if it was good to not be responsible or accountable. Why not? We don't like to be responsible or accountable, either. Quite the disease, isn't it?

This is how social engineers and the media have indoctrinated us to believe. Don't ask anything of kids and let them stay stupid, hurt and traumatize each other so that they will be near useless as adults and easily manipulated and controlled. We go right along with it, with out ever giving it a thought as to whether it is right or not. It clearly is not.

But here is yet another contradiction. While we see kids in such a helpless and vulnerable state, which I do not believe is the case, we tend to speak to them without consideration or care. We speak of and emphasize our authority, but give little reason. We want obedience without question, even though we resent the same from those above us. We are not kind in the way we often speak to them. We do not warmly and kindly explain our reasons why we ask what we do. In fact, we usually don't have any good reason which is why we do not like to explain ourselves and do not like questions. No authority likes to be questioned, who does not have good reason, justice, and decency behind what they ask and do. We do not listen to our kids and certainly do not spend much time with them, other than serving as cab drivers to deliver them to their various activities or lessons. Everyone else spends time with our kids except us. Instructors, teachers, coaches, entertainers, TV, internet. Schools often even provide 2 of the kids meals a day, so we don't even cook that much for them. Kids barely know us and we barely know them.

So we have come to have little relevance in each other's lives and little influence as well. The only thing parents still do is earn the money to keep the kids funded while others care for the various instructions and influence. Ain't that nice of us parents to foot the bill for others to do as they please with our kids? So while we do not want just any old adults from influencing our kids, it is quite clear that all sorts of adults have their "way" with our kids. But whose way is it that is being forced on our kids? Is it what we want? How could that be? For I do not believe we know what we want! It is those who have shaped and molded our society and are in power who have chosen who the teachers will be over our kids and what will be taught and how. TV is controlled by the business and financial elite who also donate money to determine who gets elected as well. And those who coach or are responsible for most things our kids are involved with are usually carefully controlled.

They are capable of so little and yet we leave them to the influence of just about anyone. I guess we really don't care about them that much, do we? I am not sure why most parents even have kids since they seem to hate spending any time at all with them. Since they seem to learn and carry on without us, it would seem to me that they are independent. But our government schools or similar private schools like having our kids all to themselves to do with as they please. They teach the kids new and different ways to view things so that the kids become "theirs," so to speak. The kids' hearts are won over, though barely so.

Isolate and Brain Wash
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But in order to keep the kids as theirs (the government's), they want to make sure that no other people try to interfere with their exclusive access to the kids; exclusive, even of parents. So they want you to believe that anyone who has an interest in what your kids think or believe or do, has nothing but evil horrible intentions. Odd, for that is what I would suggest of those who currently have our kids all to themselves. Government brain washers, I mean, educators, know that good sound reasoning, especially when accompanied by warmth and good motivations, would wipe out the government's "teachings" fast. Educators could never compete for they only employ heartless suck-ups who have no conscience and will teach whatever they are told to, regardless of how void of goodness or usefulness it is.

There is no competing with truth, goodness, and love. Lies and ill intentions will lose out every time. So how better to keep out those with some good intention than to bad mouth and stigmatize anyone who should show an interest in our kids or you, for that matter. For really, adults aren't much brighter than their kids. So look around you and take note of those who are bad mouthed and vilified. They might well be your help against those who want to keep you in darkness and ignorance. How much do we really love our kids. Honestly, based on our actions and not our words, very little. We have given them over to others to bring up.

You see, those in power do not like open, free market competition of ideas because a free-market of competing ideas usually leads to the truth becoming known, desired, and adopted. They hate truth and the unbridled spread of knowledge and freedom of thought. Their system can only exist where they employ harsh censorship and control. But they are clever in that they do not make this censorship and control obvious. In fact, they will tell you that you are free and live in freedom and that they are so open and nice. But if you try to promote or expose truth, you will soon find out how free you are not!

Truth can never be defeated, if allowed the freedom of publicity. Lies have no power or effective against truth. Truth is a deadly virus or poison to lies and deceit. Truth is safety, protection, and life. Lies always become deadly, sooner or later. By their fruits you will recognize both truth and lies. They are not hard to tell apart if both are presented together. Lies will lose every time.

Now while it is quite easy to understand how someone might feel extra gentleness or nurturing toward a young child, God does not prescribe anything different for the harm to a child than He does for an adult. And given how children used to work jobs and before that, commonly work on the farm or shepherd the flock and otherwise be nearly identical in deeds to adults, one has to wonder why we changed in our attitudes since about 1860 onward. And it is even more odd that the USA resisted the change at first and then were forced to accept a new way and became resigned to it over time or even forgot that they ever resisted it in the past.

There were forces at work to deliberately change our attitudes and ways we handled our young. Why is an interesting question that will have to be answered later in another article. But those who created these changes were not doing so for our benefit or the benefit of the kids, though it was suggested that is was for the kids' benefit. It was for the benefit of government and big business, as it usually is when they suggest a change from the way something has been done for thousands of years previous. You'll hear that theme often in this article, even as you have already.

But we need to obey God, who gave parents the duty to raise and teach their kids. Indeed, we want to be suspicious of any adult who has an interest in our kids. That especially includes government adults who believe they know better than we do, how to care for our kids and want us to let them train our kids while we continue to be the ones who pay for it. At the very least, the government should be paying for the privilege of being allowed to teach our kids rather than us. Otherwise, teaching kids is not just our duty to God, but also our right as the parents who bear the kids and pay the expenses for raising them. Indeed, a well meaning government ought to have little to say about how we raise the kids or what we teach them. It is none of their business unless they are footing all the costs.

Do you really love your kids? Then spend time with them, raise them, teach them, instead of leaving it all to someone else. Otherwise, why bother to have them at all if you're only going to let others do the caring for them? And give your kids more credit for having a brain and being capable and responsible. They were before 1860 and they can be again.

Learning Needed Early & Fast
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Kids are going to face many things at earlier ages than we might prefer but whether we prefer it or not, it will happen. In the wild jungle, young animal babies have to learn quite fast how to survive or they can end up as a meal for a predator. It is not that much different for our kids. Learn fast or perhaps die. They need to know how to watch out for traffic, avoid suspicious situations and offers, cope with bullies, defend their rights, etc. They need to know and learn as soon as is possible. That is for their own advantage, protection, and survival.

But we take the lazy or irresponsible approach and often are slow to teach or even neglectful to teach at all. For starters, we leave most education to others, to schools. Some leave everything up to schools and do nothing, otherwise. But schools only teach academic things. Things like morals, manners, handling money, and even street smarts and experience, all need to be taught to children. And when it comes to sex, we are uncomfortable, if not terrified, and are afraid that too much knowledge would be harmful.

Well, I am all for just answering what they ask and perhaps nothing more in some instances, but many parents have avoided the subject and resorted to the old cabbage patch story, or the stork, or some other device. I do not believe in lying to kids. That can destroy the parent's credibility and breaks the bonds of trust. Why lie about sex anyway, unless you are ashamed of it. I believe shame about marital sex is also wrong. God said it was good in Genesis 1.

I was told by someone who lived on a farm full of animals that kids do not take long to get the idea of sex there. Animals are frequently seen doing it and so either the parents are able to explain it or the kids will soon figure it out anyway. Ignorance is not possible on a farm full of animals and really, neither is it possible in our sex crazed society today. We tell them or they will find out elsewhere.

Our Hang-ups Hinder Us
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We do tend to be very hung up, ourselves, in regards to sex. Most people tend to view sex as something shameful, dirty, and disgusting to hide from the kids. Mind you, mom and dad like sex but only for them. They can't bear and dread the day when their little girl is going to want to do it. They detest the idea of her doing something vulgar and grossly abusive such as sex. Where did they get such insane ideas? Well, I discuss that in other articles appearing at the end of this one. But the attitude is clearly there.

Whereas, the Bible's view is the opposite. Sex was designed and created by God and is supposed to be desired and enjoyed. In this way, it encourages marriage and reproduction. But we have perverted the Bible and made God out to be a pervert, a sicko, and thoroughly disgusting in what He created our daughters and sons to do. When a boy has sex with a girl, it is automatically seen as an assault, as an attack, something intended to be hurtful and degrading. But modern day teens do not seem to see it that way.

We need to re-examine our attitudes and correct them and bring them into harmony with God's view and not Augustine's, the Catholic Church's, Victoria's view, or the FBI's. They are sick and warped but God's view is pure, clean, holy, and righteous.

Sex is beautiful, exciting, thrilling, warm, wonderful, desirable, healthy, and beneficial, especially in the psychological sense. It is to be desired and pursued, but according to God's instructions, and not by our own ways. So there is nothing wrong with girls being interested in boys. That is to be expected.

I recall a time at a lake when a little boy of about 3 was being undressed and changed into other clothes by his mother at the lake. For several minutes he was completely naked. What was fascinating was that a little girl of about 1.5 years or a little more from another family and was totally intrigued by this naked boy and pleased to behold such a sight and came right up to him. She could barely walk and not talk at all, but she knew she liked what she saw. The expression of delight in her face was plain to see. So obvious was it that she was delighted and amazed, that the little boy, sensing this, assumed that maybe he should hold her hand which is what he did. He understood she was attracted and responded as he thought he was supposed to. The parents came and got the little girl but one can clearly see the natural instinct and fascination, even barely out of the womb.

But parents are terrified of such an instinct in most cases. They will overreact and sometimes show hostility, fear, and condemnation toward a child showing some fascination or interest. The child quickly learns to hide such attraction and fascination and pursue it in secret, behind the parent's back, and with shame, too, perhaps. No wonder we are all screwed up. It should not overly concern us that such attraction and interest exists. It is part of God's plan and design. It is He who gave us that instinct.

Parents Are Neglectful of Duties
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The next problem is the parents neglected any sort of preparation for the day when their little girl would suddenly become overtly sexual in her thoughts and behavior after puberty begins and even before it begins. So when it happens, they are more terrified and unprepared than ever. How do we control our daughter now, they ask? Oh no, she will want to do horrible things with boys or even worse, men! Yeah, she probably will in time. Since many girls go through puberty at 12 to 15, and because 10 or 12 years can fly when you get older and become a parent, that day can come upon you much faster than expected. Before you hardly got started, that day has arrived and you are no where near ready. Whose fault is that? The fear explodes and the parents often become irrational and unrealistic.

At this point, a son or daughter is frustrated because they can sense the fear and disapproval of them wanting to seek out and enjoy the company of the opposite sex. They experience the disapproval of their new sexual identity from their parents. Conflict, fights, tension, and rebellion are now rites of passage for most teens. Many teens will become secretive and develop secret double lives, one they show to their parents and another they show to their friends. The parents suddenly become the child's enemy since they can not and will not accept the child's new identity and desires. The parents try to suppress and deny the sexuality of their kids. The parents are at a total loss of what to do. The only thing they tend to do is make things worse.

The Problems of New Behavior
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The parents have two problems. First, they never taught or prepared their kids to live within God's rules adequately. Or if they are not Christian and even if they are, they may not have supplied their kids with good reasons why they need to be married before having sex or abstaining for a limited time. If they did not give good sound reasons, then the kids will pursue sex behind the parent's backs. So they failed to reach the kid's minds and hearts before the hormones kicked in; and it will be, and is, much more difficult after the hormones kick in. So they lack any sort of effective sound preparation for starters.

Second, the world that the "kids" live in does not allow for them to get married at a young age so as to be able to satisfy their newly found desires. We don't live on the farm anymore, so our fates and financial destinies are not in our own control anymore. We depend on a system that gives us whatever it wants and that is not much anymore. It is very hard to make a living at any age but especially if you are not 18 yet. We don't like or want "kids" to be responsible or independent. We like them dependant and controlled. We are totalitarian dictators over "kids."

Not surprisingly, they don't like it anymore since finding their new sense of identity. We would not like it as adults, either. These teens feel like they should be entitled to be treated more like adults. I have to agree with them, as long as they also accept full responsibility for their lives in every way as an adult has to do.

Kids Are Very Capable
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We tragically underestimate what kids can do and want to do anyway. Look at Jessica, a 7 year old girl who could fly a plane back in the late 80's, was it? After her plane crashed and all 3 people died, an investigation was made. It was found that Jessica had not flown the plane at take off and was not in anyway responsible for the crash. The father and the trainer had overloaded the plane and caused its crash. But what was the first thing the people and the law did? Let's stop kids from flying! Why? Jessica had been doing just fine. It was the stupid adults who were at fault. But no one wanted to see a kid accomplish anything significant. Heck, it might catch on. And before you know it, they might marry or go to college at 14 or even begin a family at that age. God forbid!

I know that some were scared that someone might try to teach a kid of an even younger age than 7. And I agree that this was a possibility but why not limit it to 6? Why push it up to 18? Why do we hate to see kids do marvelous things? What is it that wants us to keep kids from doing, learning, accomplishing, growing, succeeding, thriving? How dare they grow up and mature and develop! And learning to be responsible and accountable as well! We seem to want to keep them eternally as helpless, ignorant infants who never progress until 18 and then, magically, overnight, they suddenly know it all and can do it all. Or is it just the governments that want this? You tell me!

They need to begin learning, trying, and succeeding as young and early as possible. Most things should be taught before they even hit puberty. Because when they hit that, they will want to move on and have a relationship. They need to be ready for it. Why? Because they will not allow themselves to be denied, even if they are not ready and not being realistic about what it takes to live in the real world and earn a living.

They are not kids anymore, when they arrive at puberty, providing it is not unusually early as does happen in some rare instances. I am speaking primarily of 12 or older. These 12 and older, sexually mature in a physical sense people are now young men and women as even the Jews seem to wisely recognize, at least in a limited sense. This has always been the case among tribal peoples where a 12 or 13 year old boy could be a capable hunter and provider of his tribe. A girl of the same age could potentially even be a mother and certainly start sharing the duties of the women of the tribe.

So they deserve to be recognized as more than just kids at this point. But we like to phrase them as kids. In fact, when I read the papers, I see 17 year old "girls" referred to as "little girls," I laugh. It is absolutely absurd. No 17 year old is little or incapable of a relationship. Why do you think they date? They are far from being little girls anymore. But we do not respect what these teens potentially represent. We long ago forgot what it was like to be their age. Many a mother liked to fool around when they were teens, but God forbid if their daughter should want to do so. Don't do as I did, dear, do as I say. I doubt that will work, though.

But back to my earlier point, many teens would be willing to take up a job, earn a living, and be responsible. But the law and the parents absolutely forbid it! Can you give me one good reason why we should not want our kids to grow up, be responsible, earn a living, and get married? Why do we hate responsibility so much? Is it any wonder kids do not become responsible? We discourage and prohibit it for ourselves and them. Ourselves in that we don't bother to adequately teach and prepare our kids for their teen years. It makes no sense.

The law and the system do not allow a teen to work. We call that a violation of child labor laws. Well, yes, if we are talking about actual children and not teens, who are far more than just kids. The law is supposed to protect small children from becoming 3rd world sweat shop labor. But what are we protecting teens from? Are we really protecting them or are we cursing them? Maybe we are hindering them and slighting them in reality.

An Inequitable System
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The excuse is that we want to have them get an education so they can get a good job. Well, here is the problem. Any job that needs to be done is a good job and deserves good pay, the kind of pay that would allow them to support themselves and a small family. But the rich and powerful in our world don't believe that such work merits enough to deserve a family.

Consider these stern warnings from God.

1 Thessalonians 5:12 But we beseech you, brethren, to respect those who labor among you and are over you in the Lord and admonish you, 13 and to esteem them very highly in love because of their work. Be at peace among yourselves.

Luke 10:7 And remain in the same house, eating and drinking what they provide, for the laborer deserves his wages

Romans 4:4 Now to one who works, his wages are not reckoned as a gift but as his due.

1Timothy 5:18 for the scripture says, "You shall not muzzle an ox when it is treading out the grain," and, "The laborer deserves his wages."

James 5:4 Behold, the wages of the laborers who mowed your fields, which you kept back by fraud, cry out; and the cries of the harvesters have reached the ears of the Lord of hosts.

Leviticus 19:13 "You shall not oppress your neighbor or rob him. The wages of a hired servant shall not remain with you all night until the morning.

Jeremiah 22:13 "Woe to him who builds his house by unrighteousness, and his upper rooms by injustice; who makes his neighbor serve him for nothing, and does not give him his wages;

Malachi 3:5 "Then I will draw near to you for judgment; I will be a swift witness against the sorcerers, against the adulterers, against those who swear falsely, against those who oppress the hireling in his wages, the widow and the orphan, against those who thrust aside the sojourner, and do not fear me, says the LORD of hosts.

It is a most detestable thing to God not to give a laborer his due wages. If he works, he deserves to eat and have a family. We live in a very wicked, evil world where we do not believe in paying a man a decent wage for work. Because the work is simple or unchallenging, or not requiring great knowledge, then we believe the man doing that work is not worthy of living wage for a small family. I would disagree in the strongest terms imaginable.

In fact, when women began to enter the workplace offices, it was felt that since they were not supporting a family, that they did not deserve as much pay. I seriously doubt any woman will say that was right. Indeed, it was very wrong. It is not whether you need it or not. It should be equal pay for equal work. And any work should merit a decent living wage, even if it is not needed and is just extra income. Were it possible, I would love to see a world where only 1 person in a relationship had to work so the other could stay home and do the work that piles up there. I would be happy to stay home and let the woman work there if she liked. But there is enough work at home to keep whoever stays there, busy. Kids will take up most of our time or at least, they should if we taught them instead of someone else doing our job.

And if a teen wanted to marry and have a family, then they should be able to work and get fairly and reasonably paid for their labor. When nature calls, I think teen males would often be happy to begin a family. That we have poorly anticipated and prepared them for this, both by not creating the right laws or allowing our laws to be changed to stop it, and by not preparing kids to adequately handle the transition to married life and raising kids. Why, most parents had no idea how to raise kids so how could they prepare their own? And you will note that our schools do not help us in this area for they prefer our ignorance and lives of chaos so that we are more easily manipulated and misled.

Now if the government had our best interests in mind, they would want relationships to be successful so that society and the world would run smooth, efficient, peaceful, orderly. But governments have always served big rich corporate interests who want to exploit and abuse labor so we do not provide for jobs so that teens might marry to accommodate their newly acquired sexual development. They keep teens in school for "training" although one must wonder exactly what the goals of that training are since we did not need it past puberty for the last 6000 years and do not really need it for any job and used to get our job training on the job when industry first came into being.

What kind of world is it where we belittle labor and disrespect it? What kind of world have we left and passed on to our kids? We and our ancestors have let our kids down, tragically. We should be ashamed and embarrassed to even look them in the eyes. We are thoroughly disgusting, pathetic, and irresponsible for letting our political representatives represent us so poorly and do so little for us. They should be hanging for crimes and treason against citizens of this country if we were to make them accountable but as you can see from the least to the worst, we have all failed miserably at being responsible and accountable.

Nor would I recommend that Christians take action against their political representatives now. Let God take care of this mess. It is beyond us and God wants us to stay out of it. But our failures have been substantial. Our young men and women, teens, should be able to work and live. That they can not is the fault of those who did not do more to secure better treatment when the industrial phenomenon took hold of this country and we left the farms. It is also the fault of we who came after and did nothing to improve the system for our children who come after us. Maybe we all ought to be hanging from trees, too. God may really judge many of us if we do not repent of our sins. Think about it!

Don't Grow Up, You Say?
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Some may feel that we are asking our teens to grow up too fast. Really? Are you suggesting that growing up and accepting responsibility sucks? I thought it was a good thing. So maybe you think that life sucks? Could be. I kind of think it does. But whose fault is that? Its ours! And we have chosen not to improve our world but only bitch about it and wish our kids didn't have to face it. But they do and the faster they prepare for it the better. I also believe it is still possible to find some happiness in a rotten world. Why prolong finding happiness, achieved through coping with life? Any answers?

Besides, I believe most teens want their independence and would welcome a chance to work, have their won place, be their own boss, live their own life, and be married, if that was the only option that society offered for acceptable sexual relations. I don't think it is the teens who are resisting. It is only our world and parents who dread the kids getting independent. We prefer to be slaves to industry and government.

So now our kids may get into their 30's before they are adequately established in a financial way, if at all. A good portion of people will never be well established financially, even though they work hard, and so will not be able to have a family or have one without great hardship, struggle, deprivation, and depression. So we recommend waiting ridiculously long periods after puberty has commenced and have our children seek an education long into adulthood when we should be having kids and a home already.

We have this odd concept of education that seems to require that all learning be done in their youth as long as it is not too young, right? But I see learning as something that can and should take place throughout life. And there is no reason why one can not start up again after taking a break. In fact, I believe it might be better to do it that way. You have a better idea of what you might want to do or give a try. A change of life might be nice after a while. But all personal growth and education should be an individual responsibility and perhaps one of the community as well. If we had preserved all the accumulated wisdom we had acquired through our family lines, racial lines, and other such related social attachments, we could learn what we needed from our parents and community without schools or government help, much less big business and industry, who only want to hurt and exploit us.

But industry wants to influence the young while they are young and have not gathered a lot of wisdom yet. Having lots of wisdom makes it hard for others to influence those with wisdom. So get them young before they get any wisdom and we can count on the help of parents who never bother to share much of their wisdom anyway.

But there is no question that there are lots of changes that need to be made to our world and system, as well as our own attitudes. But we owe that to our children. I recommend that the fanatics who expend extravagant amounts of time and resources on protesting abortions, try diverting some of that time to reducing unwed teen mothers with unwanted children by eliminating one of the main causes of unprepared teen pregnancies by changing the world to allow teens to marry so that abortion would be a lot less necessary. How's that for forward thinking, pro-active vision?

It is true that we can't change the world over night or suddenly make it like it was 150 years ago. But we can begin to try to make it better. It may take quite a while but first we need to recognize that there is a serious problem, in fact, many problems, that relate to a lot more than just sex. But to say that you are not going to try because it is too much of a mess is a cop out and irresponsible, which we have had too much of, already. We need to start by accepting responsibility for the education of our own children at very early ages so that they are ready for bigger things by 12 or 13.

Don't Make Them Grow Up So Fast
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Many will offer the excuse that young people need to experience life and enjoy it before they settle down. They speak as if being married or having a family were a burden and torture. Makes you wonder, doesn't it? But what is it that they can or should experience before marrying and having a relationship? Freedom? Freedom to do what? Play around? You mean screw around, don't you? Isn't that what the Bible forbids?

OK, lets see if there is anything else. Freedom to learn, pursue education, travel, avoid responsibility, etc. Well, it all sounds like fun and is quite harmless, but is it so much more desirable than finding a partner and being in love? More importantly, are they going to be able to avoid temptation and remain clean in the eyes of God? The problem as I see it is, that while being free of heavy burdens such as bills, payments, and mortgages, they are not free of desires and temptations. If the freedom is that good that they want to resist or put off a relationship, that is great, but I remain skeptical.

What bothers me even more is how we see kids as a burden and a drag. It should not be that way but I suspect another article will be needed to address that. To me, growing up and getting married is a good thing, not a bad thing. A relationship where God is involved, should be a blessing, not a curse or punishment. I think it all needs to be reconsidered. Our purpose, as given by God in Genesis 1 is to marry, be fruitful, multiply, and fill the earth. It was and is the will of God for everyone to eventually marry and reproduce. We were meant to be reproductive creatures.

Now yes, that changed with the advent of the Kingdom of God announced by John and Jesus, the dynamic duo, if ever there was one. They began to offer another course and pursuit, in serving God in the harvest, so to speak, becoming a figurative eunuch for the sake of the interests of the Kingdom. But becoming parents is not wrong, either. But it is now far more precarious to become parents in such an unstable economy and world. Count the costs carefully.

To make sure that we did so, to reward us for doing so, God created a means for couples to relate to each other in such a way as to provide lots of pleasure and satisfaction. I am sure He intended child care to be genuinely rewarding, too. If they are not, then you must be doing something wrong. So let those young people marry. But prepare them before hand, that's all.

Nature Is Calling!
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But how ridiculous to ask kids to refrain from sex for the first 30 years of their life. In fact, their best and most beautiful and appealing years will be the years in their teens till 30. After that, much of their youthful beauty and looks will be gone. That's a terrible time to get married after most of your market appeal has withered. How insane is that? What are you people thinking? In fact, even our desire for sex seems to begin to wither in our 30's, a little. And it gets progressively worse with each decade of age.

I am not saying that there is not more to marriage and a relationship than looks. There is, but to ignore the looks factor and especially ignore that one's best and healthiest years for reproducing are from about 14 to 30, in the case of females, is blind and stupid. Why are young people supposed to ignore each other when they are at their best and most appealing? Why do they or are they expected to wait until a good deal of their appeal has faded at age 30. I have seen many lose their good looks in their mid or late 20's, if not earlier. It can go fast. And how is it that when they are at their peak of sexual desire as well, that they are to ignore all those very powerful impulses and drives while their youth quickly fades away. We must be out of our minds. We are clearly not thinking or using our heads.

When you are young, a few years can seem like forever. Having to wait till 25 or 30? It almost never happens. No wonder fornication is so common. Waiting till 25 or 30 for sex? Its about as common as visits from Haley's comet or ice ages. We are being so inconsiderate and cruel if we expect our kids to go till 25 or more without sex. The God given urge is just too strong and overpowering. Most will simply resort to non-marital sex, better known in the Bible as fornication.

God wants to prevent kids from being born without 2 loving parents and solid support for the necessities of life and plenty of love and nurturing. Sexual disease can be a problem, too. Further, God does not want to see people hurt by being used for sex or lied to about it. A lot of hurt and damage can be done to a person by breaking up with them after becoming sexually intimate. It can make them bitter, jaded, and less capable of being loving in future relationships. God hates all forms of abuse. So there is more than enough reason to be honorable about having an interest in someone.

So it should be the single greatest concern of Christian parents to see to it that their kids have the best possible world or situation for their kids? To find a suitable means of satisfying their God given appetites for sexual relations at the earliest possible time within reason? But this has been anything but the case. Parents instead think their kids should be able to wait for practically forever or even go without. Another case of don't do as I do, do as I say.

We say we love our kids but really, we hate them and expect the most ridiculous things from them, except responsibility. We want our daughters to be the virgin Mary forever because we hate the idea of a guy having sex with them, ever! We don't want to them to marry, at least for 30 years. Yeah, that'll happen. And the dish will run away with the spoon and the fork and the cow will jump over the moon, too.

What Do We Do?
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Well, we can't change our world to make it better. God said it would go from bad to worse. Evil rules the world. But other peoples have managed. In the Soviet Union, 3 generations would and do live in one house or apartment. Well, even patriarchal societies such as those in the Bible did that on a routine basis. True, it is definitely not the way Americans have typically done it but that is apt to change as "they" try to bring us down to the level of 3rd world nations. So a young couple could live with one of the couple's parents. You don't like that idea? Would you prefer they go out and violate God's laws and end up with God's disapproval, unwanted pregnancies, or even Herpes 2 or AIDS? Not to mention, God's judgment and destruction, too!

Matthew 5:29 But if your right eye offends you, take it out and throw it from you, for it is profitable to you that one of your members should perish and all your body not be thrown into Hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to offend, cut it off and throw it from you, for it is profitable to you that one of your members should perish and all your body not be thrown into Hell.

I think Jesus' point here is that you should do whatever it takes to get yourself and your kids into the kingdom of God and have God's approval. No price is too high, and no discomfort to hard to bear. If you got to all live in the same house, do it. But know this, most teens and young adults, no matter how much they love God and want to do right, are not going to be able to deny their sexual urges too long. Either find an acceptable partner for them or prepare for the worst.

Now the other possibility is that your precious teen daughter could take up with someone older than herself, someone who might be able to provide enough income and security. But most hate the idea of a real man "doing" something to their daughter, as if sex was some ugly horrible and vile act of defilement instead of love and pleasure for both partners.

But I have shown that the Bible does not disapprove of age differences. It is not perverted. In fact, if truth be told, teen girls usually mature, both mentally and emotionally, faster than boys and generally prefer young men in their 20s or early 30s as opposed to boys who are also teens. And if it were not so stigmatized and frowned upon, most girls would probably prefer guys in their 20's. Girls seem to prefer a little more maturity than teen boys could usually offer.

Youth IS Beauty at its best!
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Now some will think that men in their 20's are perverted for finding teen girls beautiful and desirable. That is crazy. The human brain is designed to respond to secondary sexual characteristics such as breasts, widened hips, etc. This is instinct at work, not perversion. It is the nature of man as God gave it to him. And their response favors those in their best health and appearance. Younger always looks better. The condition of the skin and the firmness of their bodies is always the best at their earliest ages of maturity and you know it! We only get worse with age.

It has been noted on shows like Desmond Morris' TV series, The Human Animal, or The Human Sexes, (I can't recall which but likely the latter) that signs of secondary sexual characteristics and youth combined are signals that alert us, attract us, and signal good breeding material. In both sexes, signs of youth are signs of health, energy, and beauty. They are immediately and instinctively appealing to all ages. Youthful firm skin is much more appealing than old, wrinkled, darkened, and sagging skin. It was God's intention that skin always be firm, wrinkle free, and soft. We were always to remain young looking forever. But Adam threw that away for us all in the Garden of Eden and so now we age and die.

Youthful bodies are usually or more often firm, sleek, toned, free of sagging or excessive fat. They are much more desirable than old, infirm, sagging bodies. In every way, youthful looks are always more appealing than old looks. Old looks are not natural, not signs of health, and do not portend good things. They are a result of break down and eventual death. They are not part of God's plan and never were. Aging physically, is not a good thing, but a bad thing. Yes, gaining wisdom and experience is good but getting older and less healthy is never good or desirable unless you are sick in the head.

The idea of older people finding youthful looks beautiful is only right. Who of you older people would not prefer to look youthful and feel young and full of energy? Why should it be perverted because we want to look as God intended us to look? Why is it perverted that we should want our wife or husband to also look and keep or get back their youthful beauty and appeal? Then why would it be perverted to see someone young as beautiful and desirable. That is what God intended all along, anyway, to last forever! Is God a pervert, too, oh wise ones?

The Bible book of Job brings up an interesting point. In Job 33:24, Job brings up the resurrection and one of its particular aspects.

Job 33:24 and he [God] is gracious to him [man], and says, 'Deliver him from going down into the Pit [death], I have found a ransom [Jesus]; 25 let his [man's] flesh become fresh with youth; let him return to the days of his youthful vigor.'

This is the hope many of us await for. The time when we will be brought back to life, or avoid destruction at Armageddon and be returned to the ultimate state of youth, health, and vigor that Adam and Eve first had. In particular, note how man's flesh, his skin in particular, becomes fresh with youth. No longer will it be wrinkled, blemished, sag, or bloated with fat. Our youthful energy and vigor will return, too. Why shouldn't it be desirable, even now while we do not have it? Isn't that why we are excited about God's kingdom and looking forward to it? Isn't that what makes dying for God worth it all? Knowing we will be back and better than ever before? That's what keeps me going!

So why do we continue to object to young men liking teen girls like it was such an odd thing to desire such beauty and appeal? It is just a sickness of the mind that has been passed on and not given much thought. Now while some may concede that a teen girl is very appealing, they may argue that she is not mature enough. Surely we can not be talking about sexual maturity or desire because it is really beyond argument that no one, of either male or female sex, is any more appealing than when they have just completed puberty. For that is when they are closest to a state of physical perfection, when they are aged in a negative sense of break down, the least. Each year of age will bring a little more decline in our looks and health. It is just a hard fact of aging and dying.

In fact, if you want to get right down to it, we are by far at our most healthy and least flawed, as newborn babies. A baby or a child of 2 or 3 will rarely have any blemishes or even freckles. If they have any at all, due to genetics, they will be very light when they are young. Each year will bring a little more breakdown and imperfection as we age, beginning as soon as we are born. Yes, we begin the path toward dying as soon as we are conceived. The genetic process will be on its ever declining way to total breakdown.

So if Adam had not sinned and caused us to break down, we would always have the same beautiful, clear, and soft skin we had as babies. So really, the skin of a teen will not be as perfect or as unflawed as it was as a baby or little toddler. But it will be much better than it will be 10 years after puberty, I assure you. The same would go with body fat. Many kids are not seriously obese until after puberty. So it is very natural that teens are much closer to perfection and much further from genetic decline than they are when 20 or 25. And it is also natural that this should be more attractive and desirable to anyone of any age. And anyone of any age should prefer a younger healthier state than a later broken down one. That would be as God had planned it.

Think of this. Watch Hollywood movies and see how actresses are made up, especially if they are in their 30's or 40's. Then catch a candid look at them in the National Enquirer or some other similar Hollywood gossip paper or magazine. They have lots of makeup on in the movie, right? And what appearance is it they are trying to portray? Both beauty and youth! First, the older they are, the more the director will want to hide wrinkles and skin discoloration, especially if they are playing a youthful role. Wrinkles and discoloration are not attractive.

They even wear lots of makeup as teens and in their 20's. Why? They want to hide freckles, blemishes, scars or any other aberrations of the skin. Clear, smooth skin is the ultimate in beauty and they all know it. Its no secret in Hollywood. So the illusion that Hollywood constantly tries to maintain is one of youthful, clear, tight skin, all of which are hallmarks of beauty and desirable to any man of any age. And all women of all ages would like to have such skin. It could not be more evident than it is in the dream making, illusion creating, movie filming capital of the world, Hollywood!

Beauty Is THE Drug!
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It really is! And I got the science to prove it, as well as observational evidence all around us. I'll state this as well. Beauty is a fundamental, universal, and all pervasive principle of all nature and the universe. Yeah, that is some big talk but I can back it up. Just watch me! I got this quite a few years back when I was giving this subject more attention. It takes a while sometimes, for m to get around to things. Priorities often hold some stuff back.

>> Delphi Forums
Forum:    the Christian Aaa Bible Study Forum
Subject:  Study Finds Female Beauty Is A Male Drug
From:     Bob (BOBBYLEE7)
To:       (ALL)
DateTime: 11/9/01 4:37:26 PM

Study finds female beauty is male drug. Brain scans show a man's reaction to seeing beautiful women is similar to an addict's when he get his fix. The study seems to be proof feminine beauty affects the male brain at its most basic level. Pictures of attractive women activated the same reward circuits in the brains of heterosexual men as food and cocaine. The study may help prove we are born knowing what is beautiful and what is not. Dan Ariely, of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and a co-author of the study, said: "This is hard-core circuitry. Beauty is working similar to a drug." In a second, related study, men were shown random pictures of women for several seconds, but could extend or cut the viewing time by pressing keys on a keypad. Attractive women were viewed an average of 8.7 seconds while others were viewed for 5.2 seconds. The men worked frantically to keep the beautiful women on the screen, each pressing the keyboard an average of more than 6,700 times in 40 minutes. A researcher said: "These guys look like rodents bar-pressing for cocaine." Researchers at Harvard Medical School and Massachusetts General Hospital have published their work in the journal Neuron.
I got more!
>>Saturday, April 04, 2009. 8 PM, Discovery Channel, The Science of Sexual Appeal - Episode 1  ( What follows is very close to the script of the show)

Said to be the science of sex appeal. Each to his own, right? Wrong! Sex appeal is not a matter of taste, It is a biological imperative. Evolution is driving how we pick partners, and science can prove it. We are hardwired to read genetic clues in a potential mate. Face body shape and sway and voice. And it looks as if women have an even more complex sexual agenda than men.

So we used to think that a mate’s preferences were something completely arbitrary; that beauty was in the eye of the beholder. In recent years, the evidence is suggesting, that is probably not the case, there are lots of things going on non-consciously that we have no control of. Beauty is not arbitrary! What is handsome is not arbitrary! All around the world men and women find certain things attractive and other things less attractive. We all operate according to a genetic playbook.

The program points out our attraction to the face being most prominent and seemingly based on the golden ratio first discovered by the Greeks, of 1.6 to 1. It is a common ration proportion found in much of nature’s structures.

The program also addressed the face, the body, the voice, and more. I have more notes for the asking but I have enough here to make my case. There is much more research, often shared on documentary TV, verifying this very same thing. It is no secret any longer, if it ever was. In ancient times, they understood this was man's nature. Only in our corrupt times do we like to suggest that we should have completely control and mastery over everything we like or choose, as if we did it after some deliberate thought-out contemplating on the matter. In truth, we are moved by our instinct. We don't choose whether its a slender shapely body or a fat one. That choice is made for us and we just follow.

Our tastes may expand or shrink or evolve, but it will all be without our conscious awareness of it. Its all done for us by that sub-conscious, hidden away part of our brain, often referred to in the Bible as our "heart" and the "flesh." It is our instinct and very far from our conscious understanding. But evil ones of darkness have decided to use our instinct against us and give us no consideration for our pre-disposed vulnerability to certain "influences" such as beauty and more. More on this later.

>>Parade Magazine, pg. 14, Nov. 26, 2006 , by Augustus Brown - Why Chickens Like Pretty Girls   ... and other bizarre animal stories

"Chickens have been tested to see how they react to human faces. The ones they prefer are consistent with human sexual preferences. In other words, chickens like beautiful people best."

"Most females find messy males unattractive, and the female knot-tying weaverbird is no exception: She will refuse to mate with a male who has built a shoddy nest. If spurned, the male must take apart the nest and rebuild it to win the female's affections."

"The pickiest creatures of all may well be female California fiddler crabs: A study found that they inspected an average of 23 male crabs' burrows before choosing a mate. One unattached female looked at 106 before she was satisfied."


I have also come across reports, which I was not able to take notes for over the years, how many animals will react different to children, especially very young ones. In fact, it is a report in many places of history of how some animals will adopt a human baby if it is lost or abandoned. An ape or chimp once rescued a boy who fell into the nest of the animals and placed it at the door for the keepers. Wolves and dogs have card for kids. I read of a Rhino that would not hesitate to kill adults but a 9 year old girl, cute and non-threatening, could do as she pleased in the presence of the Rhino with no fear or danger. That one was from the early 80s, National Enquirer. I know other animals have also responded to beauty as well as other things.

So what is amazing about this is, not only is this a human instinct and behavior, it is one in the animal kingdom and even beyond that, this infatuation with beauty crosses over the boundaries of one species and into another. It has absolutely no limits. A fundamental principle of all life! That is pervasive if ever there was such a thing! A universal constant!

Now consider that if this is instinct and acts like a drug, very much so, then how are we to treat our fellow human beings, knowing this predisposition is out there? You see, I have to deliberately seek out alcohol or drugs if I were to want them. But with beauty, I have no choice. It is automatically around me at all times. And when you add in, not only the visual aspects, but also voice, warmth, charm, or other such personality traits that are also instinctively appealing; why it would be the equivalent of someone coming up to you, rendering you helpless while they forcibly inject you with a strong drug.

Would it be your fault if some came and stuck a needle in you and got you high against your will? I don't see how! So there is a vulnerability we all have to beauty, charm, warmth, acceptance, and other such things. Listen, many cults and unhealthy religions know this and employ techniques whereby they shower you with open warmth, caring, affection, acceptance and the like and it is overwhelming for many and extremely effective. That is why these religions and cults continue and often thrive. People are hungry, desperate for human acceptance and contact and will take nearly anything.

Dr. Arthur Janov, in his book, The Biology of Love, points out that love causes large releases of the brain and bodies most powerful internal natural narcotic, Oxytocin! Quite very literally, love is a drug. All types of love! We all need it and crave it and because of it, are often vulnerable to situations we might not anticipate. We are also vulnerable to liars and deceivers who can use this knowledge and the "love" tactics that they do not really mean sincerely, to gain our trust and acceptance. Once they have it, they can then begin to manipulate us. It happens in all sorts of different relationship settings. By the way, Arthur Janov is the greatest psychologist of all time and I have written some stuff on him on this site. I definitely recommend you get acquainted with his work.

Are We to Blame?
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How powerful is beauty and the flesh? Well, according to Dr. Drew Pinski, a psychologist and I might add, a very good one and a favorite of Hollywood and TV, because he is good, points out that of all the addictions, Sex addiction is the most difficult to treat and overcome. I have come across a number of Christian (at least in name) preachers and the like who also say that the flesh is the most powerful and unlike any other addiction on earth. I completely agree! I say this is because we can not avoid being exposed to all aspects of it and, because it is not a choice, it is a very powerful instinct and drive from the deepest parts of our brain, the so called "heart" in the Bible.

Now, instead of someone coming up to you with a needle in hand and shooting you with drugs without your consent or will, suppose someone comes up to you and lies and deceived you into giving up you money, or getting you to relax your guard so they can get you into a private situation whereby they rob, rape, or whatever to you? Its still a crime, right? Even more hideous to many is when a child or old feeble person is lied to and tricked into something bad or harmful. Now here we go.

What if someone comes up to you with a very powerful weapon and threatens you? Is that fair or nice? In the face of such fear, we may agree to do things, not because we want to but because we fear for our lives or fear of physical harm and pain. But now, suppose, rather than being threatened with a weapon, you are threatened with your greatest weakness and vulnerability. Suppose you had an temporary outside pacemaker and it was threatened to be taken.

Or how about this. Suppose the one thing you loved more than anything else, true and intoxicating beauty, or warm accepting kindness and concern and someone offered that in exchange for something else, maybe your money or a favor or whatever? Is it fair or decent? Not hardly! It is cruel and evil. Yet it is done all the time, ever as rape and murder are. Consider this one, though! Suppose a young woman of incredible beauty and charm approaches, seemingly innocently, and pretends to be totally nuts over you. And let me explain that better first.

Among various entertainment stars, there are what we call groupies. Groupies can be plain but sometimes still very compelling, due to the extreme attention and "worship" they lavish upon a star. Even more tempting is the really attractive ones, who want the big trophy and they have decided you are it. They also pull out all stops to win you, overwhelm you with devotion and admiration. Look, many stars know it is foolish to risk or accept it, and yet . . . they do it anyway because the worship feels so good that even if they suspect its just to get them into bed, it works. Its too hard to pass up and reject. The devotion and enthusiasm these girls can put forth is remarkable and very effective, too. Those who use it know its effective.

But to be sure, many of these girls really do feel what they express. They put these guys up on a pedestal and and feel that if they can win the guy over, it must mean that the girl is something special, too. For some girls, it is the ultimate form of affirmation of self-worth and esteem. Alas, it does not last. After the hero worship wears off and the guys become very human, then the shine wears off and its time to go. But as well, there are girls who just want to conquer a star, and not just one, but every one of them that they can get their hands on, or "other" things.

But my point here is that if the girl sets out to "get" you, win you over, with whatever it takes, she is playing with a loaded weapon and ought to be accountable for it in every way. That you are not a child or a feeble old person is not relevant. All people have vulnerabilities and that absolutely has to be recognized by anyone decent, particularly those who follow God. Or, suppose the girl is really taken by you. You are still vulnerable. She bears some responsibility, and likewise, she is vulnerable to those same "drugs" that you are. Both share in this together, one way or the other.

So, if a woman comes at you with everything she has and she happens to have everything as well to hit you with, a poor man could be a sitting duck. And yes, the opposite can happen where a man or "boy" of 14 can take advantage of an adult woman. The Bible understand this quite well. It takes all this into consideration and never faults just one party. Both share in the responsibility and accountability. But in modern law of ill motives, the adult is by default, the only guilty party and crucified with the full and unreasonable force of the law. They are stripped of any dignity or humanity, made into a monster and a demon, and beyond any possible redemption or understanding. I have never seen the likes of it.

Humans are very vulnerable to the opposite sex. And truth told, and it will be here on this site and in this article, as always, young teens have the most beauty to offer the most often, and even have a more appealing innocent attractive personality as well. But should one of them use their advantages, their weapons, really, they can cause great hurt and harm with what they have, because of laws as they are. Yet, no harm can come to them ever, even if they initiated the encounter and used everything they had. Whether it was because they were really taken by the adult, or just wanted to hurt them, make fun of them, or even act for law enforcement to entice and entrap "offenders," they should be accountable for their actions that can lead to taking advantage of another's nature and vulnerabilities.

In fact, all nations in previous times to the Industrial Revolution, always held each party equally responsible. Room was made and allowed for guy and girl to make it right after, recognizing that both fell prey to their nature, a very real nature. The guy might have to marry the woman, the old proverbial shot gun wedding. But throwing the guy in prison and making him out to be some hideous monster beyond all redemption would not have been even dreamed of. Only in a very sick and wickedly inclined society as we have today would we do such things. That is why God will have to judge the world very harshly for their evil.

Making Peace with God and Decency
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Adult men and women are not monsters because they are attracted to youthful men and women, and yes, I am calling young teens, even 13 or 12, even as Rome, Jews and Christianity once did, for in youth is where most beauty is to be found. We all want to have beauty and be beautiful. Who wouldn't? Time to stop persecuting it and start accepting it and making everyone accountable on both sides. Time to recognize the complete evil behind these wicked laws they dare call justice and decency. The real monsters are those who make the laws and enforce them and have the nerve to call them justice and justified. That's just my opinion, of course. But I try not to express my opinions carelessly.

Now lets be honest and clear here. I am not advocating rape or force, nor am I arguing for anything harmful or abusive to a real child under 12, or over that, for that matter. I am simply saying that a person 12 and over ought to know better about many things. They should be absolutely accountable in all things to the law, even as it was and is in the Bible. I know our courts and police have no respect or regard for the Bible, and many probably not even for fairness or decency. They are all either brain washed and sycophants to the system, or have never given it an ounce of thought. Again, that is just my thinking on the matter. They could be moral monuments of integrity. And I might be the 2nd son of God, too ;-) You can believe what ever you want.

But when I bring up young people marrying, it is going to be a fact that some of those marriages will also involve adults or persons over 18. Love does not have any real psychological or physical boundaries. Some like youth, some actually like age, maturity, wisdom, experience, humor, and kindness, wherever they may find it regardless of age or the lack of it. It should be their choice and right.

I know of many teens who would love to break this barrier and often try. But they unintentionally put adults in jeopardy in doing so. But I will argue that it should be the right of a teen, first to be 100% accountable to the law, and 2nd, entitled to a law that allows them the right and responsibility to choose who they want to be friends with, talk with, or have a relationship with. Only the parents would have a right in say something about it all. So yes, the rights of teens are being very much ignored and abused and not to their benefit, though authority claims it is for their benefit, just as low wages are and loss of jobs are. Maybe you believe those, too.

But lets be clear. The law, whether we like it or not, is the law and they enforce it with great brutality and extreme prejudice. Do not disobey the law, whatever you do. Call your congressman and get laws changed and then you will have no problem. Do not take the laws into your own hand. You can also promote this article and/or the ideas in it, so that more will see how inhuman and unfair they are being, not only with love and attraction, but also with low pay, delay of adulthood, rights of parents to teach as they see fit, and other issues as well. It all goes together. When one party gets shafted, it is likely that many parties and interests are getting the shaft as well.

An attack on any goodness, decency, and humanity is an attack on all goodness, decency and humanity. Letting others know its wrong is the first step to changing it and exposing criminal intentions as well. In the meantime, I think that waiting on God is wisest. But if you are a parent, you really might want to think long and hard about what your kids face on TV, from their peers and teachers, and many other places. Are they going to resist giving in to sexual temptation or should you step in and help them in any way you can? And don't think that you can just tell them to abstain. That is very easy to say and nearly impossible for some to do, if they have personality and looks going for them.

It is always a challenge and maybe quite a shock to realize your world is doing everything wrong or nearly so, and almost nothing right. But as I see it, that is the way it is. So give your kids some understanding and help. I have offered much to think about here that you might consider. What ever you do, you will have to answer to God for it. Keep that in mind, OK?

So What About Maturity?
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Is a teen girl too immature, emotionally or psychologically, to marry an adult man? Well, she might be. But is that because she is not capable of being mature in those ways as a teen or simply a matter of her parents not helping her reach that maturity by the time of puberty? I would say without hesitation, it is the shortcoming and fault of the parents, as well as the daughter or son. They should have prepared her and they did not. The teen should be applying themselves to better ways and did not. Was that a nice thing to do to the girl in not preparing her? I don't think so. Age is no guarantee of maturity. But maturity or its lack is not a requirement for marriage. The opportunity to have reached maturity is all that is required. So while not every 18 or 21 year old is mature, the law requires that by that age, they will be held accountable to the law whether they sought to learn it and obey it or not. Anyone who argues that maturity must be proved is ridiculous.

A young woman (a typical teen) has this strong sexual drive pushing her to get married and we haven't prepared her to be able to pursue that. Its not like we didn't know it was coming sooner or later. That is mean and irresponsible on our parts to not get her ready so she could fulfill her destiny in a proper way. Don't you respect your daughter at all? Do you have any compassion for how she might feel? Do you want her to suffer and be deprived? You must if you didn't want to get her prepared. So you either have to be willing to chance that she will be able to get through it OK or you may have to accept that she is going to play around, even though she is immature.

It is clear that most parents have never thought or looked ahead and thought about this whole thing. They just kind of went along without it dawning on them that preparation was required and they needed to get started right away. They wait until it has already arrived and then scurry around in a panic or find themselves beyond any ability to do anything at that point. So this article in intended to put an end to this stupid thoughtless cycle.

But is it right to deny a teen girl the chance to try marriage, even if she is not ready? Really, how prepared is anyone for marriage? Given the statistics for failed marriages, it would appear that few are ready or prepared for marriage, ever, and will have to do a lot of growing, learning, and adapting, only AFTER getting married and not before. Almost everyone does it this way and no other way.

It is a sad fact of life that most people will not prepare but will only learn after trying to attempt something. They have no reason to learn till after the situation has presented itself. That is the folly of both youth and old age. It is the folly of all humanity. We rarely learn except by the hard way. We don't want to see our kids struggle and suffer, but I fear it is not possible to avoid. The Apostle Paul says this about marriage:

(GLT) 1 Corinthians 7:28 But if you also marry, you do not sin. And if the virgin marries, she does not sin. But such will have trouble in the flesh.

That last line is also phrased in two other translations as follows:

(ASV) Yet such shall have tribulation in the flesh.

(RSV) Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles.

Paul warns us that marriage is tough and not without a good deal of problems. That is unavoidable due to sin introduced by Adam. Just the hard reality of life, again. But so is going without sex. The verse I quoted at the beginning of this article has Paul telling us that because of the wide spread problem of loose non-marital sex, we should each be married unless we are one of the few who does have enough self control (or fear ;-) to make it without sex and marriage. But that would be very few. Do you feel lucky?

Now it is not that we can not prepare, but it is the reality that we usually don't. People do not think and prepare for anything ahead of time, even though that is the much better way. We prefer to find out the hard way after the fact. But maybe some will start to try to help their kids prepare after reading this so that their kids will have much less heart ache and struggle than we or others have had.

It is the opinion of some that people who are young and beautiful should also have the right to be married to someone who is also young and beautiful. Well, yes, if they want that, they should be entitled to pursue it and it would not be unreasonable. But not everyone is preoccupied with beauty and youth. There is that very important aspect known as personality, pleasantness, and other such personal qualities that can make a marriage livable or whose lack can doom a marriage.

Further, some women are more concerned with wealth, status, prestige, or other considerations that may be more valued to them. Personally, I find nothing wrong with women who prefer money or some other reason for marrying. One reason is as good as another. The reason is not as important. True, it can be short sighted to marry only for wealth alone and not consider other things, too. But a poor girl might find wealth kind of attractive and compensating, more so than looks might be. I can see nothing wrong with that. Beauty can enable upward mobility and often has.

So though youth and beauty might seem the all important concerns, this is not always the case at all. That is why there are sometimes great differences in age between a couple. It might be the personality and humor attract some. It could be anything but my belief is that no one should judge you by which flavor of ice cream you might like and neither should anyone judge another by the kind of man or woman they like or what age they like them at or whether they even care about age.

I have an interesting account from a Hollywood actress. This little article appeared in the Star, a weekly magazine/paper, dated Dec. 22, 1998, entitled "Nicole Kidman: How I talked myself out of doing drugs." Nicole, at 18, took up living with a man twice her age, 36 years old. To quote her, "He was the one who gave me a great belief in men. I was really lucky to have him." Nicole quotes her mother as saying, in regards to the man's age, "It's not age, it's people."

I believe she was showing good sense in that respect. Young people, like Nicole once was, can be very determined and headstrong (not that she necessarily was). To interfere or object would not accomplish much. As far as Christian parents go, They should make it clear that God does not approve of sex without marriage and that they would not, either. But I do believe they should remain open to a relationship, talking, and the like, and not continually expressing their disapproval. Once is enough to make it known and after that, the son or daughter has to make up their own mind.

Celine Dion, the rather famous singer, fell in love with her manager who is about 25 years older than her. But to her, the age meant nothing. Love does not understand or comprehend age. To love, age means absolutely nothing. Love is truly without prejudice. Good thing something is without prejudice, huh? I could come up with many more examples but these illustrate my point adequately.

So if a young woman should fall for an older man, where is the harm? Some will say they have nothing in common. What makes you so sure? Maybe she likes someone who is playful and funny. Maybe she feels the older man she likes is just that. Maybe she likes father figures, maybe not having had one herself as a child. Maybe she likes his brain. I don't care what she likes about him. It is her business, not mine. Parents might have some legitimate reasons to be concerned. Maybe they see bad signs that the girl is blind to, as love does tend to blind us all. Equally possible is that the parents are being irrational and prejudiced, too.

Some parents will wonder what a full grown man could possibly like in a young woman of teen years, besides looks. What? What are we suggesting? Are you saying that a teen girl has absolutely nothing about her that is any good or worth wanting? Is she so completely void of any good qualities that a man, any man, could not possibly find anything desirable about her other than her body? I think it is completely ridiculous and disrespectful of teens. Of course they can have good qualities. Do they just suddenly over night become useful productive people and are useless before that? Or do they slowly progress as they grow?

Obviously, they progress as they grow and do have something or could have a lot to offer to a man as well as another teen. Do parents really think so little of their daughters? I doubt it. They think their daughters are very valuable and deserve the best . . . but only when they are way past the bloom of youth. That's crazy. A teenage girl has plenty to offer. This is another example of how we slight, devalue, and underestimate what teens can do and what they are worth. And do I need to point out that beauty is the main reason any of us marry, if we are to be honest? We go for looks first, and hope there is some personality after. Often, the relationship never gets far because the beauty has nothing else to go with it.

So what to do when an older man shows interest in your daughter? That is a tough one to sort out. You talk with your girl and try to be calm, rational, and supply good reasons why you might disapprove or recommend caution. If you can not give good reasons, then she has every right to ignore your warnings, seeing them as being irrational. But often persons of different ages can bring a lot of value to each other and to many types of relationships. What child has not gained from a relationship with a good coach? A student from a teacher? An new music fan from an old one?

And for that matter, I have learned plenty from kids. They often force me to remember things I might have forgotten. They give me a fresh outlook and force me to think more carefully about some things. Their energy and enthusiasm are contagious. Let me ask, if kids are so worthless and unrewarding for other adults, why do any parents have kids in the first place? If bringing up kids and sharing what you know with them is a rewarding experience for parents, then why not for other adults, too? How does that work, anyway? We are again being dishonest in saying there are no good reasons for a man finding it desirable to have a relationship with a teen girl.

Further, old people, very old people, often find young children a joy and blessing to have around. They lift older people's spirits and brighten up their lives. They give old people a reason to live. The worst thing we do in our society is stick old people in old age homes where they are exposed to no one except other infirm and dying old people. What a drag that must be! They want to remain in the land of the living where they can be reminded of their own youth and enjoy the younger ones they may love.

The worst thing we ever did in our world was to cease to care for our elderly and dump them off on an institution who often confiscates their property and assets to pay for their keep, leaving their living relatives without a thing. But our society has made it necessary to do it now as it takes 2 working people to support a family. That is another wrong. It should only take one person working. We have many evils to correct but it is only God's kingdom that will likely do it.

Age Prejudice
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We live in an age of incredible age prejudice in the USA and likely most industrialized countries. This is ironic when you consider that in most respects, we strongly condemn other types of prejudice such as race, color of skin, sex type or sex preference, supposedly religion (unless your Christian), or even political persuasion within reason. But when it comes to age, we are extremely prejudiced and discriminating. We routinely discriminate against anyone over 40 in the work place. We forbid pretty much every sort of contact or association between adults and kids except in some very specific contexts, such as teaching or coaching. We certainly would not condone or allow fraternization between ages as narrow as perhaps a 17 year old woman with a 20 year old man. What a difference 3 years makes, huh? We crucify age differences of 5 years or more, other wise.

Part of this is the result of our current educational system. There was a time when children of all ages learned together in a small classroom in one small building or just from their parents before formal education was established in this country around 1860. But then we decided to treat education like manufacturing and mass educate kids. We build very large multi room buildings to house many children from all over the place. This centralization was seen as beneficial. I don't see it myself. I think it was a move to ensure more control over the education process and to make sure all kids got indoctrinated the same way on a mass scale and eventually keep kids from learning adequately to defend themselves properly to ensure proper respect for their rights in our society and government.

It is true that kids of the same age tend to progress at somewhat similar levels in most regards emotionally, but not quite as much intellectually. My opinion is that kids need individual instruction and need to learn and be advanced according to the progress they make individually and not all herded at the same pace. If a student is bright and eager, let them move more quickly. If they are slow, instruct them more carefully and allow them to grow as they will. But we prefer, or someone somewhere prefers, to herd them all and keep them all at the same slow stupid level. I believe the education process has been sabotaged. So does Mr. John Taylor Gatto.

If each went at their own pace, you would see different ages mixed into different subjects. Some gifted kids go to college at 11 or 12 when most are 18 or older. This is quite appropriate and more natural. In the real world and the work place, brilliant young people will often work right along side old veterans. This is as it should be. But we have been conditioned by our school system to think only in terms of the same age. It is wrong and needs to be corrected.

I have benefited so much from relationships from older people. I use to skate with an older guy in his 60's when I was in my early 20's. I played badminton and learned more about it from a gang of old people over 55 when I was 30. I learned the Bible from older men. My teachers were older. Some of my better friends were the older ones as we just seemed to have more in common and more respect for each other. As man of 20, I and several friends a couple years younger used to hang out with a guy of 30. He had the knowledge, experience, and personality that we were really drawn to. He was willing to share it with us. And he was one of us, so to speak and not like other older people of 30. We felt comfortable relating to him and him to us.

But if I liked their friendship, then it surely has to be acknowledged that it is as important for old people to make themselves available to the young as it is for the young to seek out the old. I see no reason why that could not also happen to a young woman of teen age. I have also been influential and beneficial to younger kids, too. It works both ways. It is good, beneficial, and healthy. It is also very important and necessary in order for knowledge, morals, and traditions to be passed on.

I saw an interesting show on elephants on a nature show on TV. When the elephant herds got too big for certain areas, the government of that region of Africa shot off all the adult elephants but preserved the young ones, the kids, so to speak. The young males grew up without the influence of older males and became quite violent and were killing other animals and fighting each other. It was determined by those who manage, study, and care for the elephants that they needed the influence of older male elephants. So some were brought in and they disciplined the young males and kept them in line and gave them a good example as well. The violence ended. Even in the animal kingdom, the adult influences are very important.

Older People Are a Valuable Asset
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It is also important in order to prevent a generation gap. The idea of respecting gray hairs and old age is a common and vital theme in the Bible. So to deny the importance of the young and old having plenty to do with each other, is to reject God and the Bible. In addition, it follows that since we were never intended to get old when man was first created, that eventually, there would be people of all ages and increasing age differences as time went on. Yet they would all look the same whether they were 21, 30, 100, or 900. Let me give you a few samples of God's view of old age and its importance to the young.

1 Kings 12:8 But he forsook the counsel of the elders which they advised him, and consulted with the young men who had grown up with him, who were standing before him.

The "he" referred to here was Solomon's son who inherited the throne just after Solomon has died, King Rehoboam. The people had all come to him upon his becoming king and asked him to ease up on taxes. The elders recommended that he do it but the young men foolishly advised him not to be soft and to promise to be even harder than his father. He did so and so most of the kingdom of Israel rebelled against him and elected another to be king over them.

Psalm 148:
11 kings of the earth and all people, princes and all judges of the earth,
12 young men and virgins too, old men and youths.
13 Let them praise the name of Jehovah; for His name alone is exalted; His glory is above the earth and heavens.

Here in the Psalms, we see that people worship together, not segregated by age, sex, or any other factor. Just as they worship together, so do they live together and learn together. The collective learning of a people can only take place by sharing experiences and knowledge with each other without being hung up on age or sex or status.

Job 12:12 With the aged is wisdom, and understanding in the length of days.

Wisdom is particularly prevalent among the older people who have more experience than the young and can share it with them.

Deuteronomy 6:6 And these words which I am commanding you today shall be on your heart. 7 And you shall teach them to your sons, and shall speak of them as you sit in your house, and as you walk in the way, and as you are lying down, and as you are rising up.

Deuteronomy 11:18 And you shall lay these words up in your hearts, and in your souls, and shall bind them for a sign on your hand. And they shall be for frontlets between your eyes. 19 And you shall teach them to your sons by speaking of them as you sit in your house, and as you go in the way, and as you lie down, and as you rise up.

Sharing our collective wisdom and experience with our kids is important. But it is not just a job that falls to the parents. Even in our society, we have separate teachers in schools, and coaches, in the work place and elsewhere. But we have failed to do it enough so as to pass on morals and values that were and are important. So we have changed, and our morals and values have relaxed. This is partly because we did not do a good job, if any job, in giving a good defense of, and reasons for, why these values were important to keep.

And in previous times, the entire community helped reinforce and maintain the values of the community. But we allowed our sense of community to die and ceased to live together in communities and spread ourselves out, and sought places to live, not based on who was around us but on how nice the property was. I think that was a tragic mistake but maybe not entirely avoidable. Since we no longer depended on the land that kept us where we were and depended on employers that move us around a lot, we now often end up living with people who do not share our values and standards of living. So we are isolated and vulnerable to other influences that help erode what we try to teach our children. What a mess, huh?

Further, some of our values were not good and deserved to be thrown out, such as our overly prudish and unrealistic views of sex. We also have had little to do with kids, allowing them to grow up without our guidance, and they tend to get their guidance from their own peers, like Rehoboam and they fall on their faces like he did, too. Obviously, there are more than a few things we have done wrong, though not because we necessarily understood that we were doing wrong. We just didn't know. But now we do. Let's do better.

But it is not just through formal association with kids that we pass on our knowledge and reinforce our cultural values, but also through friendship with them and caring about them. Why should people listen to other people who are not their friends and, therefore, not people they really feel close to or trust? Trust and respect come through close association and knowledge of each other. It is necessary and essential that older and younger people be friends and share their knowledge and life with each other. They both stand to benefit from that. Of course, this is exactly what governments would like to prevent because they know its good, too. Think about it!

Shall we ignore and avoid God because He is obviously way older than us? Eternally older by as many billions of years as we want to go back into the past to account for. Of course the idea is even beyond ridiculous and insane. What if Jesus were interested in your daughter? Would you reject him because he might be, because of both his pre-heavenly and post-earthly existence, maybe millions of year old? He was millions of years old when he came to earth as a man. Would you tell Jesus to beat it because he is a dirty old man and a pervert? Lets face it, no matter who he would marry, were he a man again, he would be way older than they were.

But those in power and control have convinced us, and not entirely without merit, that people of different ages should have nothing to do with each other and that any older person who has anything to do with younger people could only be a pervert and up to no good. It is not true but it would appear that few older people have any good intentions toward youth or anyone for that matter. It is not a problem with old people as much as it is from anyone. We all are nastier, meaner, more ill-willed than ever before. But this is also the case with the young with each other.

But the danger we do not recognize is that we have made it impossible for proper interactions between young and old, for the most part. I suppose it was inevitable as humanity has degenerated and gotten worse, and it is only God that can finally fix it at this point, but we have effectively, or should I say those who rule over us and control us have effectively, and we let them, completely isolate the young and convinced the young they are better off without anyone older. It was and is as if we had locked them away in a room by themselves where no one can get to them and they can get to no one else to learn, and get wise to things, and get on to things.

A healthy society is one that has a variety of arrangements, including marital arrangements, with young marrying young, old marrying old and every variety of young and old mixtures as well. Consider that Joseph was far older the Mary. Jacob was 91 when Rachel was only a teen and married him. Of course, he probably did not look as old as a 91 year old of today as they lived longer, but I suspect he was still showing some age. Rebecca was 10 when she married Isaac and he was 60. Abraham only had 9 years on his wife. Boaz was considerably older than Ruth, the Moabite, called a young woman at the time. Indeed, among men and women of God, sharp age differences were quite common. God fearing people take note!

Oct. 26, 2016 >  It should be understood that Abraham has sent his servant to get a wife for Isaac, sending the servant to the region where Abraham's relatives lived. This was about 500 miles north of where Abraham was camped, looking at Google Earth maps. No planes, trains, or cars back then. 500 Miles in general, was an obstacle that would prevent most long distance family visits. Once separated by 500 miles, many accepted that they would never see their relatives again once that much distance came about. Abraham wanted a relative for a wife, in the days before marriage to close relations was forbidden by God thru Moses.

Abrham's extended family (Terah's descendants) were all worshipers of Jehovah. That was the most important concern. Any other considerations were seen as minor. Rebeccah, being only 10,  could seem young. It was young. But too many people will see this as unfit and outrageous. But they are assuming that sex was begun as soon as Rebeccah arrived in Abraham's camp. God's servants knew only too well that premature pregnancy could be a disaster. It goes without saying that they would make sure Rebeccah was developed thoroughly to be able to carry and give birth.

Now I am not unware that many cultures act presumptuously, marrying 8 and 9 year olds AND having sex at that time. This was never a Bible practice. But Rebeccah leaving at 10, was with the willingness of her and her parents, who knew all too well who Abraham was and the concerns. So Rebeccah was sent off, along with her nursemaid (Deborah) to comfort her as well. My point here would be not to read too much into this. Who was sought out for marriage limited who was considered, by a substantial margin. The Servant was not going to be able to leave and come back again later, with 500 miles between them. It was now or never.

Circumstances dictate! In India, children are married off by the parents at young ages, in places. But the kids stay with their parents, only till they go thru puberty and then they are quickly put together so that if temptation arises, they will have each other and not just anyone.

Our world today in many nations, particularly those of the "West," has no regard or value for marriage or morality and chastity. But in the Bible, those are essential if one is to be accepted by God the almighty! <<< end of Update

So is God a pervert? Oh, please! Are you sure you are a Christian? Really, we need to rethink the age thing and we need to let young people get married as soon as adolescence and puberty takes place. I note that the practice of some parts of India is to arrange marriages while the kids have yet to enter puberty so that as soon as they go through it they are brought together to live. This is done because the parents see this period of puberty as such a threat and challenge that as they see it, the best way to avoid problems is to be ready and waiting for this moment with marital arrangements in hand so that temptation can be warded off before it ever becomes a problem. I consider this a very wise and enlightened practice. They don't stick their heads in the sand and hope the time never comes. They know it will come and they want to be ready and prepared. That is far better than how we handle it here in the USA where chastity is almost unheard of. If one cares about God and His rules, one will take great care to ward off fornication, listed in Acts 15 as one of the 4 most important concerns of any Christians who fear God. Do you fear God???

Ironically, just to night as I was updating this article, another place, Birgunj , Nepal , does the same thing. Kids marry at around 7, but then do not actually live together till maybe 11 or so. Why act so early? Partly because there is competition among parents to secure a good "catch" for their son or daughter so they do not wait till most have already been hooked up together. So they all scramble early to get the best deal. The kids were fine with the practice. The couple married at 7 were both pleased with each other at the time. It has worked as well as, if not better than, the results we get with marriages. I think it works better. Puberty can be a brutal time of temptation and being able to extinguish the flames of passion as soon as they start makes a lot of sense to me.

But it was noted that arranged marriages are dying out as Western influence discourages it, trying to delay marriage there even as they did in the USA in the mid 1800s onward. Corporate influence is a cancer that spreads everywhere.

Children Need Play From Adults
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For kids, play is dear to their hearts and they especially love when their parents play with them. In a normal healthy parent/child relationship, kids will feel more secure when their parents are with them. This is as it should be. And when parents play with their kids, it creates a special bond and the kids hearts open up more to their parents. The kids instinctively understand that if parents take the time to be playful, then they must really love their kids and enjoy being with them. This gives kids a really warm and positive view of their parents and deepens the bonds of trust and respect. Try it and you'll see. It can be anything simple, riding on your shoulders, throwing a baseball, climbing a tree, coloring with them, whatever. Simple things please them quite well at young ages.

In fact, children learn better from parents than others. They feel more secure with their parents. Bonds need to be reinforced and continually strengthened or they will diminish. Due to the way we have stratified society, it is not often that other adults have much to do with kids anymore. It was more accepted and less ostracized at one time but not now. Warm, friendly, intelligent, playful, caring people will always be attractive to the young. Governments can not compete with such competition. People who serve governments are not nice people and do not attract much attention.

But it is not surprising that the few times adults do seem to come in contact with teens, that relationships are not that uncommon. They are outlawed and despised by governments and parents alike but I am afraid that attraction does not know any boundaries and does not deserve any. But artificial barriers of the law have been put in place and adult teachers, coaches and the like have been vilified, demonized and made into monsters and perverts, which is not just or fair. But if those barriers were not in place, for sure, there would be many more relationships to form, since, truth be told, teens actually like nice adults. Its a fact!

I looked up to older kids and young adults. I have seen many kids who still did so. there is no reason why they should not. People can be likeable at any age. It can turn into romance quite easy.
The danger for social manipulators is that should an adult have a relationship with a teen and begin to share their insights and experience, that the teen will then spread it to all their friends and before you know it, the government's game of isolation so that only they can influence kids is destroyed in quick fashion. So zero tolerance of age different is severely and strictly enforced, but only one way and I'll deal with that shortly.

But I do also notice that kids today are starved for adult attention for they hardly get any from their own parents or anyone else. So they become more vulnerable to adult manipulation and abuse, as well as becoming involved with good adults as well. Of course, any adult relationship is mandated by law as evil and horrendous, but the motives for that have just been revealed above. But if one wants to protect their kids from being overly vulnerable to preying adults, then the parents must give plenty of attention to their own or their own will seek it elsewhere. so give your kids plenty of affection and attention and do things with them.

But it is my opinion that society were be better served if we did not vilify mixed age relationships and did not persecute them. The generation gap might shrink right up and disappear or at least diminish substantially. It would be much healthier for all.

One Way Accountability
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Perhaps one of the most deplorable circumstances is the fact that teens have no accountability for their actions. And they can be quite cruel, playing with the emotions and vulnerabilities of adults and other teens, too. But lets first address the nature of sexual attraction.

Sexual attraction and sexual relations are among the most powerful drug like intoxicating substances in existence. We all have some vulnerability to love, affection, beauty, attraction and the like. Some treat these as if they were a game or a lark. They care nothing for the feeling of others or who they might be hurt. Some teens love to try to get the attention of adults. But they can bring a lot of harm to adults if they succeed and they often do. The adults will go to prison but the kids get nothing. This is truly evil. If the adult can be harmed by the law, then enticement or entrapment should also be equally prosecuted and punished. 2 way accountability is the only moral and decent option. If a teen solicits an adult, the teen should suffer the same as the adult, since they are the ones who initiated it.

But if this were done, parents would soon insist that age differences be no longer treated as a crime. This is what government fears most, so it lets the kids off the hook with no accountability so that the parents will not request the prohibition of age difference to be abolished. Its a sick wicked little game. Exploitation of anyone at any age should be a serious crime. And teens exploiting adults for amusement is really evil as any exploitation is.

I recall a movie that brought this to mind, starring Mathew Broderick and Reese Witherspoon, in "Election" 1999. In it, Reese as Tracy is an aggressive ambitious (and very appealing) student who is enamored of male teachers. Mathew plays a teacher (Jim) who watches his fellow male teacher go down because of falling for her as she kind of leads him on. She does not seem to understand that her attraction to male teachers is causing them great harm. Jim sees this and is out to stop this cunning manipulator who does not see what she is doing to these innocent men and they are innocent and vulnerable to female charm, not entirely their fault, regardless of what corrupt law says. But as hard as Jim tries to stop her winning the school election, it only seems to backfire on him in comical ways. Its a very good comedy with a bit if truth weaved into it.

Tracy had some guilt in this. She was causing great harm in seeking only her own desires. I see this often in the papers and on TV. Only one side is ever blamed and the adult is always fully and solely responsible. I recall Mary Kay Letourneau. The "boy" who was 13 but looked 20, and had that self assurance and charm, decided to seduce her and she was vulnerable. He broke her down and then bragged to all his friends. But she is the one who went to prison and lost her children and they lost her as well. and the law was just fine with that.

Just as kids can kill and be made to account as adults, it should be no different here, either. You can not harm or take advantage of people or exploit their vulnerability without being made to account to the law. Some might say our witch hunt laws are right but I can assure you God will have plenty to say about it and not in a good way, either. So keep in mind that as you judge others, so God will judge you, who think the law is so righteous and holy. We'll see!

But as they say, it takes two to tango. All accountability should be 2 way, both ways and not just one way only. One way law is evidence of corruption and sinister motives. It should concern people but it clearly does not. that is why God must judge it all so harshly for we have sown in evil so we shall reap the same. We get what we deserve!

Not Like It Used To Be
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On mixed age relationships: As generations progress, I have seen that there is less difference between young and old than there used to be. I see many old people now who like music of the 60's and later. That did not use to be the case. Remember when elevator music (muzak) used to be played in all the stores? Notice how it is all somewhat contemporary with 60's, 70's and maybe 80's music now!? Same with other things. The old conservative prudish culture of earlier in this century is nearly gone and a new one has come along that is more similar to younger generations than was previously the case. That has not been noticed or acknowledged as much as it should be.

Many a person will never have a truly great relationship. I see lots of marriage where they just seem to tolerate or put up with each other. And many others result in divorce and many will not have another relationship. If someone has a good relationship from 15 to 50, they have done far better than most will ever do. So even here, I don't see age as being a particularly significant aspect.

The main obstacle would be what they have in common. A young woman may be energetic and active at 20 where as the man at 40 may be slowing down and not want to live it up as much. Then again, maybe that is not important to the woman. And people can vary quite a bit in activity level or many other things, even when they are the same age. But there is no doubt that there is more chance for less in common in older men with younger women when the difference is more than 10 years. And the same could be said for a young man and an older woman as well.

I also see another generation gap forming. Baby Boomers had a complete break with the previous generations before them. Those who liked music from the 60s to maybe early 90s have experienced a divide as music, most notably hip hop and the like, gets more angry as life becomes more bitter. So I do not think that age gaps will be easily breached as they might have been in the 80s, perhaps. But it would have and could have been different but the mold has been cast and only God will heal people and get rid of this silly and harmful division of ages.

But I say that mixed ages is no better or worse than same ages or any other combo. Each has its benefits and pitfalls. The difference with age differences is that the law and society uses far more persecution and prejudice that it does with other types. This may be the real reason that ages difference couples might suffer more.

Know Yourself Well
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It goes without saying that anyone contemplating marriage with anyone else of any age should be sure they know themselves well so as to be able to accurately assess what they are really looking for and what would be best for them and look for that. It is easy to fool one's self when one is in love. But I believe that kids should be taught to look at themselves and ask deep soul searching questions so that by their teen years they will have a good idea of who they are, what they want, and where they are going. This is not a typical thing to teach at a young age but should be.

If we know ourselves well, then we can know better how easy or difficult it will be to live with another person and endure their habits and lifestyle. And certainly, taking time to get to know the other person is important, too. Further, for those who may be inclined to believe that they might end up living on earth forever, that also means being married forever. And if you happen to survive, along with your spouse, after Judgment Day, Armageddon, then you will be stuck with each other forever. That is a long time.

But on the brighter side, I do believe that if everyone learned to be more like Christ, then it would hardly matter who you live with. It would not be that difficult. But let's face it, not many teen girls will want to marry old men of 30 or more, anyway. Nor will most teen boys want to marry a 30 year old woman. But as both sexes gt along in years, neither one will be all that young, even if there are 10 or more years between them. There is just not much to find fault with when there is only about 10 years difference. That isn't really much at all, in culture, preferences, energy, health, or anything else.

For those who think 10 years matters, consider this. How significant is the difference between age 40 and age 50. You can be president whether 35 or 60. We who are that age know there is little or no difference. Politicians in congress vary in ages, usually from 35 or 40 into their 60's and yet all are considered to be somewhat equal in respect and ability. And I don't think the gap is that big between 15 and 25. Yes, 10 to 20 is a bit more significant. But by 15, the significance and difference has diminished drastically.

But I also sadly note that personal growth is at an all time low and so people are finding it ever more difficult to relate to each other. Society is breaking down on a massive scale. We have lost all sense of values and morals and direction. Just as the Bible had foretold, the days would be particularly challenging and difficult. The prophecies have certainly proved to be accurate and will only get more accurate soon. Its a sign of the times!

A Few More Things To Consider
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It is true that most teen girls go for teen boys. But there are quite a few teen girls who also show an attraction and interest in men in their 20's, too. But I believe teen girls often find men in their 20's as desirable, even preferable to boys their own age. So why do most go for guys their own age? One reason is because we herd and congregate them together in an un-natural setting of school (as I pointed out earlier) where they have no one except their own age to associate with or learn with. Rather than being taught by parents all the primary skills of knowledge and life, we leave it to mass education and their peers.

So we herd them all together, where, of course, they will mix and hook up. There is no other circumstance in life other than the military, where most people will be the exact same age as us. In natural life, exposure to various ages is the norm and will result in a more balanced association of a variety of ages which will give us a more well rounded view of things, just as a healthy diet is a varied and balanced one.

And any time you put a bunch of males and females together, regardless of race, religion, or age, there are bound to be lots of relationships form. That is unavoidable and is just nature taking its natural course. So if teens are all that is available to each other, that is all that will take place unless there are other avenues as well.

If allowed to pursue what they wanted without any stigma or pressure, I am willing to bet the teen girls would be with the young men instead of boys their own age. Young men seem have the maturity and development that teen girls seem to prefer. I would say it is an instinct God gave to young women for their own protection and best interests. The men usually have a better developed sense of humor, or whatever, that makes them appealing. They are not as awkward and socially clumsy as boys can be.

It is true that many of the men who typically cavort with teen girls today seem to only want to use them. But that can easily and rightly be said to be the case with any woman of any age. Men today do not like commitment and love to play the field. But there could be a number of men who might like to treat a teen girl right but . . . they are not allowed to be anywhere near them and so the nice guys stay away, not because they want to but because they fear the unjust law that would punish them. So only the bums ignore the law so we do not get to see a balanced representation of the kinds of guys that would treat a girl right.

The Failure Rate
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I know I did cover this some earlier. It is true that many marriages fail. The rate is about 50% for the average marriage and a little higher for young marriages. The success rate is not good. Neither is the growing incidence of alcohol abuse, drug abuse, and lack of good sensible behavior. They are all related symptoms. We don't train our kids well, if hardly at all. Parents don't like hearing that, though. They don't want to be responsible, anymore than the kids want to be. There is the heart of the problem for us all. But young marriages primarily fail, not because of immaturity, but because the world makes it nearly impossible for the young to get good jobs and pay. If they struggle to earn a living, then the marriage will suffer as well. When people are unhappy, they tend to take it out on who ever is closest to them. For married couples, it is each other.

I think life is very disappointing to most people, as they are not prepared to expect the worst or anywhere near that. But reality is, that we will not be prepared for the shock and disappointment. Parents should have warned us and prepared us but they won't. When disillusion happens, people blame the failure on their partners rather than the system.

In addition, we have given them a world that does not offer a lot of hope and opportunity, which can discourage them and lead them to want to escape reality through drugs, sex, or whatever. If we want to stop the behavior, then give them a better world of greater hope and opportunity and they won't want to escape into illusion.

Regardless of how old couples are, most marriages will encounter serious challenges, due to the many character flaws we all have. Marriages will fail at 15; they will fail at 30 or 35. As I said earlier, we don't begin to learn until we begin to do. If we wait till 30 to do, we will learn, usually by failure or through some tough knocks. Delaying the marrying age does not work but in a few rare cases and slightly better results than the youngest marriages. Nor does it work anymore than delaying the age for getting a license or drinking has worked (or not worked actually).

But if they marry young and fail, there is the chance to try again with plenty of youth and appeal left to allow us a 2nd chance. But if we fail at 35, we may not get a 2nd chance. And waiting till 35 usually involves fornication in the form of shacking up or living together before hand. Its easier to marry off a young appealing woman of 20 with a child or 2 than to do so with a woman of 35 or 40.

The circumstances of the world that greet new couples are deplorable and so is the idea of living with lots of other people, even if they are relatives or in-laws. But so is fornication and losing out on everlasting life. But there are more issues beyond that, from a legal and civil liberties aspect. Let me show you.

Civil Liberties at Stake
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Here is the real heart of the dilemma. If parents do a lousy job and end up with a grown son or daughter who is totally unprepared for life, do we simply revoke all the young person's privileges, rights, and liberties under the law and constitution, because they are unprepared? Or until such time as they can demonstrate that ability? Does that really make sense? Even more important, do we have the right to deprive people of God given rights to the basics of life such as drinking, sex, and the like? And age makes no difference. If they are not ready at 17, I doubt that 18 or 19 will make all that much difference. And the problem will likely be there even at 30 or 40. So then it becomes an issue of when and how much restraint do we enforce and for how long.

Further, if a person is poor, shall we revoke their rights? Force them to earn enough before they can have all their rights and liberties? What are you suggesting? I think it is appalling to even joke about it. Whether because of immaturity or because of poverty, it gives us no right to deny a person some basic human rights and dignities. The poor and the stupid have every bit as much right as any of us to marry or whatever. So I do not see those as good reasons to deny young teens, either. What is good for the goose IS good for the gander. No doubt about that in my mind. We treat teens as 2nd class citizens. No wonder they resent us.

Do we prohibit them till 15, 18, 21? Do we go even further as we all become more irresponsible, careless, even reckless? Shall we raise the age to 25 or 30? Is that what you all want? Or do we require a test and license to get married or to drink or whatever? Or do we just make people more accountable, regardless of age?!

Of course, I would recommend that while using schools to teach these things is undesirable because it is the parent's right and duty to do so, I do think the schools doing it is better than not doing it at all which is what we currently have because of poor and negligent parenting. But I doubt the government/school wants the kids to be well brought up and prepared. Young adults and teens are much easier to manipulate and control when they know little or nothing. So I do not think it likely they will encourage schools to prepare kids for life and its challenges.

I doubt that big business would want us to be more intelligent about how we act and spend. They certainly don't want us asking for enough pay to support a family decently on one income regardless of the type of work. So don't look for the leaders to help you. They are the ones that like people knowing less and less and turning responsibility for themselves over to the government. So I guess that ignorance is not really bliss after all, is it? It makes us all more susceptible to abuse by the rulers of our world.

As it stands today in many cases, we are told that ignorance of the law is no excuse, IF we are over 18 or 21. But if we are under 18, then excuses, however pathetic, are perfectly OK. It is absurd. I personally believe that is why we are all somewhat irresponsible. Because we once knew a time when we could be like that and we liked it. So now we sue and blame a company for not warning us when we really should have known better but we accept any poor excuse in court because lawyers profit from our unwillingness to be responsible for our own actions and blaming others, instead.

Good for the Goose, but NOT the Gander! Is that right? Better known as Relativism, a dirty word if ever there was one. For Example: If a teen girl should go out of her way to entice and seduce a man she really wants, as I spoke of earlier, we do not make her accountable in the least. She walks away without any guilt or punishment. This is so wrong. She contributed to the problem. She is an accomplice, and accessory to the fact. A teen girl can have a lot of power and influence over a man. That should be acknowledged in our laws and she should bear some of the burden. But she is not held accountable at all so she can continue to get men in trouble and ruin their lives and reputations without any consequence to herself. So she is apt to continue in such reckless and very cruel behavior. Then we have the nerve to wonder why we are a lawsuit happy society and country, where morals and virtue are breaking down.

We make the man the only responsible party and make him carry all the guilt and blame for us not teaching our daughters better sense or making them live with the decision they made to have sex. Even grown women sometimes get involved with a man and later regret it. But they have little recourse other than chalk it up to experience. But if the woman is under 18, she can make the guy pay dearly for maybe just using her instead of her realizing she made it too easy for him to do so and needs to be more intelligent about her actions and more responsible for her actions.

And why do we not make the girl responsible as well? Lawmakers and law enforcement know better. For what parent wants their young daughter of maybe 13-17 going to jail for having sex? The law would not be around very long. Were the only choice be to see the daughter punished equally or let both go, the parents would let both go free and the government knows this. So they only blame the man cause they know the parents will actually like placing the blame on someone or anyone other than their daughter. And with a good strong penalty upon the man, the parents hope it will keep him away from their daughter who they have not been able to influence all that much. They can't control her so hold the guy at ransom. So the government accommodates this as an acceptable compromise, even though there is not a shred of decency or morality to it. When was it ever about morality or decency? Not when government is involved!

And again, there is the danger that our rights could be stripped from us and we could end up having to get permission from the government to marry, drink, or whatever. I don't believe the government has the right to assume that much control over our lives. If I want to do something stupid, that is my right as long as I don't endanger others. Or if I failed to obtain all the knowledge I needed for life, that is my problem. I don't believe it should affect my rights. But it has happened in many areas already. It is a dangerous precedent to allow the government to claim that it knows better what is in our interests than we do.

Where Is the Line Drawn?
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For example, I have to wear seat belts. Others are not in danger but I have to wear them, anyway. They may say that I could be a burden to the healthcare system if I am injured for not wearing them. But I seriously doubt the healthcare system minds. They enjoy having the business. They are overcharging as it is. If we rob them of business, they will get worse with price increases in what little business they get. But if I am willing to pay and they are being paid/compensated, it should be my business. If they can go so far as to worry about how I impact the medical industry, what else will they do? Shall they next complain that I use too much of certain resources? Do I drive my car too much? Do I take too many chances or risks? Am I building my house too big and using up too many trees for the wood?

Shall they start telling me what I can eat so that I am healthy and don't burden the doctors as if the doctors minded? Shall I be fined for eating poorly or perhaps have them ban certain foods? Shall they then tell me how long I should wait to fix the roof on my house so that I won't have to replace the whole roof later? Shall I receive a fine or imprisonment for burdening or wasting our collective resources? Or shall they fix the roof for me against my will and force me to pay them for it? Yes, it could all get that ridiculous. Lets stop it now before its too late.

If we cross that line of free will and free choice, we could all be in trouble and lose every right we have. Hmmmm. Could that be the plan all along? We may all have to get permission from the government to eat beans, fart, and pollute the atmosphere or cause global warming, much less have sex or drink. The precedent is a very precarious and dangerous one. In addition, it violates everything in the Bible.

If we don't learn to accept responsibility for our own choices and continue to insist on blaming others and making only them accountable, then the government is apt to be happy to accept that responsibility and take complete control of us since they are now responsible for us instead of, we, ourselves. And they are using the rebelliousness of teens against us right now. If our teens vandalize or cause other damage, we are held solely and completely liable, even though we are not allowed to discipline our kids effectively anymore. If they are caught smoking, it is the parents who now have to pay a fine that the kid gets for being ticketed.

The government has decided to make us accountable for every little thing our teens do. But as we all know, teens are very difficult to control. Could the day come or is it already here, when we could end up in unbelievable debt due to the actions of our teen kids. What if we should now be charged for their keep in reform school or prison? We already are financially responsible for child support if we should be deemed bad parents and have our kids taken away. And they charge some pretty hefty prices for that support, too.

So this is no joke, folks. It is already happening. It is for your own benefit that the law recognizes your teen kids as individually and independently accountable to the law. If not, you may end up paying dearly, even going bankrupt. But that will also mean you may lose control over their sexual behavior as well. You have already lost that now, anyway, so there is nothing left to lose except a good deal of liability. Schools can give out condoms, medical advice and treatment to your kids, all without your consent. Wake up and smell the coffee!

The trick here is to reach their hearts early and teach as much as you can as fast as you can so that when they become somewhat independent in will and desire, they will discipline themselves and do what they think right. But that may include marrying at younger ages and to older men or women and why not! They are human beings, too.

If we choose not to teach our kids and prepare them early, it is we who are to blame. We must have not liked our kids and you can't legislate love or caring. You can forbid active abuse but neglect in subtle forms is hard to prove or even detect. Besides, most of us could easily be guilty of neglect to some degree, even if it is not in our control that we are forced to neglect due to working too many hours or whatever. To me, if we are old enough to know better and you can't tell me a 15 year old does not know better, then she should be accountable for her actions and choices, good or bad. A guy should not be solely punished for her choices. She should be free to consent to association, consorting, and consenting to sex and marriage, at least with parental consent.

As it is right now, parents do not have that right in all states and could be prosecuted and lose their daughter if they allowed her to willing have sex with an adult. Many states require that the state has to approve of any marriage under 18 and can refuse a parent's permission to let their daughter marry an adult. We live in dangerous times as governmental control grows in leaps and bounds. If she is intelligent, well brought up, moral, and Christian, then she will resist sex until marriage. If she is not, she still won't be stopped and it would be wrong to make the guy out to be the only monster.

I have been addressing primarily teen girls but everything I have written would apply to teen boys and adult women, too. But I think the real hysteria and stigma rests primarily with the idea of teen girls having sex, getting married and especially the idea of marrying someone older than her by at least 5 to 10 years. Parents react with completely irrational outrage and naturally, the daughter does not want to be the recipient and so bows out as the law allows and lets the parents direct all their anger on the guy.

We need to rid ourselves of escape goats and stop demonizing normal manly desires. It is not all the fault of the older person. Each shares the accountability and responsibility. And even of the law might severely punish a man, Christians, who respect and honor God's law, would not do so, for fear of angering God.

Youthful Looks Endear
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So why do parents and society in general see young teen girls having sex as something so horrible and detestable. Again, we can thank the Victorian age quite a bit for that, as well as propaganda from non-profit organizations and newspapers printing their crap. Call them progressive supposed do-gooders. But lets look at this deeper, anyway. Its important. You might remember that I said I would address why young people tend to mature sexually before they are fully grown otherwise. Well now is the time to address it.

We know that babies tend to elicit the very strongest emotions from us. They are very delicate, vulnerable, helpless, innocent looking, and very non-threatening. They really pull on our heart strings and feelings and evoke the most protective reactions we are most likely capable of. That is why abortion is such a loaded subject and controversial in nature.

But as I point out in my abortion article, calm heads need to prevail for very good reasons. Emotions cloud our judgment and distort our good sense of reasoning. And who had better reason to get irrational and over react than Abraham, when God asked him to sacrifice Isaac after God made promises about Isaac. Abraham did not react but accepted the will of God without question or reaction. So we need to leave the emotions at the door here. I have said this at the beginning but thought that it needed repeating.

So we know we are vulnerable to the youthful innocent appearance of a baby. And even a small child, with their tiny little voices and small delicate limbs really bring out our love and tenderness or at least should. These features were made into a very powerful influence by God, for sure. But now what about teens? I see a lot of things in teen girls that are related to kids and babies.

I think teen girls, while very sexually appealing after puberty, usually retain a little bit of that almost child like look in their faces. And they still have a relative amount of innocence about them. To them the world is brand new, exciting, and full of promise. They are more enthusiastic about life and in general, and are half way between the worlds of adulthood and childhood, as far as spirit goes. They also can have quite an effect on parents, obviously. But while they still have some remnants of their former child age, they have changed remarkably in personality and desire, just the same.

But in addition, it should be understood that aging wastes no time, even with youthful teens. Many teens look very good just before puberty, but after puberty often within 3 years of its completion, they lose a lot of their more beautiful and healthy aspects. Many put on dramatic weight gains. The skin becomes quite blemished or tarnished with quite a few. Many things happen to diminish looks. And it is a realistic fact of life that all humans are quite focused on looks. It is instinctive. Even babies are observed to look at more beautiful faces significantly longer than less attractive faces. It is a part of our nature. I strongly urge you to see Desmond Morris' Babywatching, a TV documentary of useful value. He points out much about a baby's instinct and abilities.

It has also been found that beauty affects the same regions of a man's mind as do food and cocaine, even as I pointed out earlier. A woman's image is pure instinct to a man and, not to mention, pure intoxication as well. It is like a drug to him. It is not something that he can erase from his mind or prevent in his mind. It is wired into his system. To find fault with a man because he instinctively finds a young woman of 15 attractive is wicked. We may require him to avoid her but to require him to not even find her attractive is ridiculous and hardly scientific or reasonable. We might as well find fault with a lion for killing prey to eat or mating. How dare they!

And when it comes to attracting men, looks are the first signal to draw a man's interest. They won't hold or keep a man unless there are other things as well (usually but not always, as some men are shallow, too) but they will often be what first motivates him to check a female out. If he gets to know a woman of lesser looks for a while, he may end up liking her enough to marry. But for the most part, looks will play a big part in initial interest. If a woman has any substance along with the looks, then she has a good chance of retaining the man's interest.

So it would be to a woman's best interest to market herself to the guys when she is at her peak of beauty. I don't think there is any question that her peak is just before, during, and after puberty is completed, when she has the least amount of body fat and is at her closest to youthful perfection (while being fully developed in her secondary sexual characteristics) that we would all be, had Adam not sinned. She is at the point where she is apt to have the strongest effect on a young man's, or any man's heart.

How smart would it be to bring some fruit to market if it was green and not mature. It would not be appealing to most. At the same time, it would be unwise to wait till it is past being ripe and begins to brown, wilt, rot, and attract flies. There is a brief window of opportunity in the selection of fruit and I hate to say it, but that goes for men and women, too. A car is worth more when it is closer to being new than when it is older and more broken down. I don't mean to sound crass and make it all seem so cold and unfeeling, but as I said, looks are a fact of life. And they will never be better than they are just after puberty. A girl has a much better chance of getting a more desirable man when she looks better.

Yes, she may still be quite a nice person but what if there is also a young attractive woman who is also nice? The younger one will likely win every time when all other things are nearly equal. That is just the way it is. So a woman has the most to offer or bargain with when she is first matured sexually. There is just no doubt about it. So let her put herself on the market and get the best deal she can. Why would you want to deprive her and force her to have to settle for much less because she waited until she had a lot less to offer? That would be quite cruel as I see it. We say we believe in free market enterprise. And really, we all put ourselves on the market and in the market to attract a mate. We should have a right to market ourselves at our peak and not be forced to wait until what we have to market has gone sour.

And I want to emphasize this! It is not uncommon for many females to lose their best beauty, right after puberty. You don't have a lot of time to take advantage of what you have at upon the completion of puberty. Attraction will begin even before puberty and that is not bad. When girl reaches 10 or 11, it is pretty obvious by that time what she is going to look like, at least for a couple more years or so. Her changes, aside from secondary sexual characteristics, will be somewhat minimal. So in anticipation of this, many relationships begin even before the ripening, knowing it is soon to take place. Then as soon as it does, then marriage can take place, knowing that looks might not last that long, after. This has been going on like this since time began.

I previously mentioned India and Nepal. They recognize the may reasons for having marriage arranged and ready so that when the time arrives, they can quickly put the couple together so that they need no endure unbearable urges or temptation. If you wait till puberty has already arrived, you may wait months or ever years, apart from job and earning considerations (that only make it worse); in order to find a compatible mate. This is the wrong approach by any measure. With so many conditions against finding a good mate, parents are in a good position to begin the process very early, while the child is very young. It could take some time. But once a mate has been obtained or secured, then you are ready for the crisis of puberty with a mate that can quickly step in and relieve the situation.

This will seem completely foreign and repulsive to Americans but to me, it is very logical and again, has been a very common practice throughout man's history. It is actually our way in more recent times that is new and a break from the old established ways. Of course, belonging to a community or group helps make marriage arrangements more likely. But in our very individualistic and isolated society where everything moves every 3 to 5 years, finding a stable situation that can be impossible. I didn't say it would be easy. My real and main point here is that you are really going to have to go far out of your way in some way to insure that your kids can get married as soon as possible, far sooner than we currently do. The sooner, the better. The current way of doing things is a complete disaster and absolutely fails most of the time.

I believe that it is natural for a young teen woman to be attracted to young men in their 20's and even early 30s as I have said before. I think there is enough of that evident even now to dispel any thoughts, otherwise, if a person wants to be honest. I saw it a lot when I was in my 20's. But I also think it natural for a man, a mature man in his 20's, to be moved and touched by this somewhat innocent (not jaded or disillusioned) and delicate yet very sexually developed woman of say, 15. And a 15 year old can be very persuasive and alluring. Don't underestimate her by any means.

A Brief Window of Time
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I think it was something God intended to help the young woman get a strong hold on a man's heart and keep it. She has a charm that can really sweep him off his feet. She can bring out his most tender and gentle feelings and treatment. My mother tells me that she still sees my brother and I as the little babies that we were in the beginning. She can't forget those images of us. Its burned permanently into her mind. I think it is somewhat that way with a young teen woman. She can leave a man with a deep lasting impression with her beauty and youthful innocence.

She gets to the guy when she is fully developed but still has some almost child like looks in other ways, particularly in the face, and enables her to get a sold grip on his emotions and loyalty. She will lose all her child like looks eventually, often within about 2 years after puberty and will look fully grown up with less beauty in many cases. She will not need to continue to look half child like in the face or be quite as slender as they often are, just after puberty. They will often put on an excessive amount of body fat and develop more facial blemishes other skin degradations about a year or so after puberty. Sell it while it is hot because it might cool off real soon. Don't take the chance that it will last for 10 or 15 years. It might do that for some but not many. Do you feel lucky?

The brief period of time when the body is fully developed, yet not with a lot of body fat present and yet the gentle looks still remain, will be the period of time given to allow her to really impress the deep regions of a man's mind so that he will remain loyal to her, even if she should become overly heavy or lose the prettiness she had just after puberty. It is a protection for her just as it is for a baby to make a solid imprint in the mind of its mother, forever. It is a brief window of opportunity which does not present itself again after it passes. You have to seize it when it presents itself.

Let's talk about innocence just for a minute. What is it? Well, to some degree, it is the great expectation of life, and seeing the future so optimistically. It is also the fact that they are apt to be more trusting and less aware of the bad in people. This is beautiful that they are so trusting and innocent. But it is also deadly and dangerous. They actually need to be quickly taught that the world is a place to be very cautious and discerning about. There will still be some innocence in that even though you know it is bad, there is nothing quite like experiencing it first hand. Knowing and actually experiencing something are 2 very different things. But at least she is prepared and it will not be nearly as shocking when she sees first hand the ugly side of life.

But even with adequate preparation, people do not fully lose their trust or confidence in the world until they have been betrayed a few times. A young teen aged girl will likely have a lot of that trust and freedom from betrayal. This can be very handy in cementing a relationship. It will serve both mates well, especially if both have it. As well, if they both have parents behind them, backing and supporting them enthusiastically, it will also help them overcome many obstacles as they won't feel so alone and outnumbered. The initial optimism and trust an important part of the newness and excitement she feels when she falls in love for the first time. It is beautiful and it is nothing bad. But the newness must wear off, but if the man is a good man, she will remain happy and cheerful so that much of that beauty of personality will remain and that is a large part of that so called innocence.

Life tends to kick the crap out of us all and that can dampen the enthusiasm and joy in any of us. But if we keep and maintain the proper outlook, we can retain a large measure of joy in life, regardless of how poor we are or how terrible the world is. So the loss of innocence is only relative. Further, when innocence is lost, it is we who grieve more than the girl. For we have realized that we live in a nasty world where that precious innocence can not last in a world of evil and nastiness. In a beautiful, kind, and trusting world, it would truly last forever but due to Adam's choice, we have the world we do and must live with it. That trusting innocence must be replaced with caution and there is nothing we can do about that. But yes, it is always sad to see it die. Now back to the parents.

Parents still see their little girl. They don't recognize the teen before them or appreciate that she wants to find a mate and marry now. She has truly changed and they are not ready or willing to accept that. They figured this would not happen till 25 or so, I suspect. That is way too long. But she no longer looks like a little girl physically, except maybe in the face, and certainly does not feel or behave quite like that little girl anymore. She is a woman now, in her desires and thinking. She has acquired a sexual persona and identity. Still young and impressionable, but a woman, none the less, the way God intended. They cling to what she was and do not wish to see what she is now. And whether prepared or not, the time has arrived and must now be dealt with. As they say, Deal with it!

Even more scary is to suddenly be confronted with a man actually noticing her and maybe even taking an interest in her. This can cause outright hysteria in parents who have not prepared themselves or their daughter for this day and time. So they become their daughter's enemy, and become almost irrational in their reactions and rules. Everything changes for both sides. This is what the daughter and anyone she might develop an interest in, has to deal with. Not pretty, is it?!

But their reaction is wrong and needs corrected. But in addition, the daughter needs to pay careful attention and remember how this all feels. She needs to understand it all and make sense of it all so that she can avoid the same mistake of not teaching and not preparing for the same situation long in advance of the day when her own daughter will arrive at maturity. Daughters continue to make the same mistakes as their mothers did and never seem to learn or improve. So I write to enlighten the daughters and future fathers as well.

Child Raising Easier in Youth
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Young mothers have far more energy, health, and as a result, patience. As well, they have (should have) parents and a community to draw on for knowledge, help, reassurance, and whatever. As well, being younger, their genetics and epi-genetics are far better in quality, which means their kids will be younger, genetically, when born. Those born late in a woman's life will inherit DNA that is more broken down than it would have been if conceived earlier in life. That is something to consider. If you start early, you can have a bigger family if that was desired.

Kids need playful parents and are more apt to get it if the parents are young when they marry and breed. Starting young will greatly increased the odds that the parents will be around longer to back up and reinforce their kids and have as much time with them as possible. Kids late in life will only have a short time with their parents. If you hope for grandkids, and maybe even great grandkids, then you need to start early to improve those odds.

I believe there are many advantages to beginning young to have kids. As well, if the married young couple starts out living at home with one of the couple's parents, then there is that extra measure of guidance continually available and it allows grandparents a chance to bond closer to the grandkids and allows a coupe a break once in a while to go off to their room and enjoy each other or go out. There are many advantages to the old patriarch style of life, where young couples begin at home or right next door to them.

It was not by accident that all the old Bible patriarchs lived this way. If you really think about it, there is much to be gained with God's way rather than the silly ridiculous way the governments have set things up, to the harm of all parties. Young couples will have accumulated less pain and hurt in their lives and so can better love and nurture their kids in their youth.

Putting Off Childbirth
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This is a news article that I found interesting, though it did not go far enough, as I have done. I'll comment on it after.

Putting off childbirth defies nature, claim doctors
Scotsman ^ | 9/16/05 | Louise Gray        Posted on Friday, September 16, 2005 8:14:37 PM by Crackingham

Women should have a family first - before they are 35 - and leave their career until later, a group of leading doctors said yesterday. The obstetricians and gynaecologists said the increasing number of women delaying having children were defying nature and risking heartbreak. Writing in the British Medical Journal, they recommended that if women wanted families and a career, they should have children earlier, and called for more support for younger mothers. Women's groups voiced caution over putting a deadline on childbirth but agreed on the need for more support.

Susan Bewley, consultant obstetrician at St Thomas' Hospital in London, said the doctors were motivated by the number of older women they saw experiencing problems in childbirth. She said: "It is us in the clinic who see the heartbreak, and we cannot help these people when they are running out of time. That is what motivated me to write [the report] and ask the authorities what can be done to help women to do it at a time that suits them."

In Scotland the most common age for giving birth is now 30 to 34. There has also been a steady rise in the proportion of mothers aged 35-plus, from 6 per cent in 1976 to 18.8 per cent last year.

But Dr Bewley said the optimum age to have a child remained between the ages of 20 and 35. She said: "Each woman finds her own solution but we cannot kid ourselves having children at 35 is easy. It is not. It goes wrong for lots of people."

The strongly worded editorial, co-authored by Melanie Davies, a consultant obstetrician from University College hospital, and Peter Braude, head of the department of women's health at St Thomas', pointed out age-related fertility problems increased after the age of 35, and dramatically so after 40.

The editorial claimed employers and health planners were to blame for encouraging women to delay motherhood to focus on careers and financial stability. It called for government and companies to make it easier for women to choose to have children at a younger age, and said: "Free choices cannot be made with partial knowledge, economic disadvantage for mothers, and unsupportive workplaces.

"Doctors and healthcare planners need to grasp this threat to public health and support women to achieve biologically optimal childbearing."

The experts listed a number of complications linked to later motherhood, including pre-eclampsia and increased risk of miscarriage and ectopic pregnancies.

They also said that older fathers had decreased fertility, while children of older men had an increased risk of schizophrenia and several genetic disorders.

They wrote: "Women want to 'have it all' but biology is unchanged, deferring defies nature and risks heartbreak. If women want room for manoeuvre they are unwise to wait till their thirties."

Dr Bewley added: "You cannot suddenly emerge at 45 and say, 'Now I want children'. I appreciate we want it all and some will get it. But there is a window for reproduction where there isn't for work."

End of Article with posted comments to follow<<<

It is recognized that women are delaying pregnancy far too long. But  . . . to suggest even late 20s, is being a bit absurd. What I see are many more ailments and defects in the young. This has been ascribed to a poisoned toxic environment, bad diet, vaccines, and other factors. But perhaps one ignored and as important as any of those others, is the seriously degraded epigenetics of the parents as they age. What they pass on is in a continual state of degradation, beginning at their conception and birth. The longer you wait, the worse the quality of the genes you pass on. It is a fact. If you want your kids to live long and minimize health problems, You need to start breeding as soon as possible. All females are fully grown by 19, with perhaps just a few very rare exceptions. But some (not a few) are fully developed by 15. A few even earlier. So really, if we were behaving in "natural ways" where instinct had more say, we would be starting families when girls are fully ready to breed, which is in the teen years in practically all cases.

For Christians, consider that all things done in our world today, are done to benefit the devil's plan and you have played right into his hands. Your offspring are behind the 8 ball from the start cause you waited to 30 or more. Now for some comments from the article above, posted on the newspaper's website:


To: nopardons

No you were an early bloomer it happens. I'm talking about the averages, by 15 we're physically ready, we should be mentally ready by then.

I don't pine away for anybody, happily married for 13 years, don't need to pine.

Looking at the body tells you EVERYTHING about what SHOULD be the emotional state of the person IF they had been raised by a society that had the right goals.

Funny you calling me immature since you started off insulting me from your very first post on this thread. That's classic 14 year old behavior.

Actually I was in the state gifted and talented program starting in 4th grade and graduated high school with 12 college credits already to my name (AP classes). Funny how obsessed you are with devaluing me as a person, just deal with the fact, poisoning the well is nothing more than a logical fallacy, grossly immature, highly transparent, and in this case is failing miserably.

Some children are coddled until they're 30 because we keep calling them children for ever. Call them adults when we want them to be adults and make them act like adults. One of the big things we miss when dealing with that transition is nothing can really and truly make a person ready for adulthood like adulthood. You can't learn responsibility without having something to be responsible for. You can't pay bills until you have bills to pay. You can't raise kids until you have kids to raise. We've gotten obsessed with this concept of "ready", everybody wants their kids to be "ready" before they leave but the reality is you can't be "ready" until you leave. But in this constant quest for "ready" we keep moving the expected line of adulthood further and further back, which accomplishes nothing positive for anybody.

I really wish you'd stop insulting and belittling me, don't sigh, act like an adult and discuss this like an adult. Adults don't need to insult people they disagree with, adults can deal with facts.

The 60s is the era when college became much more wide open and a much wider subsection of American society started going. This is a simple historical reality, to quote you "look it up". This broadening of the percentage of our youth seeking additional schooling (for a large variety of social, economic, and political reasons) caused the immature years to expand. Check out Woodstock, lots of "kids" who were an age that just 10 or 15 years ago would have been considered adult without even the sense to get in out of the rain or to bring as many sets of clothes as days they planned to be out. Expanded immaturity captured on film forever with an occasionally pretty good soundtrack.

No I am pointing out painfully obvious facts. And the fact that with every single post you are resorting to more and more base ad hominems proves that even you know the facts are on my side. If you had confidence in the facts you'd stick to them, your need to insult shows you have no confidence in the facts, thus showing you know the facts prove me right. Be an adult, go one entire post without insulting me, I bet you can if you try really really hard... but I'm equally positive you won't even try. If you can't muster a post without insults then don't bother with another post, I feel no need to waste my time with people that know their facts can't carry their argument but aren't mature enough to deal with it.

102 posted on Saturday, September 17, 2005 12:19:57 AM by discostu (When someone tries to kill you, you try to kill them right back)


To: cubreporter

You have more than any career woman in this whole world and your legacy will go on forever.
The hand that rocks the cradle, rules the world.
107 posted on Saturday, September 17, 2005 12:48:44 AM by metmom (Welfare was never meant to be a career choice.)


A few more comments from me, Truth 1. This woman, (Crackingham, as well as discostu) got some nasty comments, void of any reason, of course. They stood their ground just fine. First, it was said, the hand the rocks the cradle, rules the world. As well, she enables the human and family legacy to continue and thrive. We place no value on motherhood anymore. That is why we are going to hell, so to speak. The thing is, you can see other people, female for the most part, agreeing with my sentiments and ideas. Its not just me! It does make sense.

One of my favorites from this reference above is the following, though I did not catch the original post browsing. Notice how this guy refuses to accept reality and the failure of the present system, which causes its one problems and ours, too. We'll call him "Cluless in Scotland  :

Clueless: So, you think that it's okay for a 15 year old girl to marry , keep house, and still go to high school? 

>>Me: And go to high school? Oh no! That has to go. That is the problem! Education way past its need, due to governments wanting to program kids and undo the teaching of parents. Sorry Clueless, but your wrong on this one! But you got the 1st 2 right.<<

Clueless: And what, pray tell, is her 16 or 17 or 18 year old husband doing?

>>Me: Working as he should be at that age. In God's system, land is an inherited right and in a just system, jobs would be a right and be governed with protections for workers. That we do not do it this way is why immoral indiscriminate sexual relations are everywhere causing incredible amounts of harm to our whole system.<<

Clueless: We don't live in a time when 15 year old girls and their slightly older husbands can make it on their own.

>>Me: Oh, so you get it! This is what our society is doing wrong. They should be able to make it on their own. Land should be given, not bought. A right, not a cost that takes 40 years to pay off. Long live God and His rules!<<

Clueless: The answer is for boys to keep it in their pants and for girls to go back to keeping their knees locked. And don't tell me that they can't do it; previous generations did it.

>>Me: He really thinks that will work. See how clueless dipstick really is? He is unaware how promiscuous and available sex is. We have lost our young and anyway to get them back. He wants to stick his head in the sand and remain in denial. What big help he is, huh? Oh, and he says it has been done before. Why yes, when God reserved land for everyone in His kingdom of Israel in the Bible. A right of coming of age! Even in our society, peasants once married young and started breeding, even though as serfs and tenant workers of land. But once industry became dominant, we lost it all. Id did not work after than. Clueless does not really know history at all. He lives in darkness and blindness and does not know God or intelligence..<<

How credible would this jerk be to anyone young, or anyone of good sense? He would be laughed at and ignored, if not attacked. But he does sound like many Christians, so called. Take a look at yourselves!

The Dread of Younger Women
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Another thing that particularly strikes a mother or other older women around the young woman is that they are getting older and past the point where men might find them very attractive. They look in the mirror and perhaps see more body fat, wrinkles where none were before, blemishes of various types on the skin, and all sorts of things that tell them that their days of youth are gone and much of their looks along with it. This can be a downright traumatic experience for a woman when she finally confronts it. Its far from easy for men, either.

Women, more than men, I believe, are concerned about their looks all their previous life. And I think that women are more affected by looks or lack of them. Hollywood women dread the old age that comes upon them. They get plastic surgery and everything else trying to hold off the inevitable. Without the looks, there will be a lot less demand for them in Hollywood as no man wants to watch or stare at an old and wrinkled woman. He might still like her but Hollywood is about looks, not personality. After all, it is fantasies and dreams that Hollywood sells.

I think a woman becomes very insecure and frightened when her looks begin to desert her and her very youthful and appealing daughter makes it painfully clear that she is not what she used to be. She is anxious about her own looks and older women in general are just plain scared of the threat and competition that a young woman represents. I think the real pain and betrayal a woman feels when her husband takes up with a younger woman is the fact she can not match or compete with the younger woman looks wise and it is not her fault and not within her control. She feels that total loss of control and great anger that the younger woman would not respect her relationship. She has every right to be angry and frightened, too. The Bible sternly condemns a man cheating on his wife.

She wishes that she could be young again so as to be able to compete on even ground with this newcomer. She is very jealous of the new and young upstart. And I suspect, that to some degree, many mothers feel at least a touch of jealousy toward their young blossoming daughters who have their whole life before them and have that beauty of youth. Between the competition, the jealousy, the envy, the realization that her own looks are nearing their end, it can all be devastating. And it can affect how they view their daughter's sexuality.

We might like to imagine that parents would not resent or be jealous of their kids, but the sad reality is that it happens quite a bit. Related to this phenomenon is the one where a parent tries to live vicariously through their child. Both are obstacles that kids too often face. Never underestimate just how much jealousy parents can feel toward their kids when the youth of the parents is long gone and the kids are just coming into it. It is often a very big obstacle and one seldom acknowledged by the world and psychology.

Just the presence of a young woman can seem like a dire threat to an older woman. She knows the appeal is great. And if the man should be caught admiring the young woman, it could send the older wife into near panic. It definitely promotes insecurity and discomfort. Of course, the man can do much to relieve the situation or add to it. A good man should try to be careful about watching the younger woman and try to reassure his wife as her looks decline as they inevitably do. But a woman also has to be on guard not to let her fears get out of hand or irrational. A man is a creature very much ruled by appreciation for beauty. It is a strong and ever present instinct.

If a woman does not try hard to get a grip on herself, her insecurities, fears, and jealousy, it could do a lot of harm and damage to her relationship with her daughter, at a time when her daughter needs her experience and advice the most. But if the mother is out of control, she will not be able to offer good advice. She will be reacting out of fear and other insecure emotions. She will have become irrational and useless. The daughter will sense the lack of good will in the mother's reactions and the two will become enemies when they need to be friends.

This is why a mother can behave almost like a mad woman and react so extreme and see interest in her daughter by men as nothing but loathsome, evil, and irritating. She will take out all her fear and rage on the poor young man who has an interest in the daughter. She may get downright hysterical over the situation. But it will have little basis in logic and reasoning. It will be a result of the sub-conscious and all that is dark inside her. She needs to do some real soul searching.

I think it goes without saying that we all need to do a better job in coping with aging. There is much we all tend to ignore or put on our kids because we don't want to deal with it in a proper way. Aging is an inevitable part of life and we need to understand early in our life that youth does not last long and that we should not squander or waste it. But when we are young, it seems like we have forever. Age doesn't hit us until it hits us. You like that, do ya? And the time arrives far faster than we thought it would and we suddenly realize that the better part of our life and its opportunities has passed us by.

I saw an interesting episode of Tough Love 2 in January 2010 on VH1. This match maker and his mother try to help women overcome their personality defects that are keeping them from romance and relationships. It is a good program regardless of entertainment goals. It has much to teach, if you give it a try. But in one particular episode, the match maker gets the women made up as very old. There were many bitter protest and most of them dreaded it. One almost refused. Then he brought in some women in their late 40s to maybe 60s to come in talk to the girls and tell them the regrets these old women had due to unrealistic expectation in their youth and how they squandered that very narrow window of opportunity and time to get and keep a man.

It made a big impression on the younger women, who never saw that day coming till it was pointed out to them by older women. In fact, this one exercise probably woke them up more than any other the match maker had done throughout the last 2 seasons. This is the sort of talking and thinking that needs to be passed on to the younger, and maybe to parents, too. Do they really understand the limited time their daughters have? I do not think so. But we need to listen to those of the older generation and experience. They know. They have been there and often failed. They can you help avoid the same failure.

Fathers may also be dealing with things when their daughters bloom. Again, they have not prepared. Maybe, they, too, see their looks slipping away. They remember when they were young how all they wanted to do was get into a girl's pants and use her. They remember their shallow emotions and intense desires and dread a guy doing it to their girl. Yeah, now suddenly it matters. But not every guy who likes their daughter is as shallow as they might once have been.

And the father may also be jealous of the now young man. The father, too, becomes aware of his fading youth. He may resent the fact this guy might get a chance to enjoy youth and maybe the father's daughter, too. We might call this a conflict of interest. They resent the youth of their kids and the fact it is gone for themselves. Pain, jealousy, and so many other factors help cloud, distort, and corrupt the thinking and attitudes of the parents so that they become almost non-functional and useless to their blossoming kids. One always has to be on guard against their dark side or it could really cause a lot of harm and regret.

I think there is no question that aging has been an under-rated challenge that all people have and will continue to face and deal with or ignore and react hysterical about. We need a lot of work and development in this area. And preparing our kids is the other great challenge that precedes our own mortality. My feeling is that they are likely the greatest challenges that we ever face, except for the death of a loved one or a divorce. So now we have something to work on, right?

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So the question we have hopefully answered is whether our daughters are capable of being involved in a relationship with a man or not. I believe they can be. But they may not be ready, due to our lack of knowledge or neglect of our responsibility. And that will affect and impact the teen for the rest of their lives until they get married and afterward, too, no matter what age they start at. So age does not make the  difference. If we don't prepare them, we are only harming them as it is not likely they will be able to hold out till 25 or 30 to marry. They will break down sometime earlier.

Girls need to understand that they need to take advantage of what looks they have to catch a man as soon as possible if they ever want to settle down. The sooner they do so, the better the man that they can catch and keep. If they wait till 30 to marry and just play around till then, they may hurt their reputation or may lose enough looks that will force them to have to settle for much less of a man than they would have, if they had used their looks when they had them to marry rather than just play around.

Fornication should be one of our biggest concerns if we are Christians. Too much can happen when people are not married and get used to playing around. God's rules should be the utmost concern for Christians. So marriage has to be considered pretty early on, to be practical. That being the case, we may have to lower our financial and lifestyle expectations in order to avoid the worst forms of sin and the many consequences that can come from them.

I think people today put way too much emphasis on having a house, a nice car, and all the other material trappings that we place so much importance on. But a spiritually inclined person will not care if they do not live in a fancy house or drive a nice car. As long as it gets them from one place to another, they are content. We are spoiled and materialistic in America. We are addicted to the fine things of life just as a junkie is to drugs. So we emphasize getting a good job, living in a nice area, etc. What good is all that when you are busy fornicating your life away as many young people do? A serious case of misplaced values.

>>I might add here as of Dec. 27, 2008, that our expectations of having it all are what has brought a depression upon us and one that will get far worse in the next year or two. We accepted grossly inflated house prices to have the impossible to attain dream, and got suckered into ridiculous mortgages while the value of our houses is half of what the mortgage is and will probably fall a lot more before it is through. We have paid a high price for the expectations we had. It would have been better is we had lived within our means without credit and accepted much less for a lifestyle. I doubt many have adjusted their expectations even yet. The couple who expects little of life will do far better and be more happy.<<

Some will say: Well, many end up settling down later in life and do OK. That depends! Some do! But many have many bitter problems left over from doing that. Herpes, AIDS, unwanted kids that ruin their financial lives, bad relations and maybe loneliness later when they can't find a good mate anymore as they don't have the looks or whatever. In addition, there will be plenty of young people around when Christ returns to judge and cleanse the earth. All those young fornicating at that time, will die. Whenever it is that Jesus shows up, we do not want to be found in a rebellious disobedient state. Many will not be expecting the end when it finally comes. They will be caught by surprise. So you need to get your acts together fast and certain. You can not afford to put this off now, this late in the judgment game.

It is my perhaps overly idealistic (unrealistic?) opinion that having a good husband or wife is among the most important things in life and that if one has love, who cares where they live or what car they drive. If you have each other and you have God, you have a lot. Consider these next Bible passages!

Proverbs 15:17 Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fatted ox and hatred with it.

Ecclesiastes 4:
  9 Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labor.
10 For if they fall, this one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him, the one that falls, and there is not another to lift him up.
11 Also if two lie together, then they have warmth; but for one, how is he warm?
12 And if one overthrows him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly torn apart.

Ecclesiastes 9:9  Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life which he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun.

Or as the Beatles put it:
"I don't care too - much for money
Money can't buy me love . . . Can't buy me love . . ."

Really, what is it you value? Jesus said it should be spiritual things. God is said to be love. So love could be considered quite spiritual. Some people regard spiritual things as more important than money and materialism. But I realize that is not the case in America. Jesus also said (GLT - Matt. 6:21)  "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." That is why America is in jeopardy in so many ways. Now you know why kids are shooting each other in school all the time. We lost our sense of real values in this country. It shows everywhere.

GLT) - Matt 6:
19 Do not treasure up for you treasures on the earth, where moth and rust cause to vanish, and where thieves dig through and steal.
20 But treasure up for you treasures in Heaven, where neither moth nor rust cause to vanish, and where thieves do not dig through and steal.

Further, there are issues of civil and human rights and decency. We could end up in double jeopardy, jeopardy with both God and men if we ignore the issues. How will God take to our punishing a young man severely for taking in interest and desire in our young teen daughters as God intended? Shall we punish a man for the instinct that God gave to him? God could end up punishing us for harshly judging a young man and making him out to be monster or pervert when God does not consider him any such thing.

We have about 10 short years to teach our kids what they should know. So we have to get at it early and attack the problem with fury. Their happiness and survival both depend on it. We do want them to be happy, don't we? And we need to get a grip on our own irrational emotions and behavior.

Life can be and should be, a beautiful thing. For a young man or woman, the world can hold so much promise. As we get older, we find out that life is not a bowl of cherries. We suffer lots of disillusionment and heartbreak. My belief is that the better we help our kids understand that ugly side of life, the better they will be able to cope with it all. They can adjust their sights and expectations to more realistic levels and find happiness and comfort in a few small ways and wait for the time when God will make it all right for us all.

Keep in mind that money is not everything and that we may give money too much concern and importance. One can be happy without having a whole lot of money. In the USA, poverty is a relative thing. It is not like we are apt to starve if we are willing to work. And with parents helping, perhaps sharing their own house, young couples should be able to do OK and be happy. Happiness will not or should not be dependant upon great wealth. Most rich people are not happy nor are they very sound of mind anymore than anyone else. Sometimes they can act very disturbed, despite their wealth and/or fame.

There is nothing like education and preparation. When the military needs to send men to war, they first give them as much preparation as possible so that they will be ready for the worst. We need to do the same. In many respects, life in a world gone mad is a battle field and a war. We need to prepare our kids for that so that they don't get killed or in this case, severely hurt by life.

They could end up spending years paying a therapist $75 or $150 an hour if you don't. Or maybe they will end up drinking and doing drugs if you don't prepare them. Who knows what might happen. But I think it is safe to say that sex and sexuality are a big part of every person's life. We are sexual creatures by God's design and intention. We need to allow for sexual desire and behavior, but in ways that will be acceptable to God.

If you love your kids, you will let them be what they were intended to be in the way that God set out for us all. To not let them be as God intended is to not love them and to reject God and His intentions, too. That could come with serious consequences for you. Don't let yourselves be found fighting against God. You will certainly be the loser in that battle.

I'm Not Done Yet
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While I recommend early marriages for young adults, none of us can ignore the law. I don't believe in ignoring the law. If the law requires parental and governmental permission, and it usually does, then you should get it and not presumptuously violate any laws. You would not be breaking God's laws but you would be breaking the government's and that could cost you big time.

Governments have their own hidden agenda and often find it beneficial to cater to the hysterical people and those who favor extremes. Extremists often prefer the sacrifice of freedom in order to try to obtain a level of security and protection that for one, is not possible, and second, in my opinion, is not worth what you have to sacrifice for it. But hysterical and irrational people will not see it that way.

Women who were sexually abused as young girls, pre-pubescent girls, are often traumatized (and rightly so), and often have trouble coping with that trauma and making good sense of anything. They will often be very irrational in their reasoning. They can not fathom that any girl, pre or post pubescent, could ever be willing or consensual with an adult male in sexual relations. As far as many of them are concerned, any sex of any type, with any female under the age of 18, if not 19, is just plain abuse and is wrong. You will not be able to reason with them or show them logic.

The government, on the other hand, finds this hysterical and irrational attitude most convenient and desirable. For it allows them to separate the youth from the adults, cutting off any wisdom from reaching the youth. The youth only have each other and that is just fine as far as the rich and their social engineers are concerned. A division between the young and old is welcomed by powers over us so they cater to the irrational women who have been abused, all in the name of protecting the children. Once young people are separated and alienated from their elders, they can be easily misled and manipulated.

A young woman entering into a relationship with an intelligent man of 30 could seriously disrupt the isolation desired by those who control and rule us. Before you know it, the young woman would learn all sorts of things from the wiser man of 30 and she would spread it to all her friends near her age. It would be hard to contain such a wild fire of information. So authorities work hard to keep this from happening by creating a really nasty stigma about men "cavorting" with young teen aged women, which they call girls, despite the secondary sexual characteristics and newly found libido. And authorities go out of their way to make the punishment for violating the prohibition very severe so as to keep the young women isolated. Yet, despite that, many men continue to pursue the youthful women for obvious reasons, despite the danger.

So for anyone to consider disobeying the law would be a dangerous thing as the governments and legal judicial process has demonstrated time and again that they are willing to crucify anyone who should trespass their barriers that they have set up between the young and the old. You do have the right to petition your representatives to change the laws and may do that if you like but I would not advise disobeying the law, even if it is not wrong in the eyes of God. We are instructed by the Apostles to obey the ruling authorities where it does not slight God's law. So while being denied the right to pursue a young woman is unreasonable and unjust, it does not violate any of God's laws and should be obeyed.

We live in a very dangerous and precarious time. A time not far from the destruction that mankind will bring upon itself. We are growing progressively more hostile to good sound reasoning and logic. We are also growing closer and becoming more irrational as a nation as well. In psychological terms, we are becoming more neurotic and coming dangerously close to even becoming psychotic, the point of grossly distorted if not completely lost touch with reality. It is a sign of the times. So the only advice I can give is try to avoid coming in contact with a law process that is neither just nor fair, and certainly not a reasonable or rational process with good intentions.

What I find most disturbing is that more and more, the government is passing rules that make intentions more serious and accountable than the actual crime. For instance, with hate crimes, whether you kill, injure, maim, or rape, is not as important as what reason you do it for. That is insane. A person is dead! Does the reason really matter? Is it going to make a difference? The person is still dead regardless of the reason they were killed. Whatever the reason, the crime should be deterred by punishment. But maybe we just don't care about all murders equally. That is inconsistent and wicked.

In cases of child pornography, it is not what you do but what you think that has become the issue in several cases that have received national attention. You can be seen as guilty, not for having done anything, but for merely having fantasized about something. One man had written about a private fantasy of sex with a girl, though I am not aware of the precise age. He was found guilty of the fantasy and sentenced to time.

I have a friend who was interrogated by the police as part of the process of joining the police force. He was questioned as to whether he had ever had any fantasies about teenage girls. At first he was going to be honest about their attractiveness, but after the first answer, he decided to modify his answer as they were concerned about any confession about even fantasizing about teens. The whole idea is preposterous. We can no more control what we find attractive than we can control what tastes good to us. We are born with it or it develops without us even understanding why or how.

Fantasies? We can control how far we allow them in our head, but as soon as we go to sleep, we will lose that control and our dreams will take us there even if we don't take ourselves there when awake. But what really concerns me is how the law and government have become preoccupied with what goes on in our heads. It is none of their, or anyone else's, business. As long as things stay in our heads, that is all that should matter.

I think all of us have had crazy day dreams or fantasies at one time or another. How many of us have been guilty of thinking about sex with a married woman or even a single woman? Should we imagine that the brain, wired to beauty and sex, should be able to distinguish between 17 and 19? Only the rational analytical side can do that. The more primitive limbic system makes no such distinction and it not capable of such a distinction. Anthropologists and psychologists should understand this and some do. But apparently, it has made no impact on lawyers, police, and politicians who have no regard for hard science and prefer that sinister goals dictate law and punishment.

When a man can be condemned for that which is natural and instinctive to him, even when he does not act on it and makes every effort to conform to our laws, then we have left him no hope or chance in our society. He is guilty by reason of genetics and birth. Further, we are inconsistent. We say that homosexuals are born with their desires and should not be faulted for their inclinations and I agree. Then why doesn't that apply to heterosexuals, too? Why aren't they recognized for not being able to control what is appealing to them or not? That is something they are born with.

How many of us have fantasized, though nothing more, about killing our boss or some other person who really got us angry or frustrated? Really, if our thoughts were enough to convict us, nearly all of us would have to go to prison. How sensible is that? How moral is that? How insane is that? If we are willing to behave, we should not be judged for what might be in our heads and beyond our control in our heads.

The real problem is that we often do not give our laws much thought. We over-react, or act on emotions and do not carefully analyze what we are contemplating. We let some hysterical and out of control abuse victim cause us to also react foolishly, instead of being careful to remain logical, rational, and in control. We allowed our thoughts and feelings to run away with us. At least those who might fantasize do not let their emotions and thoughts run away from them. And we need to get away from the concepts of "thought or intention crimes." We need to stick to worrying about deeds, not supposed intentions or fantasies. No one has a right to be in our heads except us! That is perhaps even more sacred than keeping others out of our bodies.

But I think getting into people's heads appeals to governments and evil despots as they want total control and always are in fear of what might actually be in a person's head. The really paranoid governments and despots of the past usually just kill or imprison where there is merely doubt. And because they are paranoid, they doubt nearly everyone. It is a sign of great mental imbalance and our government is showing too many signs of such imbalance. We are also showing the same signs of imbalance and psychosis. We need to get control of ourselves before it is too late.

The best you can do is wait for God to straighten the whole mess out. But on the other hand, if your daughter falls for a young adult man, you ought to be finding some mercy for him, knowing how God may feel about the matter. God will punish the nations for their many sins. Don't let Him find a reason to punish you, too. And you might want to make your daughter understand how she might cause great harm to the man she claims to love.

Meanwhile, if you are a young man, you need not feel guilty because you find a teen aged woman attractive. That is the way God intended it as far as I can rationally and reasonably discern. And if you are one of those teen girls who likes a man, consider what would happen to him if you take up with him in a relationship that becomes sexual. Do you want to see him in prison and raped by men? If not, wait till you can get your parent's and the government's permission, which can, in some states, be 15, but may end up having to be 18. Don't ignore the law.

The saddest thing about this is that some girls could care less about what happens to a guy over 18 that they take up with. The guy ends up dead in a shoot out or goes to prison for statutory rape. The girl walks away with no accountability or guilt whatsoever. This would not be the case in the Bible. I ask Christians, do you care about the Bible and God's ways? Then don't make a man an escape goat for your own failures and those of your daughter. Make her accountable for what she did and settle the situation in a way that God would approve of, while still making the law happy.\

It is time to stop looking at 12 or 13 year olds as being kids or "little" children. They are very capable of being young adults and should be expected to be responsible and accountable and obey God faithfully. We know there is some element maturity that will continue to develop but basics are there. If we make excuses and let them off the hook, all hell will break loose. And then the final stage we call puberty arrives, its time to act and act fast, if possible. Other than that, we might have to relax other expectations as to curiosity and exploration and expectations. See my sex articles for more on that!

Why It Might Be Good To Wait
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I know this is not going to be popular but it is worth considering this one last point. Look how completely alienated the world has become from God's ways. We make a natural and wholesome thing out to be something obscene and perverted and monstrous. We truly have become a wicked world and must pay the price for that. Luckily for Christians, you have a hope of someday, likely soon, when the world will be brought into harmony with God and none of us will be ugly or undesirable anymore. And we will all be married and loved. It is worth being patient and waiting for, don't you think?

This life in this world is only for a short while, about 70 to 90 years at most whereas life forever in God's kingdom, whether here on earth as perfect people in the flesh or in heaven as spirits. But I believe that many of us can look forward to living in a paradise earth. You can check out the related articles at the end of this article to see more proof of that. But if it is true, what does it mean for spme who are anxious to marry?

Well, first of all, since we are to live and live forever on earth, there really isn't that big a hurry is there? It is not like marriage will never happen or not come along. Granted our desires are strong but the opportunity to get married will always be there and get better in God's Kingdom.

Yes, we will marry and have sex in God's Kingdom. Sex is not going anywhere. It is a part of us and who we are and God intended us to live forever and breed forever. So one does not need to rush to get married. Even if we should wait a life time for a mate, in God's Kingdom, we will definitely all have one as was intended by our Creator, our God, Jehovah. No one will be ugly or be allowed to continue with an ugly personality, either.

In fact, when you think about it, since everyone will look a lot better, with obesity and starvation both being a thing of the past, as well as every other sort of imperfection that has crept into our species, then finding a desirable mate will be effortless. And with our options of what to do when we grow up being far less due to each of us living off the land to some degree, it will be far easier to find someone with common goals. Further, personalities will be much more pleasant. That is good for finding a mate, it is also good when having to live with neighbors or whatever.

So young people, single people, widowed or divorced people need not be anxious that they are not married. Sooner or later, they definitely will be. God will see to it. So with a great and certain hope for the future, one can maybe relax about the imperfect and often undesirable present where they may not currently have what they want. It will only be a matter of time and all our desires will be satisfied.

Imagine, you old people, suddenly getting your youth, beauty, energy, and health back . . . and better than you ever had them before. Maybe you were born defective. You will finally be given what you never had before. The deaf will hear, the blind will see, the crippled will walk, jump, and run with joy. The dead will rise.

How many of you out there do not think you are attractive? There may be many. Want to settle for something less than satisfactory? Since God's Kingdom is nearly upon us, if we wait, we will get something better if we are patient. Of course, since we are all to look much better then, than we may look right now, the same could be said about whoever we marry. But still, greater opportunities may exist on the other side of Armageddon.

The problem with getting married right now is that there are lots of problems and headaches, not to mention, finances, that make marriage very difficult and trying. We are all full of imperfection, including personalities. If we wait till after God establishes (again) the earth as a paradise, we won't have to deal with as many headaches as we would on this side of Armageddon.

There is something to consider, though. While everyone inherits a place in God's Kingdom, Jesus makes it clear that not all who are prominent and have great status in this time will continue to have it on the other side. Many who are big deals now will become shamed and disgraced, at least for a while, in God's Kingdom. Conversely, many who are thought of as nothing now will end up with a good deal of status and prominence as they sought God's will while in this life and so are granted a great name and status on the other side. Jesus indicated that there would be quite a few who would switch places in the Kingdom of his Father.

Luke 13:
27 And He will say, I tell you I do not know you, from where you are. "Stand back from Me all workers of unrighteousness!" [Psa. 6:8] 
28 There will be weeping and gnashing of the teeth when you see Abraham and Isaac and Jacob and all the prophets in the kingdom of God, but yourselves being thrust outside. 
29 And they will come from east and west, and from north and south, and will recline in the kingdom of God. 
30 And, behold, there are last ones who will be first, and there are first ones who will be last.

It is rather hard to know for sure who you are marrying in this system. People are hard to know or estimate. They can be full of surprises and that can be a bad thing. It might be better to wait till you become better trained by God to discern who is and who isn't worth marrying. If you do marry in this system, find someone who is true and genuine about serving God, they are the ones who are most apt to stand out after Armageddon.

What I am trying to say in all this is to have a long term outlook on life and living. You will not be single forever. The time will come when you will get married if you inherit a place on earth. Those in heaven will be spirits, angels, brothers of Christ to rule as kings and priests. They do not marry. But with all the challenges and uncertainties of today, waiting can make a lot of sense, even though none of us really wants to do that.

Could Parents Do More?

Well, obviously! But what? That is what I will take a stab at now, briefly. For starters, it would be nice if we all had solid communities to belong to, but unless you are in a church, you likely won't. But finding connections and networks of like minds is important and there is no reason why churches and religious denominations could not host conventions or get-togethers for the young, locally and beyond that as well. Little autobiographies, especially with the internet now available, could be published. e-Harmony does matching according to personality and I think this would be good with Christians. Finding someone of similar values and beliefs is important. But this should all be done while kids are very young, say beginning at 8 or 9, so that when early teen years arrive they will hopefully have found someone of good interest for the next step.

Then the next step would be for the kids to marry by mid teens in most cases, with the kids living with one or the other set of parents so that they can continue their instruction and adaptation to married life and even having kids, if they so desire. Maybe birth control would be good for several years first. Just an option. I would say laws need to be changed but that is not likely to happen. So parents will have to bear the burden as they always did in the Bible. Something wrong with the Bible?

Living with one of the sets of parents reduces living costs down to very little. This prevents finances from sabotaging a relationship. With this strain removed, the relationship has a far greater chance of success. And parents could be supportive instead of criticizing and refusing help. I don't even know why parents would be like that. Have they no fear of God? Have they so little compassion for what their kids face? You tell me!

With lots of help and guidance, a couple of say 15 or so could marry and get the sex out of the way. Now undistracted by their satiated libidos, they can focus on starting a business or getting an education near to home under the protective influence of the parents. In Bible times, parents provided land or taught the son a trade so that he could carry one a family. Parents now don't think that should be their job. They are wrong, dead wrong! A son or daughter is a life long commitment, not one that ends at 18. That was and is the devil's rule, not God's! Offspring are to be helped throughout the lives of parents, as the parents will likely always have more experience than their kids and can pass this on.

So children should be a joy, not a burden and the same for grandchildren. Helping them throughout their lives builds the relationship between parents and children and as parents age and can not reproduce anymore, they have kids and grandkids to guide and enjoy. Why do so many just seem to want to get rid of their kids. Well, because someone somewhere suggested that kids should be able to stand on their own 2 feet without help. Where does it say that in the Bible? It is our wicked world guided, ultimately, by the devil that says this. Stop listening to the devil and you'll be fine.

The more individual and unorthodox your religious beliefs, the more you will have to hunt for like minded souls so that you might find possible matches for your kids to marry. So the search for like minded people should begin as soon as you marry, at the latest. Making friends in your own childhood is even better. You can never start too early.

The problem to day is that parents wait till their kids are in their 20s and 30s. This is way too late. It needs to happen in the mid teens. And the sooner you begin for that day, the better. God will demand an accounting of each parent. He will want to know if you loved the kids He gave you and if you took good care of them and provided, to the best of your ability, for them, in ALL their needs. What will you say to Him? You could say: "Well, we didn't think we owed our kids anything."

But then God is apt to say to you, "Then I don't own you anything, either. Why should I care for you when you did not care for your own, either? To the lake of fire with you!" Give it some thought. Your kids need you just like we all need God all the time. Either be there for them or God might not be there for you. Its that serious. Don't leave things to the last minute. As soon as your kids are born, you have to start preparing for their marriage and adult lives. It is you assigned job by God. Do it or die!

Advice to Think About
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1 Corinthians 7:
20 Every one should remain in the state in which he was called. 
21 Were you a slave when called? Never mind. But if you can gain your freedom, avail yourself of the opportunity. 
22 For he who was called in the Lord as a slave is a freedman of the Lord. Likewise he who was free when called is a slave of Christ. 
23 You were bought with a price; do not become slaves of men. 
24 So, brethren, in whatever state each was called, there let him remain with God.

These words ought to give us all something to think about. We are always looking to improve our situation. We might think we would be happier if this or that were the case. But in reality, no matter what situation or state your in, you can find happiness. Enjoy the benefits of whatever state you have come to be in. In the case of being single, there are clearly advantages as well as things undesirable. Paul next continues:

1 Corinthians 7:
25 Now concerning the unmarried, I have no command of the Lord, but I give my opinion as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy.
26 I think that in view of the present distress it is well for a person to remain as he is.
27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek marriage.
28 But if you marry, you do not sin, and if a girl marries she does not sin. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that.

Paul does warn us that marriage can be a hassle. We marry a person expecting the best but sometimes, the best is not what we get. Life can even become a living hell if married to the wrong person.

1 Corinthians 7:
29 I mean, brethren, the appointed time has grown very short; from now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none,
30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods,
31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the form of this world is passing away.
32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the affairs of the Lord, how to please the Lord;
33 but the married man is anxious about worldly affairs, how to please his wife,
34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried woman or girl is anxious about the affairs of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit; but the married woman is anxious about worldly affairs, how to please her husband.
35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.

It becomes clear here that if one has some great ambition, perhaps serving the Lord in some outstanding way, marriage could interfere. But even if you were to prefer to be married, which is fine and is not a sin by any means, nor is it even a sign of being more spiritual or something like that. There is no superiority, spiritually speaking, because you are single or capable of remaining single. But being single is a good chance to get well acquainted with the Bible and that could have many benefits far beyond the present time.

Consider again that those who serve God with diligence and effort here in this time will be richly rewarded in the future in God's Kingdom. That should not be taken lightly if you are a Christian. While your single, make the most of it so you will have something to show for yourself in God's Kingdom. Further, if you are one who shows a lot of interest in the things of God, that will definitely make you more desirable to others of the opposite sex who also have such an interest in God.

1 Corinthians 7:
36 If any one thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry--it is no sin.
37 But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well.
38 So that he who marries his betrothed does well; and he who refrains from marriage will do better.
39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If the husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.
40 But in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I have the Spirit of God.

Paul just reinforces here that single people will do better when it comes to serving God. They have an advantage that married people can not compete with. Many a woman married a man, only to become miserable afterward. We are all a mess and the greatest hopes can turn in to nightmares very easy. The grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence. Enjoy whatever side you are on.

I just want to say that it has been my impression that since many believe that we are all going to heaven, and since heaven does not seem all that appealing to many, since it is something we have never experienced, many are not that enthused about waiting for such a life. We want to experience the thrill and excitement of love and sex. Many are not sure that there will be sex in heaven. There won't be. Jesus said that [Luke 20:27]. But if we can be sure that what we really want is what is going to be awaiting us, love, marriage, and sex, then maybe we will find it easier to be patient and wait. Do you honestly think God or His son want anyone in heaven who does not want to be there or feels he is being slighted if he ends up there? I think not. God does not throw His pearls before swine. If you want earth and marriage, you shall have it. But for many, the honor and prestige of serving in heaven is too great to resist if it should be granted to them.

But still, given the very loose and immoral climate we live in, I think marriage is the best, the safest route to take. I think it is the road most preferred by us all as well. But if you have high expectations for a wife or husband, waiting might be the better option if you are not feeling severely tempted.

The Bottom Line
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It might be good for young teens to wait but the reality is that most teens will not take the high road. You can't make them do it, either. Parents have got to do more to accommodate their kids in this wicked immoral world of filth and corruption as we head toward the disaster that will end with God stepping in and saving those He loves. Kids are not going to be able to hold out too long.

Worst of all, the possibility exists that they may sin at a time when it finally does all go to hell and judgment day arrives. Do you want your kids sinning in a serious way when that happens, knowing that God does hold kids accountable? Time to get sober and realize that sex and marriage are not the worst things that could happen. But sex without marriage is one of the worst things that could happen if the timing is near Armageddon. Not to mention pregnancy, disease, and financial instability and hardship. So start improving things for your kids today before it is too late.

Sad to say, but some are going to get caught with their pants down, so to speak. Don't be one of them or let your precious kids become one of them because you didn't want to deal with them being sexual. Deal with it and don't fight nature. Instead, try to work with it in an acceptable way so that your kids will be found to be acceptable to God by at least being married if they must do it.

Recent Additions to Consider
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Below is a video interview and a newspaper article. The girl does not look 10 or 11. She looks like a teen if not older in the video. She was the "provocateur" who sought out the 18 year old man. Bulgaria says 14 year olds can consent to sex. She had that appearance. But the young man, and he is relatively young, seems well intentioned and his excuse is a good one. My comments to follow the article.
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Bulgarian Girl, 11, Gives Birth to Her Daughter... on Her Wedding Day
Views on BG | November 4, 2009, Wednesday

Bulgaria: Bulgarian Girl, 11, Gives Birth to Her Daughter... on Her
 Wedding Day

Korteza Zhelyazkova, 11, shows off her baby Violeta - the 19-year-old father is facing six years in jail for having sex with a minor. Photo by News of the World

The Daily Mail

An 11-year-old girl became one of the world's youngest mothers - and went into labour on the way to her wedding.

Kordeza Zhelyazkova, from Sliven in Bulgaria , was still wearing her wedding dress and tiara as she was rushed to hospital, where she gave birth to 5lb 8oz Violeta. Proudly displaying her baby, she told reporters: 'I'm not going to play with toys any more - I have a new toy now.'


Kordeza - who fell pregnant within two weeks of her 11th birthday - spent the night in hospital with Violeta and then headed back to church for her wedding with 19-year-old Jeliazko Dimitrov.


Kordeza told the News of the World: 'It feels strange to be a mum and have a baby. 'I used to play with my toys but now she is my new toy. 'She is so beautiful, I love her. Violeta is the child and I must grow up. I am not going back to school - I am a mother now.'

>>>Note her very mature attitude; "I must grow up." No excuses. Duty calls and must be answered. How unlike the USA. If you expect it from them, they will do it! <<<


The couple met when Jeliazko rescued Kordeza from bullies in the playground.

However he now faces six years in jail for having sex with a minor, telling the paper his fears when he found out Kordeza was pregnant. He said: 'I was really scared. 'We didn't plan to have sex or a baby although I fell in love with Kordeza the moment I saw her. He added: 'I was walking past the school when I saw some boys mocking her and I told them to leave her alone. 'Then she arranged to meet me and asked me out on our first date. I thought she was 15. She didn't tell me she was 11.'


Kordeza added: 'I didn't want to say in case he wouldn't fancy me.' Their daughter was conceived within a week of their meeting.

Kordeza said: 'I didn't know I was pregnant until my grandmother saw I had put on weight. I just thought I'd eaten too many burgers.'


Her grandmother Dida, 55, said: 'It's normal for our girls to have babies young. It's our tradition. But I didn't want it for my Kordeza - I felt she was too young.'

The family planned a three-day Roma wedding for October 22 - so Kordeza and Jeliazko could be married before the baby was born.

But Kordeza went into labour a week early, on the second day of the ceremony.


She said: 'I had been having pain in the morning and a couple of hours into the wedding it got worse.' She was rushed to hospital and gave birth 20 minutes later. Kordeza said: 'It was quite easy but painful too. I was very happy when I saw her. She has a nose like me and hair like Jeliazko.'


Both grandmothers will be guardians of baby Violeta, and Kordeza and her daughter will receive £70 a month in state benefits.

The age of consent in Bulgaria is 14.

>>>End of Article<<<
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14 is a much more realistic age of consent and lower than typical in the USA. The girl easily looked 14. 10 and 11 seem quite young but as you can see, 10 is not always a little girl, at least physically. Rebecca, wife of Isaac, was said to be 10 when married. Whenever puberty arrives, one has to be ready to deal with it and accommodate it. She had the desire and went after it. What do we say to her? She has to assume responsibility for her actions and she is doing just that. Age is not something we can make black and white distinctions for. But signs of puberty are something for which we can make distinctions. These are not simple easy situations. She got pregnant by her actions and she did know what she was doing and is willing to be responsible. That is to her credit. Like it or not, the baby is born and needs cared for. Rather than imprison or condemn the young man, it is better to let him accept responsibility and raise the child with his wife.

The more you examine the factors involved in what I bring up, the more difficult it is to be judgmental, narrow minded and cut and dried about such matters. We all should be responsible and accountable for how we use our procreative abilities. Its not about age, its about maturity and accepting responsibility for our actions. Laws are not written to account for reasonable exceptions to the norm. Clearly this one was outside the typical norm. One size does not fit all and never should. Good law is reasonable, rational  and above all else, flexible and adaptable to the needs of human beings as God intended. God is not a zero tolerance God in all matters. He designed flexibility into many of his laws.

You might want to check out the other articles mentioned below. In particular, the one on education which has a lot in common with this article.

The Basic 45 Facts as They Truly Are
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  1. Maintaining sexual morality and purity to God is one of the most important of all commands issued by God, as is evidenced by Acts 15's top 4 laws.

  2. In Bible times and all other times, and places, and peoples, people married in their teens.

  3. Kids worked as labor for their families to help support the family and themselves from the beginning of time.

  4. Only recently, since about 1850, did the "media" and socially concerned "activists" tell us that marrying as teens was a bad thing and that all child labor was wrong, too.

  5. The government passed laws to make all child labor forbidden and marriage before 18 without parental consent to be wrong as well.

  6. Parental consent for people under 18 has been virtually eliminated by requiring parents to obtain court review and obtain court permission to approve marriage under 18.

  7. Nearly all parental rights and choices have been eliminated, with government claiming they know better than parents what is best for the children of parents.

  8. Parents have ignored their own God given rights and allowed them to be trampled on by oppressive totalitarian regimes who rule over them.

  9. Parents ignore their duties to God to educate, provide for in every way for their kids prior to marriage, and help their kids to find marriage partners when they bloom in their early teens.

  10. The World has drastically changed and broke with the long standing, long established past, particularly since about 1850. Knowing why is important!

  11. To take control from parents, governments have made children unaccountable, helpless, and incapable, forcing complete reliance exclusively on parents.

  12. In the sole pursuit of keeping kids financially, parents have no time for the regular duties of parenting. The benefit of child labor in behalf of the family is denied.

  13. Children used to be very well educated and behaved in childhood, typically going to college with a much greater curriculum than today and being far more accountable.

  14. A myth has been put forth that kids are not capable or as capable as they used to be, ignoring that we have kept them from being brought up properly.

  15. Our laws on accountability and responsibility for those near 18 and under are full of contradiction and hypocrisy. By their fruits you will know them.

  16. The young under 18 have become irresponsible and are encouraged to remain so, so that actions to maintain control over them and continue to treat them as kids at ever greater ages have resulted.

  17. The immaturity of our children is our own doing and that of our governments. We seek to prevent maturity and growth, and delay adulthood, without legitimate reason.

  18. Many Teens would be glad to accept maturity, adulthood, accountability, and responsibility if we properly and adequately prepared them for such and enabled them for such.

  19. Our overly sentimental feelings for kids causes us to hinder their development by keeping them as kids forever and not allowing them to learn, mature, and grow.

  20. For their own benefit, kids need to learn and adapt as soon as possible. Delays could leave them vulnerable and in danger. And learning and growth is good, not bad!

  21. Our hang-ups cause us to raise our kids all the wrong ways. We need to correct our own thinking and understand before we can help our kids.

  22. The governments and systems in place toady, have blocked all possibilities of teens growing and developing in the right ways. We share in the blame as well.

  23. The "system" is exceedingly corrupt and anti-human and not conducive to anything that would be remotely healthy for children or parents. It was intended to be that way.

  24. God made it easy to know when to marry teens off, by causing them to develop sexual reproductive powers at that time.

  25. "Young" marriages often fail, only because we, as a nation, do not enable and support them, and do everything to help the marriage to fail.

  26. Marriage has always been straining on people. But there used to be social reinforcement and now there is nearly none.

  27. Age prejudice and division, like any discrimination or division, is wicked and evil and detested by God, who requires more, not less, respect for the aged.

  28. Older people and Adults are not harmful or dangerous and are actually more beneficial and capable.

  29. "Old" and "Adult" are relative terms that are very much abused in our society.

  30. Governments want to alienate kids from "adults," so that no one can influence kids accept government approved "teachers" and "caretakers."

  31. It is very important for parents to play with and be playful with their kids. All adults should be accessible to kids, within reason and not seen as dangerous or harmful.

  32. WE do not adequately punish adults who violate trust and decency, particularly with the full rape of any age.

  33. We overly punish for much less serious crimes, thereby blurring good lines of distinction, reason, and motive.

  34. Parents should train their kids for marriage and help them pick good choices for marriage and start doing so at very young ages so they are ready to marry in early teens.

  35. Marriage in young teen years has other important benefits that come at a very short specific window of time, best taken advantage of at that time.

  36. Adults are often very jealous and resentful of the youth and beauty of teens and will try to deprive teens of their best interests.

  37. It is not likely that we can change our system now. It serves too many benefits to those in power.

  38. We must adapt to the system and yet try to accommodate the needs and benefits of our kids.

  39. We might have to change (lessen) our expectations and put up with more inconvenience and throw away the American Dream if we are to help our teens.

  40. Our children have nothing without us. We are the source (or should be) of all our kids needs. This how exactly how God intended it.

  41. We need to provide as much help for our kids as possible, since the world will do little to nothing to help or guide them.

  42. God will make parents account for how they cared for God's little lambs that each one of us brings into the world.

  43. Breeding comes with very serious responsibility in God's eyes. If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen!

  44. The last days will be very challenging and difficult for real Christians as the devil rules and guides the world.

  45. We must accept the challenge that such circumstances will bring and give more than the usual effort to help ourselves and our children remain faithful to God's laws.

Related Articles

Educate Your Children (on home schooling)
The Importance of Christian Community
The Lindmeyer Study - Adolescence, Marriage, and Parenthood in the Twentieth Century U.S.
Sex Topics Page
The Case for Early Marriage  This article is from Christianity Today but is very much like this article here of mine. Except that mine came out in early 2002, and their's came out in mid 2009. I had a 7 year jump on them. But listen, we both agree and I am glad to have such a mainstream and respected source actually agree with me. So you see, I am not crazy . . . well, maybe!
Adolescents, Morality, and Marriage - by Souldoctor - Souldoctor agrees with my article and has re-edited it to his liking and did a very good job. Worth checking out. Tell him Truth1 sent ya!

From The Washington Post:   
Mark Regnerus -- Freedom to Marry Young    Sunday, April 26, 2009

Well, well, well, do you sense the tide turning? No? It may be a slow start, but the logic is there to support it. The young should marry young.

The next 2 links address many of the same issues I bring up in this article of mine. He also links to this article on his facebook page. His videos are yet another witness to the same subject, making it 4 witnesses to my assertions. Not bad!
Problems With Youths  From:  1WatchmanMinistry  | Oct 11, 2010
"There was a time in America (and Europe) that teenagers were considered young adults and ready for adult work and responsibilities. What led to the Hippie Movement and the youth culture of rebellion and decadence that continues today? "
Something For Teenagers To Consider  From:  1WatchmanMinistry  | Nov 24, 2010  

This link below is an excellent account of how things unfolded to put young out of the reach of parents and independence.

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